Savannah Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 76 "CHAPTER SIXTEEN, PART THREE"Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?
48 total reviews
Comment from Ben Colder
I love good dialog and you make it happen. Not many cats are found near where these restaurants are in our area. The photo makes me hungry. Watch out for British spoof who hates American dialog. Egg rolls my favorite. Blessings to you this fine morning.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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I love good dialog and you make it happen. Not many cats are found near where these restaurants are in our area. The photo makes me hungry. Watch out for British spoof who hates American dialog. Egg rolls my favorite. Blessings to you this fine morning.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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I have a few reviewers who hate dialogue. I have mentioned to them maybe since they don't like my writing, they shouldn't review me. Thank you for the kind review.
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Years past when a student at long Ridge Writers College, two time Pulitzer Prize winner and my tutor Professor Jon Franklin pointed out some things a good writer does. I wish to compliment you on using several. The one that stuck in my mind concerning you write was the Police Chief wiped his hands after shaking hands with your character. Very good grabber. Shalom my author friend. I hope the six stars will help keep your avg, the way you wish.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Wow, Barbara! You sure are coming down on Georgians. I don't believe I've met any Savannah residents who have never eaten at a buffet - Chinese is no different than any other kind, procedure-wise. Heck, I lived in Statesboro (talk about a pothole in the road) and the folks weren't that unsophisticated. You may want to revise a bit. :) nancy
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Wow, Barbara! You sure are coming down on Georgians. I don't believe I've met any Savannah residents who have never eaten at a buffet - Chinese is no different than any other kind, procedure-wise. Heck, I lived in Statesboro (talk about a pothole in the road) and the folks weren't that unsophisticated. You may want to revise a bit. :) nancy
Comment Written 30-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Billy Joe is a special case. I have met a few people who have never eaten Chinese food. Thank you for the kind review.
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But they all eat at fish camps and other buffet-style restaurants. Savannah is full of them, especially for Sunday brunch. Well, you know your characters... :D Nancy
Comment from Zue65
I don,t mind the dialogue, it is perfectly okay with me, it reinforced your message and helped to carry forward your story. The ending put the readers on edge and I look forward to finding out what exactly happened to Paige. God bless.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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I don,t mind the dialogue, it is perfectly okay with me, it reinforced your message and helped to carry forward your story. The ending put the readers on edge and I look forward to finding out what exactly happened to Paige. God bless.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from James Dooney
Oh it reads like the coppers are protecting the guilty !!! WOuld not be the first time I am sure ! Good write up ! Well done !
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Oh it reads like the coppers are protecting the guilty !!! WOuld not be the first time I am sure ! Good write up ! Well done !
Comment Written 30-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, barbara, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where the gang goes out for lunch and when they get back, paige is attacked. i enjoyed reading it
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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this is very well written, barbara, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where the gang goes out for lunch and when they get back, paige is attacked. i enjoyed reading it
Comment Written 30-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review and dropping by,
Comment from angelface2
Wow this was an exciting chapter. I can see I will have to go back and start at the beginning. which I haven't had time today, yet. Nice writing. Miss Sally
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Wow this was an exciting chapter. I can see I will have to go back and start at the beginning. which I haven't had time today, yet. Nice writing. Miss Sally
Comment Written 29-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from tango494
I've missed reading your work. I always find your dialogues to be very real and relate-able. I've not read your previous post for this work but this portion was as amazing as always. I will do my best to find time to go back and catch up. Another awesome job!!!!
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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I've missed reading your work. I always find your dialogues to be very real and relate-able. I've not read your previous post for this work but this portion was as amazing as always. I will do my best to find time to go back and catch up. Another awesome job!!!!
Comment Written 29-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review and dropping by. I'm glad you're back.
Comment from elgone
The police are doing a little more than looking out for Walker, they are complicit in looking the other way. Good set up for the ending. For your revisions, I have a couple of comments. You may want to explain what an Outside Kitchen is, maybe earlier in the book. Unless people are used to reading historical fiction they may not understand that. Also, int he last section you do something I have noticed before. There is a slight interruption in the flow, jumping in time here from being at the restaurant to being back at the house. The reader needs a brief transitional statement at least, a couple of sentences or something to get the characters between scenes. That'll be pretty easy when you revise this. The important part is getting the plot and the storyline right. The details can be file din later.
E
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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The police are doing a little more than looking out for Walker, they are complicit in looking the other way. Good set up for the ending. For your revisions, I have a couple of comments. You may want to explain what an Outside Kitchen is, maybe earlier in the book. Unless people are used to reading historical fiction they may not understand that. Also, int he last section you do something I have noticed before. There is a slight interruption in the flow, jumping in time here from being at the restaurant to being back at the house. The reader needs a brief transitional statement at least, a couple of sentences or something to get the characters between scenes. That'll be pretty easy when you revise this. The important part is getting the plot and the storyline right. The details can be file din later.
E
Comment Written 29-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review. I will take another look at those areas. I thought I had explained an outside kitchen in an earlier chapter, like chapter 3, but I will double check.
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Maybe I forgot about chapter three by now. But if you did it should be fine. Once the entire book is recombined and ready over a one or two day period, it will flow much better.
E
Comment from lindalcreel
Well we weren't expecting that. How can anybody be so stupid? Don't they know that Cash and the others are waiting in the car? This was a great way to end the chapter, leaving everyone wondering who is trying to abduct or hurt Paige. So many people to choose from, she will never realize who all of her enemies are.
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Well we weren't expecting that. How can anybody be so stupid? Don't they know that Cash and the others are waiting in the car? This was a great way to end the chapter, leaving everyone wondering who is trying to abduct or hurt Paige. So many people to choose from, she will never realize who all of her enemies are.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Thank you for the kind review. LOL
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So welcome:)
Comment from Sankey
Hmmm good to see you back. hope you had a great Christmas...we didn't but story for another time. Another good chapter thanks again. I missed ya.
I might be wrong on some of the following let me know. The back outside kitchen thing threw me.
When Cash returned from putting the puppy "in the back outside kitchen," Possible spag? Understand if I am wrong ok.
stuck it in hi(s)m mouth. "Hmmm, much better."
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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Hmmm good to see you back. hope you had a great Christmas...we didn't but story for another time. Another good chapter thanks again. I missed ya.
I might be wrong on some of the following let me know. The back outside kitchen thing threw me.
When Cash returned from putting the puppy "in the back outside kitchen," Possible spag? Understand if I am wrong ok.
stuck it in hi(s)m mouth. "Hmmm, much better."
Comment Written 29-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2013
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The old plantations in the south used to have their kitchens separate from the rest of the house because of the heat and in some cases to keep the slaves away. Thank you for the kind review.
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I was gonna say something about the slave element re separate kitchen thanks for the heads up.
