Comment from Ricky1024

Excellent

This Choka 5/7-5/7-5/7-7
Had a Nautical theme.
It read and flowed as the waves flowed onto the Shoreline.
Thanks again for sharing this and have a great day.
Doctor Ricky

 Comment Written 23-May-2023

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reply by the author on 23-May-2023

Thank you very much, Dr Ricky. I appreciate your kind review.

Gypsy hugs

reply by the author on 23-May-2023

Thank you, dr Ricky. . :)

Gypsy hugs

Comment from GWHARGIS

Excellent

Really cool. Love the theme of water. Water can be many different temperaments. From the safe and cooling baby pool to the turbulent ocean. The questions posed were of the uncertainty of new love. Jump right in or touch the toe. Gretchen

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Thank you very much, Gretchen :)
Gypsy hugs

Comment from Mike Stevens

Excellent

Another fine poem, Gypsy, and I like the way you equated love with water. It can be a gentle pond on a summer's day or a raging sea that will capsize your flimsy, pathetic boat and send you down to Davy Jones's locker!

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

I love this poem. I have a feeling this is a metaphor for taking a risk on love. Will this young lady dive in after sampling the temperature of the water. Hmm? I wonder. Thank you for sharing this complete package with us.

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Yes, you are right. Not everybody gets it. Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Exceptional

This is a truly beautiful verse skilfully achieved through stunning imagery which actually sends a chill. Passionate algae tides and turbulent current hugs are my favourite lines oozing emotion. The presentation completes the job. Thanks for sharing. Debbie

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Thank you very much for your exceptional six stars review and kind feedback.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Sounds like a love poem by a mermaid to her beloved. There's a lot of passion and great use of assonance and word play like "sea and see" plus recalling sensations of touch and taste.

 Comment Written 22-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

I'm so glad you like it. Thanks to Shelley it was edited and now sounds better. How are you? I've been thinking about you. I hope all is well.

Love,

Marival

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

When I wake up you'll be gone. <-- how about "when i wake will you be gone?" ?

there's a lot of INs...

just a few thoughts i had as i read

still great imagery and good syllabic count

thank you for sharing
shelley :)

 Comment Written 21-May-2023

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reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Thank you, Shelley. You are right, there were too many ins and you sent me on an editing trip. Now it's really different. LoL

I appreciate your helpful reviews.

Gypsy hugs

reply by shelley kaye on 22-May-2023

it's great!! 😊👍

reply by the author on 22-May-2023

Thank you 😊

Comment from royowen

Excellent

I love this, I thought of this when I read this. "Let me dip my lithe lorn feet in your livid, limpet-like languid liquid love pools" heh heh. That's terrible isn't it, talk about alliteration gone mad. Well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 21-May-2023

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reply by the author on 21-May-2023

I like it :) it's very poetic and imagistic. Thank you very much, Roy. You are always kind and helpful and I appreciate it. May you have a wonderful day.

Gypsy hugs

reply by royowen on 21-May-2023

Silly me

reply by the author on 22-May-2023

I like the silly you. :) you should let him out more often. Hehe

reply by royowen on 22-May-2023

Heh heh

Comment from patcelaw

Excellent

This is beautifully worded in a beautifully presented poem for the contest. I wish you the very best in all of your writing. I enjoyed this poem very much. Very much. Patricia

 Comment Written 21-May-2023

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reply by the author on 21-May-2023

You are always kind and helpful and I appreciate it.

Gypsy hugs