Sins of My Father
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "Stupid Boy"A coming of age story.
15 total reviews
Comment from Sankey
Poor Rory huh. In the whatever yet again. Some m ore good reading and more true to life than anyone can imagine huh!
Thanks again and no spags.
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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Poor Rory huh. In the whatever yet again. Some m ore good reading and more true to life than anyone can imagine huh!
Thanks again and no spags.
Comment Written 14-May-2014
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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Thank you for the wonderful review. Gretchen
Comment from Zue65
This story is a typical story of father-son relationship, each one trying to outdo one another. The son trying to seek attention by doing crazy little mischiefs like switching on the fire alarm, to elicit secrets from a secretive Dad. I love the play emotions in your story. Well done.
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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This story is a typical story of father-son relationship, each one trying to outdo one another. The son trying to seek attention by doing crazy little mischiefs like switching on the fire alarm, to elicit secrets from a secretive Dad. I love the play emotions in your story. Well done.
Comment Written 14-May-2014
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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Thank you for the wonderful review. Gretchen
Comment from Spiritual Echo
What a perfect ending for a chapter!
I'm not so sure I'd hit the brakes before swacking him across the head, but glad I'm into a two paragraph pattern so I can see if dad gives him his own scar.
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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What a perfect ending for a chapter!
I'm not so sure I'd hit the brakes before swacking him across the head, but glad I'm into a two paragraph pattern so I can see if dad gives him his own scar.
Comment Written 13-May-2014
reply by the author on 28-May-2014
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Thank you for the great review and the nice comments. Gretchen
Comment from lancellot
Great chapter, and yes that is just how the mind of a young teen works. One bad choice follows another and another, and usually because they don't want to be honest. It looks like it's time for an old fashioned belt meats butt time.
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Great chapter, and yes that is just how the mind of a young teen works. One bad choice follows another and another, and usually because they don't want to be honest. It looks like it's time for an old fashioned belt meats butt time.
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Rory is certainly on a roll with the bad choices. LOL. thank you for the great review. Gretchen
Comment from Donald O. Cassidy
yES, rORY'S ACTION IN SETTING OFF THE FIRE ALARM WAS DUMB AND INDEFENSEIBLE.
yOUR ENDING OF THIS CHAPATER IS NEAT: tO rORY'S QUESTION OF WHETHER HIS DAD EVR DID DUMB THINGS, dAD IS NOT ALERT IN DRIVING AND HAS TO HIT THE BRAKES.
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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yES, rORY'S ACTION IN SETTING OFF THE FIRE ALARM WAS DUMB AND INDEFENSEIBLE.
yOUR ENDING OF THIS CHAPATER IS NEAT: tO rORY'S QUESTION OF WHETHER HIS DAD EVR DID DUMB THINGS, dAD IS NOT ALERT IN DRIVING AND HAS TO HIT THE BRAKES.
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Thank you for the great review and the nice comments. Gretchen
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi GWHARGIS,
Mama mia. Rule One: when you're in a hole, stop digging. Rule One A: Don't take the backhoe in with you! Rory has just talked himself into a sinkhole is my reading of this. Were he my son, he'd be in for a serious talk. Very serious ... Which I suspect he's about to get.
Nicely written. Though I haven't read any of the previous story, I found I could identify with the boy's state of mind. Things are obviously not going well in his relationships with anyone, and it looks like they're about to get worse. I'm guessing 'single parent' situation and a father working his butt off to provide - so not a lot of time for his son's needs.
Well done, now I'll have to go back and read to find out if I've guessed right.
Patrick
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Hi GWHARGIS,
Mama mia. Rule One: when you're in a hole, stop digging. Rule One A: Don't take the backhoe in with you! Rory has just talked himself into a sinkhole is my reading of this. Were he my son, he'd be in for a serious talk. Very serious ... Which I suspect he's about to get.
Nicely written. Though I haven't read any of the previous story, I found I could identify with the boy's state of mind. Things are obviously not going well in his relationships with anyone, and it looks like they're about to get worse. I'm guessing 'single parent' situation and a father working his butt off to provide - so not a lot of time for his son's needs.
Well done, now I'll have to go back and read to find out if I've guessed right.
Patrick
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Most teenagers don't have much in the way of common sense. LOL. Thank you for the great review. Gretchen
Comment from nancy_e_davis
your lunch tray before you put it o[on] the counter?"
Oh, oh, Trouble on the horizon. Just when it was getting serious.
"How 'bout we talk about the dumb things I did when you get a call from the school and have to leave work to deal with it."
Did you get the you and I turned around in this sentence? It just didn't make sense to me.
It was stupid. Can't wait to see what's nest. Nancy
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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your lunch tray before you put it o[on] the counter?"
Oh, oh, Trouble on the horizon. Just when it was getting serious.
"How 'bout we talk about the dumb things I did when you get a call from the school and have to leave work to deal with it."
Did you get the you and I turned around in this sentence? It just didn't make sense to me.
It was stupid. Can't wait to see what's nest. Nancy
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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No, the you and I are supposed to be switched. Dean is telling his son, he'll explain his own mistakes when Rory loses time from work over them. Rory is not a great bad boy. Thank you for the great review. Happy Mother's Day. Gretchen
Comment from c_lucas
Back talking to a parents is not the healthiest of moves. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Back talking to a parents is not the healthiest of moves. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Thank you for the great review. Gretchen
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You're welcome, Gretchen. Charlie
Comment from Rosalyne
Hi Gretchen.
This is a great chapter that really shows Rory's inner struggle to shed his "good boy" image. You described this well with the fire alarm. You continued to build the tension between Rory and his father, speaking in a defiant way and his father's reaction. Well done.
Bye
Rosalyne :)
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Hi Gretchen.
This is a great chapter that really shows Rory's inner struggle to shed his "good boy" image. You described this well with the fire alarm. You continued to build the tension between Rory and his father, speaking in a defiant way and his father's reaction. Well done.
Bye
Rosalyne :)
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Thank you for the wonderful review. Gretchen
Comment from padumachitta
Hi. Ah Rory. Nope, fire alarm is stupid not cool. He doesn't have the street smarts to be cool. His dad has actually brought him up ok.
Maybe he'll learn he's a good guy
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Hi. Ah Rory. Nope, fire alarm is stupid not cool. He doesn't have the street smarts to be cool. His dad has actually brought him up ok.
Maybe he'll learn he's a good guy
Comment Written 11-May-2014
reply by the author on 11-May-2014
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Image is everything in the early teens. Thank you for the great review. Gretchen
