Savannah Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Chapter 1 part I"Can a fallen confederate soldier encourage love?
87 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
This is intriguing already, and I'm wondering what it is background FOR... It's amazing what soldiers went thru in the Civil War!
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
  |
This is intriguing already, and I'm wondering what it is background FOR... It's amazing what soldiers went thru in the Civil War!
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
Thank you for the kind review. I am hoping to put it all together. We'll see if I can pull it off. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hi Barb Now let me get this straight your novel is NOT about the Civil war?
One thing I really like about your new novel are the letters you inserted into this chapter
To me those letter adds a special touch.
Gert
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
|
Hi Barb Now let me get this straight your novel is NOT about the Civil war?
One thing I really like about your new novel are the letters you inserted into this chapter
To me those letter adds a special touch.
Gert
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
Nope my new novel is set in today's Savannah, GA, but I need this for background knowledge. I hope to bring it all together. We'll see if I can pull it off. Thank you for the kind review.
-
You are welcome Barb
Wish you well with your research.
Gert
Comment from Dave M
Barbara,
This is an excellent start to your next novel.
Chickamauga is about twenty-five miles from my house. Of course, I've been there. Your prologue has some interesting and factual notes. Ages ago, my high-school history teacher read three related newspaper items from the Civil War. The first was an announcement that ladies were encouraged to save the contents of their chamber pots, in order to make gunpowder. The second was a poem by a Southerner that lamented the whole affair. "After patriotic kissing, we're asking them for patriotic *******. The third was a poem by a Yankee that lauded the Southern women. "Each time a lady lifts her skirt, a Yankee bites the dust."
If you ever come back this way, you might visit the old railroad tunnel at Tunnel Hill. We drove up there this spring. The old tunnel, built before the Civil War, is about a quarter mile long. At one time, it was abandoned, but it has since been developed as a historical site. The railroad built a new tunnel in the 1920's.
I enjoyed this read and have several suggestions:
"If I had to sit any longer on that floor, My [my] ass couldn't handle it."
"Benning said we had to switch because difference in the rail gauge." I'd write, "Benning said we had to switch because the rail gagues are different."
"Lieutenant General Braxton Bragg's Confederate Army of {the} Tennessee had already arrived." The Yankees named their armies after rivers - the Confederates named them after states. For example, R E Lee's army was the Army of Northern Virginia. So, the word in braces, "the," should come out. This is the only historical error I spotted.
"It looks [like] this is where we're going to bivouac."
Dave
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
|
Barbara,
This is an excellent start to your next novel.
Chickamauga is about twenty-five miles from my house. Of course, I've been there. Your prologue has some interesting and factual notes. Ages ago, my high-school history teacher read three related newspaper items from the Civil War. The first was an announcement that ladies were encouraged to save the contents of their chamber pots, in order to make gunpowder. The second was a poem by a Southerner that lamented the whole affair. "After patriotic kissing, we're asking them for patriotic *******. The third was a poem by a Yankee that lauded the Southern women. "Each time a lady lifts her skirt, a Yankee bites the dust."
If you ever come back this way, you might visit the old railroad tunnel at Tunnel Hill. We drove up there this spring. The old tunnel, built before the Civil War, is about a quarter mile long. At one time, it was abandoned, but it has since been developed as a historical site. The railroad built a new tunnel in the 1920's.
I enjoyed this read and have several suggestions:
"If I had to sit any longer on that floor, My [my] ass couldn't handle it."
"Benning said we had to switch because difference in the rail gauge." I'd write, "Benning said we had to switch because the rail gagues are different."
"Lieutenant General Braxton Bragg's Confederate Army of {the} Tennessee had already arrived." The Yankees named their armies after rivers - the Confederates named them after states. For example, R E Lee's army was the Army of Northern Virginia. So, the word in braces, "the," should come out. This is the only historical error I spotted.
"It looks [like] this is where we're going to bivouac."
Dave
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
You were one of the reviewers I was worried about. I just released a deep breath. I will make those corrections. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Curtis Hatch
You have gotten off to a good start. The story flows nicely, and the characters are believable. You paint an excellent word picture of the condition of the troops' footwear and clothing. It sounds historically correct. I enjoyed the read; this is a good start. Curtis
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
|
You have gotten off to a good start. The story flows nicely, and the characters are believable. You paint an excellent word picture of the condition of the troops' footwear and clothing. It sounds historically correct. I enjoyed the read; this is a good start. Curtis
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
I researched and researched, and researched, so I hope I didn't make any mistakes. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from guinea
Very good chapter. Most interesting. A time during the civil war I believe.The imagery is great. i could picture the scene in my mind.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
|
Very good chapter. Most interesting. A time during the civil war I believe.The imagery is great. i could picture the scene in my mind.
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
Thank you for the kind words and review.
Comment from Gungalo
This is going to be an amazing story Barbara, I can just tell. You've got a word here misspelled:
He preceded(proceeded) to write his wife.
Let's hear it for the boys and onward.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
|
This is going to be an amazing story Barbara, I can just tell. You've got a word here misspelled:
He preceded(proceeded) to write his wife.
Let's hear it for the boys and onward.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
Thank you for your eagle eye. I appreciate the help. I hope I can pull this story off. It's a stretch for me.
-
You can do it girl. Don't even worry about it.
-
we'll see
-
Just take it easy and one chapter at a time.
Comment from adewpearl
You set the stage well in your opening lines
Excellent natural-sounding dialogue that also provides vital information
Authentic sounding letters that provide lots of good background info
I'm eager to see where all of this is leading :-) Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
|
You set the stage well in your opening lines
Excellent natural-sounding dialogue that also provides vital information
Authentic sounding letters that provide lots of good background info
I'm eager to see where all of this is leading :-) Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2012
-
Thank you for your kind review. I am worried about this one. I am not a history student and this novel is really stretching my writing ability. I am not sure I can pull it off.
