Blind Trust
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Home Again"A woman is stalked by a fan
16 total reviews
Comment from shelley kaye
great reunion! i love a happy ending.... or should i say middle? lol
a couple things i noticed:
{baker's fine sugar} <-- is baker the name? should it be capped?
{Grey Goose vodka} <-- should vodka be capped too - since it's part of the name?
{theater} <-- ain't it spelled 're'? (theatre)? or can it be both?
that's about it - so norman stanley bates has green eyes eh? ;) lol
thanx for sharing!
shelley :)
p.s. hey do you know why they cut/clip/whatever the tails off dobies? always wondered that lol :-P
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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great reunion! i love a happy ending.... or should i say middle? lol
a couple things i noticed:
{baker's fine sugar} <-- is baker the name? should it be capped?
{Grey Goose vodka} <-- should vodka be capped too - since it's part of the name?
{theater} <-- ain't it spelled 're'? (theatre)? or can it be both?
that's about it - so norman stanley bates has green eyes eh? ;) lol
thanx for sharing!
shelley :)
p.s. hey do you know why they cut/clip/whatever the tails off dobies? always wondered that lol :-P
Comment Written 06-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Hi Shelley,
There's a good reason, actually, ears, too. If they get into a fight, there's no tails to grab also, the ears are very sensitive and once they're cut, there's nothing left to grab. Plus, I just think it makes them handsome. The ears, anyway.
And here I thought you were freed from the restraints of punctuation and capitalization! LOL! I don't think so, Grey Goose is just the name. Baker's sugar is a description, actually. It's very fine and disolves instantly, so it's great for any cold drink, like iced tea. I thing the 'theatre' is British!
Big grins and thanks
Gayle
Comment from Korton
Terrific chapter, Gayle. This line, ["Kip wouldn't have it any other way. I've never in my life met a dog of any breed who loves everybody on sight like she does. Strange."], tells me that we will see an entirely different side of Kip when Cathy is in danger. The story is progressing nicely and maintains a high interest level. Very well done.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Terrific chapter, Gayle. This line, ["Kip wouldn't have it any other way. I've never in my life met a dog of any breed who loves everybody on sight like she does. Strange."], tells me that we will see an entirely different side of Kip when Cathy is in danger. The story is progressing nicely and maintains a high interest level. Very well done.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Tehee, Frank, you crafty dickens. Yes, I don't know what it's gonna take, but I think there's a little something buried inside Kip that might want to get out!
Thanks so much for the kind comments.
Hugs,
Gayle
Comment from Lois Delaney
I think the last line is great. It causes the reader to want to return and read the next chapter.
You are doing so well, showtimebook. Haven't read you for a long time. I've been off the site, and have just returned, but I see certain names are sticking to it, here.
Great job, and hope to catch the next chapter?
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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I think the last line is great. It causes the reader to want to return and read the next chapter.
You are doing so well, showtimebook. Haven't read you for a long time. I've been off the site, and have just returned, but I see certain names are sticking to it, here.
Great job, and hope to catch the next chapter?
Comment Written 06-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Hey Lois,
Yes, actually I took off last year as well. Got so busy, you know how it is. Thanks for stopping by and for the great comments and encouragement. Hope to see you again,
Gayle
Comment from EllieKaye
Hi Gayle,
I love the story of the dog coming home. I have a 17 year old cat who did that once. Was gone for months and came home, terrified and skinny as a pencil.
I had a feeling something bad was going to happen. Wasn't sure what until the final sentence. Oh boy! I'll have to check back to see...
I found a few minor nits.
lit[t]er mates
He returned with the box, wanting Cathy to select the pair she didn't mind l[-o]osing.
"Sounds great. Two Lemon Drop[-']s?"
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Hi Gayle,
I love the story of the dog coming home. I have a 17 year old cat who did that once. Was gone for months and came home, terrified and skinny as a pencil.
I had a feeling something bad was going to happen. Wasn't sure what until the final sentence. Oh boy! I'll have to check back to see...
I found a few minor nits.
lit[t]er mates
He returned with the box, wanting Cathy to select the pair she didn't mind l[-o]osing.
"Sounds great. Two Lemon Drop[-']s?"
Comment Written 06-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Good grief, Ellie, I'll get those guys poste haste! My goodness, I can't believe I did that ... them!
Thanks for the sharp eyes and the great comments,
Gayle
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Don't be too hard on yourself. I get paid to do this and I make mistakes in my writing ALL the time. Ugh. It's easier to notice it when it's not so close. :)
Comment from patmedium
You've left me on another cliff edge... one line, and my breath shortened. Excellent effect ... You can certainly control your audience, dear. Admiration. No criticism.
Pat.
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reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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You've left me on another cliff edge... one line, and my breath shortened. Excellent effect ... You can certainly control your audience, dear. Admiration. No criticism.
Pat.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Hi Pat,
So glad you liked that one. I must confess to a tear or two writing it. I love dogs and you probably can tell. Thanks again and we'll talk soon,
Hugs,
Gayle
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Talk about controlling your audience: Did you ever hear 'Puppet on a string' in the sixties?... Pleased to meet you: I am YOUR puppet! Pat.
Comment from FredCollingwood
I think all animal lovers have experienced this. Comments:
She's licking the salve off as fast as I put it on() and now Kip's joined in the effort. > add comma before a coordinating conjunction joining independent clauses.
I've had a profitable but very busy couple of months at work() and I'm frazzled. > same
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reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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I think all animal lovers have experienced this. Comments:
She's licking the salve off as fast as I put it on() and now Kip's joined in the effort. > add comma before a coordinating conjunction joining independent clauses.
I've had a profitable but very busy couple of months at work() and I'm frazzled. > same
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2010
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Hi Fred, so nice to see you over in this neck of the woods. I keep meaning to come over for a visit, but I keep getting sidetracked. Will be over after lunch, lol.
As you can probably tell, I hate commas and eliminate them every chance I get. Looks like this time I need them. Will implement and thanks so much for the wonderful review.
Gayle
