Alone
free verse47 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This short free verse really does emit that lonely vibe. I'm glad you let us know that it is just art and not your suicide note we're reading. It is nicely phrased to form the sense of despair.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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This short free verse really does emit that lonely vibe. I'm glad you let us know that it is just art and not your suicide note we're reading. It is nicely phrased to form the sense of despair.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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thank you for the great review.
Comment from LoannaLois
In so few words you gave an accounting of this woman and her struggle to live. It is sad yet beautiful. This was well-written.the illustration got to me, too.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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In so few words you gave an accounting of this woman and her struggle to live. It is sad yet beautiful. This was well-written.the illustration got to me, too.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014
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thank you for the great review.
Comment from yarnteller
The harsh reality of being alone can be extremely devastating to say the least. You write a very vivid scenario of the depths a person can go from utter despair. Nicely done and good luck to you.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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The harsh reality of being alone can be extremely devastating to say the least. You write a very vivid scenario of the depths a person can go from utter despair. Nicely done and good luck to you.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thanks for the great review.
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the picture. I love the poem. I am a widow. I understand the poem. The death of your loved one makes you feel dead too. You feel like you are sentenced to solitary confinement. Life is never the same. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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I love the picture. I love the poem. I am a widow. I understand the poem. The death of your loved one makes you feel dead too. You feel like you are sentenced to solitary confinement. Life is never the same. Great work. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thanks for the kind review.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Well, this was certainly deeply depressing, but many times we do feel this way. When we lose a loved one -- our spouse -- to a divorce, or death, our lives are forever changed. Should we be unfortunate enough to lose a child before we ourselves go, life seems to stop, and all the joy we once found in it seems insignificant.
Loss is not always a part of finding ourselves, but mostly about losing small bits and pieces of our broken spirit along life's cosmic highways and byways.
Nicely written free verse, and it certainly speaks to the topic of loneliness.
Good luck to you in the contest.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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Well, this was certainly deeply depressing, but many times we do feel this way. When we lose a loved one -- our spouse -- to a divorce, or death, our lives are forever changed. Should we be unfortunate enough to lose a child before we ourselves go, life seems to stop, and all the joy we once found in it seems insignificant.
Loss is not always a part of finding ourselves, but mostly about losing small bits and pieces of our broken spirit along life's cosmic highways and byways.
Nicely written free verse, and it certainly speaks to the topic of loneliness.
Good luck to you in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thanks for the great review and the good luck wishes.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Lovinia
Hi Mystery Poet
Solemn, poignant. I love your contrast lines ...
"in a house
(no longer called a home)"
... to me this conveys loneliness to its full dept. It emphasises, the 'void'. All lost ... Your poem on its own would probably make me think of an elderly person, deserted by family, no friends left ... ill and unable to participate in life ... just waiting for the end.
You have selected an image of a young person feeling at life's end. Not uncommon in this time ... personal fulfilment seems to elude far too many. No hints in your poem as to the circumstances ... you leave the reader to draw their own conclusion or ponder the mystery of that young woman's life .... and her current non-life. So deeply moving and a depth f sadness ... what makes it worse is that she suffers so alone. Excellent free verse.
Another fine entry for this contest. I wish you the best of luck. Warmest regards - Lovinia xoxo
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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Hi Mystery Poet
Solemn, poignant. I love your contrast lines ...
"in a house
(no longer called a home)"
... to me this conveys loneliness to its full dept. It emphasises, the 'void'. All lost ... Your poem on its own would probably make me think of an elderly person, deserted by family, no friends left ... ill and unable to participate in life ... just waiting for the end.
You have selected an image of a young person feeling at life's end. Not uncommon in this time ... personal fulfilment seems to elude far too many. No hints in your poem as to the circumstances ... you leave the reader to draw their own conclusion or ponder the mystery of that young woman's life .... and her current non-life. So deeply moving and a depth f sadness ... what makes it worse is that she suffers so alone. Excellent free verse.
Another fine entry for this contest. I wish you the best of luck. Warmest regards - Lovinia xoxo
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thank you Lovina for the kind and heartfelt review.
Comment from RodG
This narrative poem is so stark and bleak. You set the scene very well, allowing us to see this person sitting in a stripped down room alone awaiting death. We wonder if he/she is suicidal or if the room is empty NOW because he/she has a terminal disease and is getting rid of stuff so others don't have to. You evoke pathos and that is the mark of a good poem.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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This narrative poem is so stark and bleak. You set the scene very well, allowing us to see this person sitting in a stripped down room alone awaiting death. We wonder if he/she is suicidal or if the room is empty NOW because he/she has a terminal disease and is getting rid of stuff so others don't have to. You evoke pathos and that is the mark of a good poem.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thank you for the great review.
Comment from rouskin
Very powerful entry:Alone, I await my death passing the time
that I once called life but I no longer live. Best of luck in the contest Memorable entry I'm going to vote for you
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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Very powerful entry:Alone, I await my death passing the time
that I once called life but I no longer live. Best of luck in the contest Memorable entry I'm going to vote for you
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thanks for the great review and good luck wishes.
Comment from seren james
A very poignant poem about loneliness. Your words evoke the sense of the meaning of the poem. Presentation is excellent. The grey colour adds to the greyness of mood.
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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A very poignant poem about loneliness. Your words evoke the sense of the meaning of the poem. Presentation is excellent. The grey colour adds to the greyness of mood.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thank you for the great review.
Comment from STEPHEN A CARTER
stripped 'stripped' = very powerful image
of OLD photos
in a house
(no longer called a home) Poignant indeed
devoid of souvenirs Good use of 'devoid'
of the life I once lived.
passing the time
that I once called life
THAT I no longer
live.
Suggestions only. No disrespect intended. Loved the pis..black and white seemed more suited to the poem as the light comes in from left to right highlighting her serene face. As to the young woman..what a waste..cigarette and all.
Regards:
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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stripped 'stripped' = very powerful image
of OLD photos
in a house
(no longer called a home) Poignant indeed
devoid of souvenirs Good use of 'devoid'
of the life I once lived.
passing the time
that I once called life
THAT I no longer
live.
Suggestions only. No disrespect intended. Loved the pis..black and white seemed more suited to the poem as the light comes in from left to right highlighting her serene face. As to the young woman..what a waste..cigarette and all.
Regards:
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 21-Apr-2014
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thank you
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Dear ANON: Loved the piece for its potrayal of despair. I had stage 4 cancer 17 years ago and went through hell. However I must say that loneliness is far worse. Do drop by sometime. Just posted 2 new poems. Thanks.
With Respect: Steve C
