Comment from nelliesellie

Excellent

Many people feel the past generations are to be revered. We realize life is short. Sometimes we are too busy establishing our lives'. We know we will become part of the past generations. Great work.

 Comment Written 02-May-2014

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reply by the author on 02-May-2014

I am delighted you saw so much meaning in my poem. Thank you for sharing.

Comment from MissMerri

Excellent

Such a great metaphor you've used here! I really like this poem. I like how you use concrete examples of sparks and fleeting light and then relate that so neatly to a fleeting life. You even added the perfect moral... Don't procrastinate. It seemed like a dash of ironic humor to me, which made the poem all the more appealing. Rhymes and meter are just right too. Well done.

 Comment Written 01-May-2014

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reply by the author on 01-May-2014

Such a welcome review and response to this poem, MissMerri. I truly appreciate your wonderful praise.

Comment from reconciled

Excellent

Beautiful write...always impressive. ....you are on steroids....there is no other explanation....-smile-....great stuff mike....love ya man Michael

 Comment Written 25-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 25-Apr-2014

Thank you for your very kind praise, Michael. I am delighted you like the poem.

Comment from Connie P

Good

I absolutely loved the poem. Very descriptive and with one exception, it has a great rhythm. The second line in stanza 2 threw the count off. Otherwise, great!
Connie

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014

Thank you for sharing my poem, Connie, and your review. I am a bit confused by what you mean by "threw the count off." What are you counting?

reply by Connie P on 24-Apr-2014

So sorry, I should have made myself more clear. The entire poem except that one line has a cadence da dum da dum da dum, etc., then the one line stands out (to me at least) and breaks the rhythm. The only suggestion I can make is to tighten this line a bit, maybe see how it flows without the word "mighty".

reply by the author on 24-Apr-2014

I know what you are referring to now. Thank you. Yes, I sometimes have a penchant for sacrificing the rhythm for the rhyme. Indeed the poem is primarily written in iambic, but for the sake of the rhyme in lines 2 & 4 I shifted briefly to trochaic. I suppose I could justify doing this by saying the change breaks up the sing-songiness. RodG

Comment from 1954speed

Excellent

A good rhythm and thoughtful message. Was a pleasant read about some things not usually associated together but brought to one in the final stanza. Thanks

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014

Thank you so much for sharing my poem and your review.

Comment from Lothlorien

Excellent

This poem flows well, and the rhymes seem natural, not forced. I really like how it descibes the shooting stars, because I really enjoy watching meteor showers.

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014

I am always delighted when a reader enjoys the "flow" of the poem as well as its content. Thank you for sharing.

Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

good use of abcb rhyming
excellent use of enjambment
vivid detail of setting
nice touch of alliteration in hefty hammer
effective simile with the lightning bugs
a compelling message in your closing
Brooke

 Comment Written 12-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 12-Apr-2014

Thank you, Brooke, for sharing and your wonderful commentary.

Comment from akulkumol

Excellent

Beautiful poem mixed with beauty of the night sky and the legends of mythology, so many thoughts flooded the mind along with the showering shooting stars. Loved reading it and thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 09-Apr-2014

Thank you for sharing "Shooting Stars" and your kind praise.

Comment from royowen

Excellent

I love this, written inspiringly about the shortness of life, not letting life pass you by before you actually make a difference! I love the metaphorical shooting stars and lightning bugs to emphasise the narrative! Well done, good write, blessings, Roy.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 09-Apr-2014

So pleased you enjoyed this poem and am pleased my message was so clear. Thanks for sharing.

Comment from El Coyote

Excellent

What a wonderful blend of history, mythology and imagery. The poem had great rhyme and meter and ended with some sound advice. Well done.

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 09-Apr-2014

Thank you so much for sharing this poem and your kind praise.