Reviews from

Act of Endurance

Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Simon"
Dawn of Chaos

27 total reviews 
Comment from Trudi Perkins
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is an interesting poem indeed. I really enjoyed this poem very much. Thanks for sharing your craft with us and I look forward to reading more of your writings. Thanks again.

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 27-Feb-2018
    Glad aspects of this work was found appealing to you. Thanking you for your generous rate and touching views.
Comment from Helen Balnaves
Good
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Hello TPAC, I think your poem is good. I did however wonder if English was your second language as there are a lot of grammar issues. However, as I'm finding my way around the site, I can't help noticing that everyone gives five stars whether they deserve it or not, so I'm slightly confused. But, I couldn't in all honesty give this five stars because of the way it reads. Like this:

I like Simon stated had endeavors, You see this doesn't read well. Are you trying to say that Simon has stated endeavours? Anyway, let me know if you fix your work, but I am trying to review the way it is explained on the site. Even though in doing this, there are people who just can't take an honest critique, no matter how well meant it is, so I hope I haven't offended you by removing a star for what I can't understand, and for what isn't written correctly

. Example: All come to the pure facts spoken,
its home said to had happen to him,
his dome had set in say of himself.

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 28-Feb-2018
    A great review pointing out my flaws in given writes, i'm working on revisions. I'm too baffled at rating. Thanking you for your generous rate and splendid views.
Comment from Mistydawn
Excellent
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Sounds like this Simon is quite a storyteller in several different genres, knowing how to bring out emotions in people. It's well-written, descriptive, interesting.

 Comment Written 26-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 28-Feb-2018
    Yeah, this writes holds potential, yet grammar flaws could make its read difficult. Thanking you for your generous rate and comforting thought.
reply by Mistydawn on 28-Feb-2018
    Keep trying, you'll get it.
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent
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It's all a person can do is tell their own story, even when we're writing material for other people to use. I've think you've done well with your post with vivid imagery.

Thank you so much for sharing.

Gloria

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    I do try. Thanks to comments from members, aspects of my presentation has change things for thr better. Thanking you for your generous rate and welcomed thoughts.
Comment from Joan E.
Excellent
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Thank you for sharing your story of Simon, the storyteller. I liked your use of "sun crack" to draw the reader into your poem, and your use of echoing sounds, as in the final stanza with "come/home/dome". Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    I've found numerous creative writes among members, such a resource it hard not to alter style. Glad aspects presented in this write was found pleasing. Thanking you for your generous rate and touching views.
Comment from F Scott Hafner
Good
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Beautiful art - language too abstract for me as I am not a sophisticated reader. Simon Portrays humor in his stories, is a very direct sentence among much lees so. Is humor the intent of the poem> What is this standout sentence trying to say? I wish I was better at understanding poetry.

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2018
    No, I wish I was better in conveying my ideals. I fight daily to do better. Thanking you for your generous rate and splendid views about this write.
Comment from Debbie Pope
Excellent
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I am having trouble with this one. Not that I don't like it. I just don't understand and I have read several times. for instance--His conflicts heard that still goer. I do not have a clue. This is not a criticism. There are so many poems coming through Fan Story that I likewise do not get. It is simply a reaction. I always want to know how people react to my poems. Good luck with your writing.

 Comment Written 07-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    All the woes detailed in my writes, I desire statements as yours to better its message connection. My writes are under constant revisions. Thanking you for another pull up sleeve effort to get them right. Thanking you for your generous rate and splendid views.
reply by Debbie Pope on 09-Feb-2018
    I love your response. I enjoy rolling my sleeves up and delving in.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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This speaks about the storyteller who knows the art of storytelling in his own style everyone would like; well said, well done. Keep writing. DR ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 07-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    Everyone has encountered such an individual, stories told making one ponder actual depths of its truth, grasping conceptions beholding to heart. Thanking you for your generous rate and touching thoughts.
Comment from Ella Gott
Excellent
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I love this, and I hope that you will continue writing for as long as you are able! I will keep a sharp eye out for your posts, don't let me down LOL. 5 stars!!

 Comment Written 07-Feb-2018


reply by the author on 08-Feb-2018
    Again glad this write also captured some aspects of interestsworking to eliminate flaws in my written expression. Thanking up-lifting encouragement as your stated to fire me up. Thanking you for your generous rate and touching thoughts.
Comment from thi366
Good
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This writing is appropriate for teenagers and older people as young children might find it rather difficult to grasp the meaning. Reading this shows that
the persona is a wise man who brings laughter to children and advises couples. He also can tell stories and make listeners cry. recommended to read and ponder .

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 30-Aug-2016


reply by the author on 30-Aug-2016
    At least you didn't mentioned pits beyond its placement among assuming young adults. Thanking you for generous rate and welcomed thoughts.