Edie and Princess
Hangin' on and lettin' go.44 total reviews
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I am a dog person, but the unproud owner of three cats. I will never undstand them, but I loved your story and yes, we do do strange things because of love.
"Why isprerogative always female?" (spacing issue with is)
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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I am a dog person, but the unproud owner of three cats. I will never undstand them, but I loved your story and yes, we do do strange things because of love.
"Why isprerogative always female?" (spacing issue with is)
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Actually, Barbara, I'm a dog person, too. But I have learned to appreciate the secret world of cats--mostly at the behest of others. The thing about cats which is different from dogs is, you can't hurt a cat's feelings. Thank you so much, Barbara. Peace, Lee
Comment from c_lucas
Cats can get away with bringing a mouse as a gift. HuMANs have to settle for Jewelry, Wine, Dinner, Or a new specialty to try out in the bedroom. This is very well written.
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reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Cats can get away with bringing a mouse as a gift. HuMANs have to settle for Jewelry, Wine, Dinner, Or a new specialty to try out in the bedroom. This is very well written.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Thank you so much, Charlie. Bringing a mouse home will earn you a mouse--under your right eye. I'm glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
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You have a point there. You're welcome.
Comment from Linda Lee
This is some seriously good writing. The voice is absolutely magnetic and draws you in from moment one. The overall sentiment is tragically wonderful too.
There isn't a lot in the way of suggestion that I'd have to offer, but I will say that the transitions were a little jumpy for my taste. The first one going into a flashback was fairly clear, the subsequent ones weren't as much. I mean, I 'got' it in the end, but I would have preferred being led into them rather than dumped.
But, as I said, this is seriously good writing overall so that wins the day for me.
Nice work, good luck in the contest!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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This is some seriously good writing. The voice is absolutely magnetic and draws you in from moment one. The overall sentiment is tragically wonderful too.
There isn't a lot in the way of suggestion that I'd have to offer, but I will say that the transitions were a little jumpy for my taste. The first one going into a flashback was fairly clear, the subsequent ones weren't as much. I mean, I 'got' it in the end, but I would have preferred being led into them rather than dumped.
But, as I said, this is seriously good writing overall so that wins the day for me.
Nice work, good luck in the contest!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Thanks so much, Linda Lee. I'm delighted you enjoyed, but I understand you concerns, too. I have to be honest--one of my biggest gripes with writers occurs when they don't respect me enough to make leaps--assuming they're talented enough to provide an adequate springboard. Authors who don't challenge me to participate, bore me.
Having said that, I may have not fulfilled my part of the bargain this time out. I just want you to know that I'm not being careless. I'm really trying to form a partnership with my readers.
I really do appreciate your comments, Linda Lee, and I'll revisit the 'jumpy' parts.
Peace, Lee
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Your writing shows you aren't careless. Not one bit. And at the end of the day, critique of this kind, be it from a reading or writing perspective, is only one person's opinion. I probably zeroed in on your transitions because as a writer, they are something I'm striving to do a better job with. As a reader, anything that slows down my enjoyment (whether I can identify it or not) is something I'd feel bad for not mentioning in this kind of environment.
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I understand your concerns, Linda Lee, and appreciate you pointing them out. Still, I'm prone to pussy-foot around these things because many folk mistake discussion for defense. We don't have that problem.
If you ever have some time, I'd appreciate hearing about your thoughts concerning the jumps, and maybe your suggestions about how to smooth them out. Again, my thanks.
Peace, Lee
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Dear God, please don't feel the need to pussy foot with me. I EXPECT you to engage me in conversation, even if explaining something constitutes defense around here. I surely don't see it that way.
Anyway, I will send you a PM with more details. Give me a few minutes to write them.
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I've sent you some suggestions via PM
Comment from adewpearl
love your author's notes disclaimer
and your strongly worded opening paragraph LOL
I'm dying of laughter as the narrator mulls over which is worse, kids or cats LOL
and then the commentary on cul-de-sacs - this curmudgeon just gets grumpier and more malcontent with every lovable line :-)
squaggles of screaming kids - one of the best coined words I've ever read :-)
wonderful commentary on Edie and the nature of compromise
forty year's worth - years' - plural possessive
what a great love story of Princess and Yellow Man
What a poignant conversation with the ghost of Edie - funny and sentimental in just the right mix
This is super fantastic, Lee :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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love your author's notes disclaimer
and your strongly worded opening paragraph LOL
I'm dying of laughter as the narrator mulls over which is worse, kids or cats LOL
and then the commentary on cul-de-sacs - this curmudgeon just gets grumpier and more malcontent with every lovable line :-)
squaggles of screaming kids - one of the best coined words I've ever read :-)
wonderful commentary on Edie and the nature of compromise
forty year's worth - years' - plural possessive
what a great love story of Princess and Yellow Man
What a poignant conversation with the ghost of Edie - funny and sentimental in just the right mix
This is super fantastic, Lee :-) Brooke
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Thank you, Brooke. I love that you noted my opening paragraph--criminy, I used a cat photo! I had to off set. I also love that you used 'curmudgeon'--a station to which I aspire.
And your comment about the mix between funny and sentimental. You absolutlely get it. That's exactly where I try to live.
I wish you would write prose. Oh, no, I don't.
Thank you, my friend.
Peace, Lee
