Spring and Fall by Angelika King
Is a poem describing dirfferences between spring and fall.2 total reviews
Comment from RodG
I like this poem and I believe I do "get your intent" from just the images alone.
I especially like your using "tearing" (meaning tears we shed while crying) as a verb. I might suggest changing line 3 slightly to: Each season's mirror, as both seasons reflect a mood or change.
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I like this poem and I believe I do "get your intent" from just the images alone.
I especially like your using "tearing" (meaning tears we shed while crying) as a verb. I might suggest changing line 3 slightly to: Each season's mirror, as both seasons reflect a mood or change.
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
Comment from healfromwithin
"Spring and Fall by Angelika King" - not sure why you gave a Haiku a title (authentic Japanese Haiku don't use them) or why the "by Angelika King" is included in it. ?
The overall piece seems disconnected; usually, Haiku is about a single theme, most often about nature.
Haiku generally does not use punctuation.
I have some notes on Haiku on my profile page. (My husband is Japanese; my first few writing instructors were Asian; the Haiku is used widely in Hawaii, where I live.)
Thanks for your work.
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"Spring and Fall by Angelika King" - not sure why you gave a Haiku a title (authentic Japanese Haiku don't use them) or why the "by Angelika King" is included in it. ?
The overall piece seems disconnected; usually, Haiku is about a single theme, most often about nature.
Haiku generally does not use punctuation.
I have some notes on Haiku on my profile page. (My husband is Japanese; my first few writing instructors were Asian; the Haiku is used widely in Hawaii, where I live.)
Thanks for your work.
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
