~Right Down the Drain~
How are your pipes?65 total reviews
Comment from GWHARGIS
I think what makes this truly scary is that this is based loosely on actual events. Pretty gross and your descriptions of the gore were over the top and very vivid. Nice job on this. You have now added unclogging the drain to my list of nightmare inducing events. LOL.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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I think what makes this truly scary is that this is based loosely on actual events. Pretty gross and your descriptions of the gore were over the top and very vivid. Nice job on this. You have now added unclogging the drain to my list of nightmare inducing events. LOL.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thanks, GW, I truly appreciate it.
Sometimes, truth is far more frightening than fiction, isn't it?
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hi Dean, Now I know why Stan and I got rid of our garbage disposal just to think someone could lived in this old home we bought was a lunatic.
Your story is horror-plus and your notes about
Ed Kemper.
Gert
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Hi Dean, Now I know why Stan and I got rid of our garbage disposal just to think someone could lived in this old home we bought was a lunatic.
Your story is horror-plus and your notes about
Ed Kemper.
Gert
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Hah, thanks, Gert, but let's hope not!
I really appreciate the fantastic review, and all those shining yellow stars...WOW!
Comment from cinderbella
Here you go, had to give you that six for this one. This held my attention from the first word to the last, and I was almost holding my breath throughout.
One tiny, tiny thing. "They were well-aware of the 'sorted' history behind the home." I think you meant 'sordid' ???
The author notes were as chilling as the fiction, but then truth often is. I love the way you threw in the call to Charlie Manson. The pics, the sound effects, all perfect. :) Sandra
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Here you go, had to give you that six for this one. This held my attention from the first word to the last, and I was almost holding my breath throughout.
One tiny, tiny thing. "They were well-aware of the 'sorted' history behind the home." I think you meant 'sordid' ???
The author notes were as chilling as the fiction, but then truth often is. I love the way you threw in the call to Charlie Manson. The pics, the sound effects, all perfect. :) Sandra
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thanks, Bella! I took care of that typo, and I sure do appreciate your read and review of this!
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is another very dark and disturbing story that the author has created with this piece of writing. I never tire of reading these macabre stories.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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This is another very dark and disturbing story that the author has created with this piece of writing. I never tire of reading these macabre stories.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thank you very much, Tomes. I certainly appreciate your support, and I'm glad you enjoy these types of stories...
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I do indeed.
Comment from JM daSilva
A gruesome and great tale that will make people afraid of sinks, which is great. This is the essence of horror, making people afraid of seemingly simple things.
Spag suggestions.
James Preston stood in front of the kitchen counter(remove , pounding) a meaty fist upon the
"I'm gonna(remove ') ream that real estate agent's ass, first chance I get!" he bellowed.
"You pay sixty-eight thousand dollars for a house,(.) what do you expect, Jim, the Taj Mahal?
"Jim was fuming now, the veins bulging from his neck, taught (taut) and rigid. Like newly laid
Son of a... "I'm gonna(remove ') get this cleared out if I have to dismantle this whole fuckin' sink to do it!" Jim Preston continued(remove , )pumping furiously with the plunger,
Said it was such a steal, too." Jim Preston continued the conversation with himself(remove ,) as he resumed his vigorous pumping at the clog in the drain.
free lance (freelance) photographer. They each made good money, her salary just slightly
higher than her husband's lately. Construction had slowed to a crawl.(;) However, there were
They were well aware of the sorted (sordid) history behind the home.
in the kitchen. The cops were alerted by an anonymous 911 call from one of the neighbors(,) who called to report gunshots. The police had busted the door down just as Mark Bishop was
The tub and disposal were replaced, of course, but the stories lingered. There was a tinge of (remove a) rotten odor in the master bath at times initially, but Jim had found a dead rat in
Still dazed from the bump to the head, France's hands find (found) the side of the slender
"Thank you, God," she muttered(remove . She) (and) slid them into place, taking in the scene
she saw them. Several gelatinous shapes, bright-red pin-points (pinpoints) in the places their
eyes should have been, looming over (a or on) top of her.
Country wagon(remove . He) (and) carried them to the latest construction site where Melvin
Manor. Tossing them into the pit(,) where the foundation of the first home was to be poured,
to prevent freezing (remove later on).
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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A gruesome and great tale that will make people afraid of sinks, which is great. This is the essence of horror, making people afraid of seemingly simple things.
Spag suggestions.
James Preston stood in front of the kitchen counter(remove , pounding) a meaty fist upon the
"I'm gonna(remove ') ream that real estate agent's ass, first chance I get!" he bellowed.
"You pay sixty-eight thousand dollars for a house,(.) what do you expect, Jim, the Taj Mahal?
"Jim was fuming now, the veins bulging from his neck, taught (taut) and rigid. Like newly laid
Son of a... "I'm gonna(remove ') get this cleared out if I have to dismantle this whole fuckin' sink to do it!" Jim Preston continued(remove , )pumping furiously with the plunger,
Said it was such a steal, too." Jim Preston continued the conversation with himself(remove ,) as he resumed his vigorous pumping at the clog in the drain.
free lance (freelance) photographer. They each made good money, her salary just slightly
higher than her husband's lately. Construction had slowed to a crawl.(;) However, there were
They were well aware of the sorted (sordid) history behind the home.
in the kitchen. The cops were alerted by an anonymous 911 call from one of the neighbors(,) who called to report gunshots. The police had busted the door down just as Mark Bishop was
The tub and disposal were replaced, of course, but the stories lingered. There was a tinge of (remove a) rotten odor in the master bath at times initially, but Jim had found a dead rat in
Still dazed from the bump to the head, France's hands find (found) the side of the slender
"Thank you, God," she muttered(remove . She) (and) slid them into place, taking in the scene
she saw them. Several gelatinous shapes, bright-red pin-points (pinpoints) in the places their
eyes should have been, looming over (a or on) top of her.
Country wagon(remove . He) (and) carried them to the latest construction site where Melvin
Manor. Tossing them into the pit(,) where the foundation of the first home was to be poured,
to prevent freezing (remove later on).
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thanks a bunch, my friend! I took care of the edits. I really appreciate all of your help with this one.
Most grateful!
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Great pleasure as always, my friend.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Sixty eight thousand dollar!! Where can you get
a house for that - maybe a garden shed or garage!!
OMG - now I know why - wouldn't get me near it, let
alone in it.
Shat a horrific story, Dean -- you should collect the horror stories in a book and call it FRIGHT
We had a garbage disposal, but when Colin gutted the kitchen to fit a new one, we done away with it... I
always thought it quite dangerous if you got careless.
["]Jim was fuming now, - lose inverted commas
Margaret
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Sixty eight thousand dollar!! Where can you get
a house for that - maybe a garden shed or garage!!
OMG - now I know why - wouldn't get me near it, let
alone in it.
Shat a horrific story, Dean -- you should collect the horror stories in a book and call it FRIGHT
We had a garbage disposal, but when Colin gutted the kitchen to fit a new one, we done away with it... I
always thought it quite dangerous if you got careless.
["]Jim was fuming now, - lose inverted commas
Margaret
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Thanks very much, Margret! I took care of those inverted quotation marks, thanks for pointing that out to me!
Comment from alexgeorge
Eweeeeuuuuu, that was gruesome, and very well written, grabbing abd retaining my interest foor the duration of the story. Well done, Dean. Still, I love your pictapoems most of all and am thirsty for another dousing.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Eweeeeuuuuu, that was gruesome, and very well written, grabbing abd retaining my interest foor the duration of the story. Well done, Dean. Still, I love your pictapoems most of all and am thirsty for another dousing.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Hah, thanks, Alex, I sure do appreciate you taking the time to read and review this one for me!
I'm glad you liked it, too, LOL...
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welcome :)
Comment from Cookie333
Okay, Dean now you have me officially freaked out. It would be just my luck to have a psycho living next door in this tiny little town...come to think of it, I already have neighbors like that, haahaa
thanks for a great read,
karen
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Okay, Dean now you have me officially freaked out. It would be just my luck to have a psycho living next door in this tiny little town...come to think of it, I already have neighbors like that, haahaa
thanks for a great read,
karen
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Oh, do you, now? Well, tell them "HELLO" for me. It's always nice to meet new people and make new friends, LOL...
Thanks for this excellent review, Cookie333...
Comment from lindalcreel
Wow, I loved the correlation between Bailey and Charles Manson, we all know what a sick ticket he was. I can still recall watching the network movie about what he did to Sharon Tate and the others. Let's hope that we have learned our lesson and this guy doesn't get paroled. Great read and perfect for Halloween. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Wow, I loved the correlation between Bailey and Charles Manson, we all know what a sick ticket he was. I can still recall watching the network movie about what he did to Sharon Tate and the others. Let's hope that we have learned our lesson and this guy doesn't get paroled. Great read and perfect for Halloween. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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And, I thank you for taking the time to read and review it for me, Linda. Always a pleasure!
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Welcome:)
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Loved the 10 lovable cat movie on the bottom. this was excellent. did not get a chance to read the piece but Thought the cat movie was a great addition.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Loved the 10 lovable cat movie on the bottom. this was excellent. did not get a chance to read the piece but Thought the cat movie was a great addition.
Comment Written 13-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2013
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Well, thanks, Barb, I'm glad you liked it. Those little movies sometimes make a huge difference. Then, there are those times...
Well, I'm glad it wasn't one of those times, heh-heh...
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Actually I did read it, and it was pure you
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:)
Ain't nobody quite like me, ha ha!
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Did you expect an argument on that?
