Reviews from

Savannah Love

Viewing comments for Chapter 68 "CHAPTER 14: PART FIVE"
Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?

63 total reviews 
Comment from Allen Wolfe
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While reading this, I felt as if I were a fly on the wall, observing this very life-like scene develop. You present characters teeming with depth and a story that is difficult not to follow. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2013

Comment from Dean Kuch
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Hey, Barbara,

Old Cash is a man after my own heart. He's not only a true gentleman in the trendiest of Southern traditions, but he backs it up with strong morals and aa engaging, light hearted nature.

Paige n the other hand seems to me to be a bit of a drama queen. I feel she overreacted to the whole situation with Cash, but I know a lot of women who are just like her.

Your characters are extremely well developed. The dialogue between them is crisp and engaging. it's also very realistic, I felt as though I was sitting right there, listening to their conversation.

Another fabulous chapter, Barbara!

Well done

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2013

Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
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A wonderful story my friend. Now we finally found out what Cash did all night long. I felt as if I were right in the middle of it. Great imagery

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2013

Comment from irishauthorme
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Went back and read from chapter 63, the last place I reviewed. I am pleasantly surprised by the romantic turn in your story, and the provocative pictures you chose. Really spiced your story up and brought out the human instinct factor that was hiding there. And hey, your picture of the doggy offering flowers was great.
Will try and keep up now.
irish

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013

Comment from Mishelly
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was my favourite post so far. I loved the dialogue between Cash and Paige. There was so much heat and tension, and parts of it was so funny. Cash is such a gentleman, and Paige is one feisty lady. Together they are a good match :-)

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013

Comment from abbasjoy
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

What a gentleman Cash is, I am so proud of him. Not that I expected any less from him, as he said that was the way he was raised. That's the way it should be. No hanky panky before the wedding.
I love how tender he responds to Paige. He knows her very well, and how active her imagination is.
Finally we see the feelings come to light.
Love this post.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013

Comment from Nanette Mary
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Hullo Barbara Wilkey ....

I have read this rather short chapter with interest and the only change to suggest is your two words ...
"We good?" That is not grammatically correct nor do I imagine that any well-spoken person would say those words as you have them.
Now I look forward to your next chapter.
Love from ..... Nanette Mary.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013

Comment from TamzinWhite
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I haven't read any of the other chapters and I want to. I like the way the dialogue propels the reader. It is clear. Concise. I love it because it is chaste and true and I love the twists at the end of the chapter.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013

Comment from allborn66
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This was a very fun chapter. You handled the conflict well. The interaction is believable. The dialogue sounded natural.
Barbara

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013

Comment from Mastery
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Hi, Barbara. Another very well written chapter here. Your plot continues to flow nicely and the images are very well portrayed for the most part:

"Cash put his finger over her lips. "Because that's how I was raised and that's who I am." He removed his finger, put his arms around her, and his lips tenderly met hers"


"Paige tightly yanked the ties of her white terrycloth bathrobe." (I think this may be an oversight on your part as you are familiar with the rule about not using adverbs to support your action. (tightly) Perhaps "Paige snugged the ties on her terrycloth robe."


I can't picture this part, Barb: "Paige wrinkled her nose and plopped on the bed. "You still need to tell me where you spent the night and why you left." How does one wrinkle their nose? How about she rolled her eyes instead?

Good write overall for sure. Bob

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2013