Picture Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 250 "Butterfly Go My Way"Photograph Inspired Poems
11 total reviews
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
A delightful subject and presentation.
The style does present a challenge to say what you want
and keep the syllable count.
You have managed really well and the image is special.
:-) Shirley
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2016
A delightful subject and presentation.
The style does present a challenge to say what you want
and keep the syllable count.
You have managed really well and the image is special.
:-) Shirley
Comment Written 26-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2016
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Thank you Shirkey. I appreciate this wonderful feedback,
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Treischel,
"Butterfly Go My Way" is an excellent poem that adheres to the structure of the Nonet of increasing syllable count from one to nine. This poem has a good rhyme scheme of simple rhymes on alternate lines. It is written in good figurative language and flows well.
Your friend and colleague,
Preston
reply by the author on 25-Jul-2016
Hi, Treischel,
"Butterfly Go My Way" is an excellent poem that adheres to the structure of the Nonet of increasing syllable count from one to nine. This poem has a good rhyme scheme of simple rhymes on alternate lines. It is written in good figurative language and flows well.
Your friend and colleague,
Preston
Comment Written 25-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 25-Jul-2016
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Thank you Preston.
Comment from Pantygynt
I have to say some or even most of these short form syllabic poems are nothing much unless some other detail is added. Rhyme is the obvious one but it could some alliterative or onomatopoeic detail. This is something with the rhyme you have given it.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
I have to say some or even most of these short form syllabic poems are nothing much unless some other detail is added. Rhyme is the obvious one but it could some alliterative or onomatopoeic detail. This is something with the rhyme you have given it.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thank you Pantygynt. I totally agree with you. I like to add a little challenge.
Comment from RoostyNester
I love your nonet poem! It was very well done in style and rhyme of words. Very clever! You did great with your picture you took! It gave your poem a wonderful base to build on! Very nice. Some day I'm gonna try one of these poems. lol
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
I love your nonet poem! It was very well done in style and rhyme of words. Very clever! You did great with your picture you took! It gave your poem a wonderful base to build on! Very nice. Some day I'm gonna try one of these poems. lol
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thank you RoostyNester. Give one a go!
Comment from Joan E.
Ah, ha--here's the butterfly ensemble I've been awaiting. I like your choice of the nonet form--rather like a butterfly wing--and your informative notes about the Swallowtail variety, plus your parallel colors. I am glad this "bug" went "your way"! Smiles- Joan
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
Ah, ha--here's the butterfly ensemble I've been awaiting. I like your choice of the nonet form--rather like a butterfly wing--and your informative notes about the Swallowtail variety, plus your parallel colors. I am glad this "bug" went "your way"! Smiles- Joan
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thank you Joan. I hope it was worth waiting for.
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Yes, indeed--maybe you do a series, if you can find more specimens! -J
Comment from Aqua2021
Thank you for sharing this poem! It was a fun read. Although I do understand each line has a specific number for syllables, I felt some lines were missing a word such as, "Getting a pose was hard." When I was reading it, the flow seemed to have disconcerted. Maybe, " Getting a pose was really hard, " ? Just an idea. Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
Thank you for sharing this poem! It was a fun read. Although I do understand each line has a specific number for syllables, I felt some lines were missing a word such as, "Getting a pose was hard." When I was reading it, the flow seemed to have disconcerted. Maybe, " Getting a pose was really hard, " ? Just an idea. Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thank you Aqua. That's the thing with formatted poetry. Sometimes you need to eliminate words but still convey the thought.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
That is a pretty butterfly. I don't blame you for wanting to capture it's image. They are very timid though. Excellent nonet Tom. I think you did a good job on it. xx Nancy
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
That is a pretty butterfly. I don't blame you for wanting to capture it's image. They are very timid though. Excellent nonet Tom. I think you did a good job on it. xx Nancy
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thank you Nancy.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Yellow swallowtails are beautiful butterflies, Tom. While the males are always yellow, the females may be yellow or black. Females also have a splash or bit of iridescent blue wash on their tales. The one you've captured here in your stunning photo and written a poem about looks to be a male.
Tiger Swallowtails are often seen flying high over thick woodland areas and nearby streams. We've got lots of that here in Ohio. The males prefer their yellow female counterparts, but the black form of the female is less attractive to predators. So, naturally, they live longer and there are more of them to go around.
Still, their average life span is only about two weeks. Can you imagine a butterfly's bucket list?
1) Find a mate
2) Mate
3) lay larvae
4) die
We have quite a few of them around these parts because of all the honeysuckle that grows abundantly. Their favorite nectar plants are honeysuckle, milkweeds, azaleas, thistles and a few other urban flowers.
Great writing, and a fabulous photo to accompany it.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
Yellow swallowtails are beautiful butterflies, Tom. While the males are always yellow, the females may be yellow or black. Females also have a splash or bit of iridescent blue wash on their tales. The one you've captured here in your stunning photo and written a poem about looks to be a male.
Tiger Swallowtails are often seen flying high over thick woodland areas and nearby streams. We've got lots of that here in Ohio. The males prefer their yellow female counterparts, but the black form of the female is less attractive to predators. So, naturally, they live longer and there are more of them to go around.
Still, their average life span is only about two weeks. Can you imagine a butterfly's bucket list?
1) Find a mate
2) Mate
3) lay larvae
4) die
We have quite a few of them around these parts because of all the honeysuckle that grows abundantly. Their favorite nectar plants are honeysuckle, milkweeds, azaleas, thistles and a few other urban flowers.
Great writing, and a fabulous photo to accompany it.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Stank you Dean. You are so clever to sign my review with a yellow Swallowtail. I am smiling ear to ear.
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Oh, the pleasure's all mine, Tom.
You might say I'm a frustrated entomologist, lol.
Great writing.
Comment from I am Cat
****second edit changed rating to five stars*****
Well done and beautifully so, Tom!
Cat
HI Tom,
nice rhymes in this, but I count some discrepancies in syllable counts, correct me if I'm wrong, ok?)
Yellow Swallowtail was chased today. (9)
When spotted, it just flew away. (8)
Zigged & zagged o'er the yard. (6, o'er is one syllable, why not keep it 'over')
Getting a pose was hard. (6)
Its marks were why, (4)
just had to try. (4)
Butterfly (3)
go my (2)
way. (1)
I'm sure you'll fix it up quickly, let me know when you do, and I"ll be more than happy to change it to a five!
Beautiful photograph! good luck in the contest!
Cat
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
****second edit changed rating to five stars*****
Well done and beautifully so, Tom!
Cat
HI Tom,
nice rhymes in this, but I count some discrepancies in syllable counts, correct me if I'm wrong, ok?)
Yellow Swallowtail was chased today. (9)
When spotted, it just flew away. (8)
Zigged & zagged o'er the yard. (6, o'er is one syllable, why not keep it 'over')
Getting a pose was hard. (6)
Its marks were why, (4)
just had to try. (4)
Butterfly (3)
go my (2)
way. (1)
I'm sure you'll fix it up quickly, let me know when you do, and I"ll be more than happy to change it to a five!
Beautiful photograph! good luck in the contest!
Cat
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thanks Cat. I got lost in scaling the shape. Fixed it now.
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Great job, I knew you would. (I do that half the time) lol ;)
I've edited the rating. ;) Hugs
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:-)
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A beautiful structured Nonet. The butterfly seems beautiful and the effort you took to take the photo was worthwhile. I enjoyed the interesting author notes on the Eastern Yellow Tiger Swallowtail.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
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reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
A beautiful structured Nonet. The butterfly seems beautiful and the effort you took to take the photo was worthwhile. I enjoyed the interesting author notes on the Eastern Yellow Tiger Swallowtail.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2016
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Thank you Sandra. Yup, it's often hard to get my subjects to pose.