Reviews from

Savannah Love

Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "Chapter 8, part 3"
Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?

56 total reviews 
Comment from Maureen's Pen
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Hi Barbara, this is a great post. The disputed racism you penned with great skill. Made the reader feel the sorrow and stress of what Nala is feeling.
I liked that your characters banned together, it helped the reader feel part of the group.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Thank you for your kind words, one reviewer said Nala should have felt more stress and I didn't pull it off.
reply by Maureen's Pen on 18-Feb-2013
    No I think you were right. When that type of situation happens they are afraid to come forward. So I believe you penned it realistically. Nala dosn't want to rock the boat and is scared....and that type of bullying has deep roots. She may open up more later, but for now she worries of her and her children's safety as well as her job.

    To my mind, this is well done....and delivered what it needed. Hope that gives you a wee bit more to think over.
    Hugs
    Maureen
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Thank you, it does.
Comment from Cumbrianlass
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Hmm. Interesting hook at the end. I like how you explored the continuing racism in the South. Sad it still goes on.

Good post, Barbara. Only saw one wee nit:

"Exactly()what did he say?" - lose comma.

Hugs,

Av

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    I hate commas, and I have taken that one out. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from BethShelby
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It is sad that there are still many in the South who still believe that black people are inferior. I like the way your main character react to this prejudice. It sounds as through Dr. Walker is guilty of at least spying and maybe more.

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from cheyennewy
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Hi Barbara,

I wonder if Dr Walker is spying on Paige and also why would he do that? I can't blame Nala for not wanting anymore trouble and she is sure there will be if Cash and Billy Joe confront him. The conversations seem so natural and your characters are, as well. Well done....blessings, chey

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from nora arjuna
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nala is a servant but still she deserves respect and not be ridiculed. she can be a good friend to paige. another nice chapter. you may want to speed up the story's progress a bit.

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    I am considering speeding it up, but I am afraid I will be accused of rushing. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Norbanus
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You're doing an excellent job of moving the story along, Barbara. Cash is in a spot to pick up another piece of the conflict. Outstanding of showing the situation through dialogue.

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from kcross11
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receivers' coach(?) He

Black members of the football t... do you mean having black members on the football team, or the black members of the football team actually did the work to end the segregation? I wasn't sure what you meant here.

Very clean, and easy to read. I come in and out, so I haven't followed the storyline perfectly, but I always enjoy what I read.

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    I just changed that whole sentence. I added it at the last minute and it just didn't read right. I hope it reads better now. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Auroraboreal800
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Loved your very descriptive words in this nicely written piece. We're learning a lot about southern culture, in the pass... I guess.
Thanks Barbara, for posting this wonderful chapter.
:)

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Thank you for the kind reveiw.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
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Segregation is alive and well in some places in the South - and North - and everywhere else, Barbara. There were race riots in Statesville, NC in 1978. It took a joint effort by all the churches in the state to stop the Klan's overt intimidation of blacks and those who had more enlightened points of view. In some places (Statesboro, GA - the home of Georgia Southern University - for instance) those views persisted to my certain knowledge through 1992. Nala has every right to worry. Well done, Barbara. :) nancy

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    Where we were at in SC, a small town outside of Fort Jackson, race issues were still going on as late as 2004. I am pretty sure they still do. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Enrique28
Excellent
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It seems that the old house is not the only antebellum...
With some people the prewar mentality remains because for all intents and purposes it ended "fifty or sixty years ago"...
The story flows very nicely mostly with fine narrative.
Excellent writing!

 Comment Written 18-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2013
    You can't legislate what people think. Thank you for the kind review.