#1 Do you want to be right or, be happy?
#2 Behind every great man, is a woman rolling her eyes.
#3 If your dreams never scare you, they are too small.
#4 Never ever make yourself smaller so that others can be more comfortable.
#5 Your life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.
#6 Support bacteria! It's the only culture some people have.
#7 Refusing to go to the gym counts as resistance training right?
#8 Don't you just hate it when people answer their own questions? I do.
#9 The main difference between animals and humans, is the animals would never let the dumbest one lead the pack.
#10 If you ever get caught sleeping at work, slowly raise your head and say. "In Jesus name I pray".
#11 I asked my mom what is a couple?
She said 2 or 3.
I said, that's probably why dad divorced you.
And, number 12……..
What did the horse say after it fell?
Help! I've fallen, and I can't giddyup!
