Sonnets
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "I Love A Gal With Brains"A collection of sonnets
32 total reviews
Comment from SET66669
I have a spot reserved for this contest...my 1st horror sonnet. Haven't been writing on site too much lately, period. Anyway, your sonnet is wonderful. Very vivid imagery comes into mind! Good luck, and thanks for sharing that wonderful piece
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2015
I have a spot reserved for this contest...my 1st horror sonnet. Haven't been writing on site too much lately, period. Anyway, your sonnet is wonderful. Very vivid imagery comes into mind! Good luck, and thanks for sharing that wonderful piece
Comment Written 04-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2015
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Thank you very much. This should be a great competition. Best of luck to you. I'm so pleased you enjoyed my piece. mikey
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
LOL! The contest idea was really silly but you wrote a winner. It's a perfectly gory and disgusting anti-sonnet, and I can't imagine any others beating this gem! :)
LOL! The contest idea was really silly but you wrote a winner. It's a perfectly gory and disgusting anti-sonnet, and I can't imagine any others beating this gem! :)
Comment Written 14-Jan-2015
Comment from amahra
Wow, the art work looks a little like Christopher Lee, the 1960s Dracula. Well, this poem should do well in the contest. It's really scary with a great scary lot of words. I love the red font and black background that lends credibility to this frightening poem.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
Wow, the art work looks a little like Christopher Lee, the 1960s Dracula. Well, this poem should do well in the contest. It's really scary with a great scary lot of words. I love the red font and black background that lends credibility to this frightening poem.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
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Cool picture, huh. I had no idea it would be so big and creepy!! Lots of fun to write this. Not my usual topic. Well, they want HORROR. I aims to please. :)) mikey
Comment from seaglass
EEEK! You must be under a lot of stress. This isn't Sweet Mike the night wolf of FS. OK, so it's a contest entry, not an alter ego. Good rhyme and nothing can get more horrible so you are probably the winner. Good luck.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
EEEK! You must be under a lot of stress. This isn't Sweet Mike the night wolf of FS. OK, so it's a contest entry, not an alter ego. Good rhyme and nothing can get more horrible so you are probably the winner. Good luck.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
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I had to sacrifice my normal sensibilities to the demands of my craft. You're not alone. This doesn't seem to be a favorite among civilized people. :) Well, it is supposed to be HORROR, so I guess this is the reactions I want! mikey
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Bloody inhumane. Like the last two lines of this Sonnet. The blood-red makes this horror a chiller, not a thriller. There's no mistake, as Dracula wears his cape, we gape. I Love A Gal With Brains. A fitting title for such midnight madness. I wear my pocodot scarf as i read this grouse aberration of an invisible vampire stalking the the dark shadows of a Transylvania, Romania castle. Count your blood droplets splattering the corridor deck. He's no Glenn Beck, heck. wackydo.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
Bloody inhumane. Like the last two lines of this Sonnet. The blood-red makes this horror a chiller, not a thriller. There's no mistake, as Dracula wears his cape, we gape. I Love A Gal With Brains. A fitting title for such midnight madness. I wear my pocodot scarf as i read this grouse aberration of an invisible vampire stalking the the dark shadows of a Transylvania, Romania castle. Count your blood droplets splattering the corridor deck. He's no Glenn Beck, heck. wackydo.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
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Hey Bro! I've been wondering where you were. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. Hahaha!!! Glad you liked this. I think I have this damn iambic pentamacrap down finally! A couple people thought this was pretty sick, so I guess I did my job. Don't be a stranger. mikey
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Life had tangled me into the corner of my dream catcher's web, lately. The fly has escaped from the web. Worm, that is. Need that doubloon.
Comment from Tatarka2
This is so not my favorite of your pieces. I almost gave it a 4, but then I realized it was a "horror sonnet" entry. For that purpose, it's a fine poem. The rhyme works well, and the theme is appropriate. I've read so many of your poems that just took my breath away with their lyrical flow and descriptive power, though. This just doesn't seem to fit with the usual quality of your poetry, which is so often masterful.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
This is so not my favorite of your pieces. I almost gave it a 4, but then I realized it was a "horror sonnet" entry. For that purpose, it's a fine poem. The rhyme works well, and the theme is appropriate. I've read so many of your poems that just took my breath away with their lyrical flow and descriptive power, though. This just doesn't seem to fit with the usual quality of your poetry, which is so often masterful.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
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You're not alone! Many ladies with good taste found this not to their liking. :)) It is a HORROR sonnet. I had to be true to my craft. Ha! It's really good for what it is, I think. Yeah, probably not going to be quoted at any high society gatherings. Good to hear from you. I hope things are going well for you. Is all well? I promise something more uplifting with my next effort. mikey
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All is as well as it can be at this point. Thank you so much for asking. I look forward to continuing to review your writing. You truly have a gift.
Comment from adewpearl
strong abab rhyming in your quatrains followed by a closing couplet - all in good English sonnet format
excellent use of consistent iambic meter to make for good cadence and enjambment to make for good flow of thought from line to line
good uses of alliteration throughout
Love the gallows humor that begins with the delightfully alliterative punning title
great detail throughout with good contrast between what others do in response to a pretty girl and what this demented guy does :-) a fun horror sonnet, my friend :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
strong abab rhyming in your quatrains followed by a closing couplet - all in good English sonnet format
excellent use of consistent iambic meter to make for good cadence and enjambment to make for good flow of thought from line to line
good uses of alliteration throughout
Love the gallows humor that begins with the delightfully alliterative punning title
great detail throughout with good contrast between what others do in response to a pretty girl and what this demented guy does :-) a fun horror sonnet, my friend :-) Brooke
Comment Written 13-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
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Thank you so much. This was great fun. Some of the ladies found it a bit much. But, it is a HORROR sonnet, I have to be true to my craft. Ha! What a wonderful review. I'm so pleased. mikey
Comment from mfowler
Good sonnet structure
You build a picture of your romantic connections to the gal with brains, establishing early that you're not the kind of ghoul a gal should dally with
The turn is cute, whereby, for a fleeting moment, you decide to be a romantic kind of guy, but your base nature inevitably turns when you smell her brains
You went seriously close to being sexist with that title, but it's OK, you only meant to eat her head
Lovely rhymes and great use of assonance, enjambment and alliteration to build a rhythm
Wonderfully macabre, perfect for the prompt
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
Good sonnet structure
You build a picture of your romantic connections to the gal with brains, establishing early that you're not the kind of ghoul a gal should dally with
The turn is cute, whereby, for a fleeting moment, you decide to be a romantic kind of guy, but your base nature inevitably turns when you smell her brains
You went seriously close to being sexist with that title, but it's OK, you only meant to eat her head
Lovely rhymes and great use of assonance, enjambment and alliteration to build a rhythm
Wonderfully macabre, perfect for the prompt
Comment Written 13-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2015
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I truly tried to be a gentleman and treat my date like a lady, but she was just so brainy... Some of the ladies weren't too fond of this piece! Well, it's a HORROR sonnet, I have to be true to my craft. :) I had the word "macabre" in the poem, but the dictionary says it's three syllables. I've always heard it pronounced mu-cob. Oh well. Thanks for the great review. mikey
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I say 'ma-carb' Only two syllables, wher you are and wher I am. Dictionaries, Smickionaries. What would they know?
Comment from krys123
Mikey; brilliant, masterful and truly a very well-written horror sonnet that is fun to read and very digestible. Chuckle!. Your rhyming is done very well and neither forced nor labored and very helpful in the rhythmic flow. Your rhythm's cadence, tempo, meter and movement and I must say also your timing was done also very well and helped reading your poem clearly and easily. Also I must say your choice of rhyming words fit very well is there integrated with the concepts and the ideas. The ghoulish nature of your poem is perfectly written and keeps with the concept of the poem.
Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing and posting and may all your future endeavors be graced by the Lord and your way of masterful way of writing your work.
Alex
Mikey; brilliant, masterful and truly a very well-written horror sonnet that is fun to read and very digestible. Chuckle!. Your rhyming is done very well and neither forced nor labored and very helpful in the rhythmic flow. Your rhythm's cadence, tempo, meter and movement and I must say also your timing was done also very well and helped reading your poem clearly and easily. Also I must say your choice of rhyming words fit very well is there integrated with the concepts and the ideas. The ghoulish nature of your poem is perfectly written and keeps with the concept of the poem.
Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing and posting and may all your future endeavors be graced by the Lord and your way of masterful way of writing your work.
Alex
Comment Written 13-Jan-2015
Comment from Sankey
Oooh yuck! Good layout and very real in your queer imagination again mate. When's the next in the series of your story coming along?
Oooh yuck! Good layout and very real in your queer imagination again mate. When's the next in the series of your story coming along?
Comment Written 12-Jan-2015