The West
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "A Proposal"One man's journey west.
28 total reviews
Comment from MelB
Great chapter, Tom. She sure is in a hurry to get married. It's amazing they got anywhere in those wagons. I'm sure there will be some bumps along the way.
reply by the author on 08-Jan-2018
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Great chapter, Tom. She sure is in a hurry to get married. It's amazing they got anywhere in those wagons. I'm sure there will be some bumps along the way.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 08-Jan-2018
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She is anxious. Thanks for reading.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Now I see Sarah and Maurice are getting more serious about their intentions. They even went so far as to get Daddy's blessing. There for a bit it looked like they weren't going to get it, but Maurice stood up to him. Good for Maurice. Maybe he will need to attitude later in case things get a bit dicey for them.
On to the next one!
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Now I see Sarah and Maurice are getting more serious about their intentions. They even went so far as to get Daddy's blessing. There for a bit it looked like they weren't going to get it, but Maurice stood up to him. Good for Maurice. Maybe he will need to attitude later in case things get a bit dicey for them.
On to the next one!
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Thanks. Trouble is coming in the next chapter.
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So I found out. lol
Comment from mbroyles2
We can definitely get sense of impatience on Sarah's part and how her father is trying to temper her down a little. It's obvious that she is infatuated with Tom, but as you said, the journey west is filled with dangers and perils.
Great story.
Michael
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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We can definitely get sense of impatience on Sarah's part and how her father is trying to temper her down a little. It's obvious that she is infatuated with Tom, but as you said, the journey west is filled with dangers and perils.
Great story.
Michael
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Thanks for reading. Trouble is on the horizon.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
Your story is interesting and well told.
The passion, excitement, and frustration are all felt through your words and phrases.
Well done and thank you for sharing another good chapter.
Sharon
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Your story is interesting and well told.
The passion, excitement, and frustration are all felt through your words and phrases.
Well done and thank you for sharing another good chapter.
Sharon
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Thanks for reading. The story takes a drastic turn in the ext chapter.
Comment from robyn corum
Thomas,
It may surprise you to learn that I'm reading this out of order. Sometimes I do that. It's a bad habit of mine. But when I have hundreds of messages in my box, there's not much other way of doing it -- although -- if Tom would fix it so that I could KEEP ME PLACE there I would try better. So it's not my fault, really. I always try really ha... well, not really. I actually don't try much at all, to tell the honest-to-God truth of the matter. And I don't like lying, so I always do try to tell the truth. If I have to go to Hell, I certainly don't want it to be over so simple a matter a the reading and reviewing of a story -- oh, wait -- now I remember... the review!
Oh, but I'm too tired now...
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Thomas,
It may surprise you to learn that I'm reading this out of order. Sometimes I do that. It's a bad habit of mine. But when I have hundreds of messages in my box, there's not much other way of doing it -- although -- if Tom would fix it so that I could KEEP ME PLACE there I would try better. So it's not my fault, really. I always try really ha... well, not really. I actually don't try much at all, to tell the honest-to-God truth of the matter. And I don't like lying, so I always do try to tell the truth. If I have to go to Hell, I certainly don't want it to be over so simple a matter a the reading and reviewing of a story -- oh, wait -- now I remember... the review!
Oh, but I'm too tired now...
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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You always read out of order. The next chapter I'm going to write out of order.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Well done with this entertaining chapter in which Sarah is really brought to life through the dialogue and interaction with her father. They really would have had to be strong of body and character to persevere through the long journey.
cheers,
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Well done with this entertaining chapter in which Sarah is really brought to life through the dialogue and interaction with her father. They really would have had to be strong of body and character to persevere through the long journey.
cheers,
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Thanks for reading. I see you already read chapter 5 so it's not a spoiler alert to tell you disaster strikes.
Comment from rtobaygo
Good morning, Thomas
Strong continuation. Enjoyed the read. So the level of involvement between Sarah and Tom has progressed to the point they wish to be married. Like the way you made Tom squirm when he went to Maurice to ask for his daughter's hand in marriage. Sarah seems like she's going to be quite a handful for both her father and Tom. Well done.
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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Good morning, Thomas
Strong continuation. Enjoyed the read. So the level of involvement between Sarah and Tom has progressed to the point they wish to be married. Like the way you made Tom squirm when he went to Maurice to ask for his daughter's hand in marriage. Sarah seems like she's going to be quite a handful for both her father and Tom. Well done.
Take care and stay safe,
Ray
Comment Written 07-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jan-2018
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thanks for reviewing and the generous six.
Comment from Thesis
I'm not used to this Western Tom writing. It's different, but good. The story is easy to follow and flows well. The dialogue however is kind of predictable, and not like your usual twists. Good but not what I'm used to reading.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018
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I'm not used to this Western Tom writing. It's different, but good. The story is easy to follow and flows well. The dialogue however is kind of predictable, and not like your usual twists. Good but not what I'm used to reading.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018
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Thanks for reading. I hope you stick it out. Things are about to change.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I wish I had a six for this post, but I'm out of them. I like the way you described having to cross the rivers. There would be quit a few to cross. I grew up by the Mississippi in Illinois. It can be a cankerous old river.
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018
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I wish I had a six for this post, but I'm out of them. I like the way you described having to cross the rivers. There would be quit a few to cross. I grew up by the Mississippi in Illinois. It can be a cankerous old river.
Comment Written 06-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018
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Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from lyenochka
You've become a romance writer, Tom! Glad for the couple. I sure don't know if a young romance can tolerate the difficult months of traveling the Oregon Trail.
One grammar note: "of those Indians " (I've been told that only Indians from India are capitalized but the indigenous people of the Americas are written as lowercase.)
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018
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You've become a romance writer, Tom! Glad for the couple. I sure don't know if a young romance can tolerate the difficult months of traveling the Oregon Trail.
One grammar note: "of those Indians " (I've been told that only Indians from India are capitalized but the indigenous people of the Americas are written as lowercase.)
Comment Written 06-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018
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According to my research both Indians are capitalized. Thanks for reviewing. Things are about to become difficult for the travelers.
