Savannah Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Chapter 2, part I"Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?
68 total reviews
Comment from RaymondJohn
I see how the first chapter works in. The idea of ghosts is interesting and I'll have to watch how you develop it. Good forward movement and sound narrative. Best wishes. ray.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
I see how the first chapter works in. The idea of ghosts is interesting and I'll have to watch how you develop it. Good forward movement and sound narrative. Best wishes. ray.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Now why vouldn't I give you a six - site won't allow me to... I thoroughly enjoyed this... just love the characters, Billy joe and Cash... and the way the talk to each other...
Mind, Cash does a lot of head-scratching - has he got fleas - ha
I love to read about the different names they use in other parts of the States...
Heroes over here are mixed chocolates, something like Quality Street
A great chapter, Barbara... most interesting and entertaining.
Margaret
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
Now why vouldn't I give you a six - site won't allow me to... I thoroughly enjoyed this... just love the characters, Billy joe and Cash... and the way the talk to each other...
Mind, Cash does a lot of head-scratching - has he got fleas - ha
I love to read about the different names they use in other parts of the States...
Heroes over here are mixed chocolates, something like Quality Street
A great chapter, Barbara... most interesting and entertaining.
Margaret
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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I will check the head scratching. Thank you for the observation and kind review.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Barb I'm so glad I saved my last 6 rating
Of course you know your dialogue and scenes are always very clear.
I like how you showed the difference of how the South think then the north (small example)
I see tonic as a soda with quinine and you called it
coke a cola.
Gert
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
Barb I'm so glad I saved my last 6 rating
Of course you know your dialogue and scenes are always very clear.
I like how you showed the difference of how the South think then the north (small example)
I see tonic as a soda with quinine and you called it
coke a cola.
Gert
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the kind review and words of encouragement.
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Smiles
Gert
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Ooo, very good, Barbara. This flowed very well. Great dialogue - love the interaction between Paige and the men. You handled the north/south differences beautifully and with some nice gentle humour.
And what a hook to leave us with! I think you're onto a good story here. I really look forward to reading more.
Av
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
Ooo, very good, Barbara. This flowed very well. Great dialogue - love the interaction between Paige and the men. You handled the north/south differences beautifully and with some nice gentle humour.
And what a hook to leave us with! I think you're onto a good story here. I really look forward to reading more.
Av
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the kind review review.
Comment from Tonulak
Dear Barbarbra, I like the premise of tis I have a bit of trouble with being able to tell a Yankee woman by looking at her. I think to a hot working man, the origin of a wojman's pretty figure would be secondary. I'd think I'd have them notice the plates on the car first. The bit of language play, tonic and hoagies, seemed a little forced. Surely , people in Boston know that saying tonic is their own particularity. It would have sounded more natural to say she'd go for sandwiches and Cokes, this seemed like some "writerlydetail. Another thing, almost every Southerner I've ever met calls Coke, "'Co Cola", even Flannery O'Conner in her short stories. Also one little spag; "a new coat of vanish", should be "varnish". Just some thoughts--Ted
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
Dear Barbarbra, I like the premise of tis I have a bit of trouble with being able to tell a Yankee woman by looking at her. I think to a hot working man, the origin of a wojman's pretty figure would be secondary. I'd think I'd have them notice the plates on the car first. The bit of language play, tonic and hoagies, seemed a little forced. Surely , people in Boston know that saying tonic is their own particularity. It would have sounded more natural to say she'd go for sandwiches and Cokes, this seemed like some "writerlydetail. Another thing, almost every Southerner I've ever met calls Coke, "'Co Cola", even Flannery O'Conner in her short stories. Also one little spag; "a new coat of vanish", should be "varnish". Just some thoughts--Ted
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Thank you for your comments. I never thought about the noticing the Yankee before the tags. It's true. I will fix that. Thank you.
Comment from purrfect tale
The switch in time periods surprised me until the haunted aspect of the story came into things. I like the language 'barrier' you have going.
I've been to it with Aunt Paula, but I don't remember how to get to it." - using 'to it' twice in one sentence sounds a little off. You might want to change the first set to 'there'
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
The switch in time periods surprised me until the haunted aspect of the story came into things. I like the language 'barrier' you have going.
I've been to it with Aunt Paula, but I don't remember how to get to it." - using 'to it' twice in one sentence sounds a little off. You might want to change the first set to 'there'
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the catch. I have edited it a billion times, but when I read your review I saw it immediately. I hate it when that happens.
Comment from kad175
Well done. I like the story and am anxious to read more. I've lived in the north all my life but have never heard soda called tonic, bags called bundles, or subs (hoagies) called heroes. Are these terms specific to a certain region in the north? Keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
Well done. I like the story and am anxious to read more. I've lived in the north all my life but have never heard soda called tonic, bags called bundles, or subs (hoagies) called heroes. Are these terms specific to a certain region in the north? Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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I guess it happens only in Massachusetts. I am from the North myself. A few of my Massachusetts fans recognized it immediately. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Chris Tee
This piece of writing titled "Savannah Love Chapter 2, part I" is indeed an absolute excellent piece of work and a enjoyable read of your new novel. Well done indeed Barbara.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
This piece of writing titled "Savannah Love Chapter 2, part I" is indeed an absolute excellent piece of work and a enjoyable read of your new novel. Well done indeed Barbara.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from unimatrix001
This is a right good piece of literature you got here. A delightful read with lovable characters.
The opening scene was a bit vague on description. Took me two reads to figure out that Billie and Cash were already at the house and didn't arrive in the car with Mr Redman. You also passed up a great opportunity to describe the house as Paige sees it for the first time since her Aunt died. I'd like to know what the house looks like, what parts are in disrepair, and parts still look good, what is different from last time Paige was there.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
This is a right good piece of literature you got here. A delightful read with lovable characters.
The opening scene was a bit vague on description. Took me two reads to figure out that Billie and Cash were already at the house and didn't arrive in the car with Mr Redman. You also passed up a great opportunity to describe the house as Paige sees it for the first time since her Aunt died. I'd like to know what the house looks like, what parts are in disrepair, and parts still look good, what is different from last time Paige was there.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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The house is still in good shape. It's just upgrading to get the historical rating. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Auroraboreal800
I loved this new story... It's clear that this will be wonderful. As we say in Spanish, ¡PROMETE!. I liked the dialogue, so fresh, so casual and fan... Beautifully written.
GREAT JOB Barbara!!
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
I loved this new story... It's clear that this will be wonderful. As we say in Spanish, ¡PROMETE!. I liked the dialogue, so fresh, so casual and fan... Beautifully written.
GREAT JOB Barbara!!
Comment Written 08-Aug-2012
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2012
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Muchas gracias por la amable examen.