The Story of Grabby and Harry
One more telling of two brothers.9 total reviews
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Nice retelling of the story.
God: Grabby, l won' forsake you. - oops
I have to say, though, that I would not expect this entry to win based on the matter of format. It presents as dialogue with 3rd person narration, lacking any 'directives' normally present in a play.
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Nice retelling of the story.
God: Grabby, l won' forsake you. - oops
I have to say, though, that I would not expect this entry to win based on the matter of format. It presents as dialogue with 3rd person narration, lacking any 'directives' normally present in a play.
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Modern Theater is a dimension that this might work. But I agree. And I’ve never written a screenplay before. I do appreciate your insight.-Bill
Comment from Teri7
Bill, This is a wonderful screen play you have done. You used great descriptive words and I could go back to the Bible and remember the scenes. Great job my friend. I wish you the best in the contest. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Bill, This is a wonderful screen play you have done. You used great descriptive words and I could go back to the Bible and remember the scenes. Great job my friend. I wish you the best in the contest. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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I don't expect to do well. This is my first attempt at a screenplay. I have much to learn. I am just appreciative that I have a place I can try something I've never done before and not get crucified for it. Pardon the pun. Thanks,Teri. I am grateful for all your reviews. -Bill
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this modernized version of the Parable of the Prodigal son. You did an excellent job writing this. This story has always been on of my favorites.
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Thank you for sharing this modernized version of the Parable of the Prodigal son. You did an excellent job writing this. This story has always been on of my favorites.
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Actually, Barbara, it's the story of Jacob and Esau. However. the story of the Prodigal can be found in some form in every major religion. Thanks so much for your review. I have appreclated your attention to the writes I have shared on F/S. But this one took several hours to even come close to being made public. -Bill
Comment from Bill Schott
This is a funny and interesting retelling of the Prodigal Son which may make the concept and importance easier to absorb. Neat. ......................
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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This is a funny and interesting retelling of the Prodigal Son which may make the concept and importance easier to absorb. Neat. ......................
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Thanks, Bill. Actually including the Prodigal Son story into this screenplay was an after-thought. This screenplay is about Jacob and Esau. But Jesus, at Jacob's Well could not be ignored. I don't believe in coincidences. That he told the story of the Prodigal Son at the well named after the Hebrew story of the Prodigal. That is, Jacob and Esau.
Anyway, Bill, thank you for sharing one of your sixes. -Bill
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Wow, your play is such a clever take on this classic story! I love how you bring humor into the biblical tale. You make it so fresh and enjoyable to read. The humor "but who's counting?" and "Sometimes even God is at a loss for words" was fantastic! The way you use the name "Grabby" to highlight his character is brilliant. This was such a fun and thought provoking read - I really enjoyed it!
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Wow, your play is such a clever take on this classic story! I love how you bring humor into the biblical tale. You make it so fresh and enjoyable to read. The humor "but who's counting?" and "Sometimes even God is at a loss for words" was fantastic! The way you use the name "Grabby" to highlight his character is brilliant. This was such a fun and thought provoking read - I really enjoyed it!
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Finally, someone appreciated my feeble attempts to make this a read that would bring joy to the reader. I know. Many of us have come with lots of drama if we had a brother or brothers. But, lighten up!
Thanks, Michael, for a wonderful review. -Bill
Comment from royowen
Yes, it's funny how God chose the royal succession, in fact Esau is the father of those that became Israel's enemy, and they've been enemies ever since that time, although many of Esau's descendants have become Faithful followers of Christ, but so many things about Jacob resemble us. I just wrote a poem about truth, I believe it is when we accept the truth of ourselves and our fallen condition, we discover truth of being sinners and humility at the same time. Hence truth sets us free. Beautifully written Bill, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Yes, it's funny how God chose the royal succession, in fact Esau is the father of those that became Israel's enemy, and they've been enemies ever since that time, although many of Esau's descendants have become Faithful followers of Christ, but so many things about Jacob resemble us. I just wrote a poem about truth, I believe it is when we accept the truth of ourselves and our fallen condition, we discover truth of being sinners and humility at the same time. Hence truth sets us free. Beautifully written Bill, blessings Roy
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Roy, if it's on your profile, I will hunt it down. Any chance you would allow me to be a friend so that I would be notified when you make something public?
And, thanks for a wonderful review and adding to the significance of this story. -Bill
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You only need to fan me Bill.
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is an excellent script and it's well written. I'm not Jewish but I'm old school 1st generation Greek. I have two brothers. When we were growing up I was youngest of five. One of my brothers was a hippie turned rich businessman, and one was a US Marine. they didn't really fight but they were very different and weren't very close. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. I could relate and I know the biblical story too.
Best wishes,
Alex
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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This is an excellent script and it's well written. I'm not Jewish but I'm old school 1st generation Greek. I have two brothers. When we were growing up I was youngest of five. One of my brothers was a hippie turned rich businessman, and one was a US Marine. they didn't really fight but they were very different and weren't very close. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. I could relate and I know the biblical story too.
Best wishes,
Alex
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Thanks, Alex, for your review, but also for sharing how this piece touched your life. Every person I have known who had a brother, have said that these two stories were what they grew up with.
Thanks again. -Bill
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Oh yes. You're welcome. Bill!
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
William,
This is brilliant!! I absolutely love the script you've written and the easy way it is written. I understood your characters, setting and narration. Of course, it is a familiar story, but told in an engaging way for modern man. Loved it. Best of luck in the contest,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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William,
This is brilliant!! I absolutely love the script you've written and the easy way it is written. I understood your characters, setting and narration. Of course, it is a familiar story, but told in an engaging way for modern man. Loved it. Best of luck in the contest,
Rhonda
Comment Written 12-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2025
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Thanks, Rhonda. I've always wanted to write a screenplay. This is my one-time chance. This took hours to do. Back to poetry and story.
-Bill
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I don't know, I liked it!
Comment from patcelaw
This is a very nicely written screenplay, and you have put it together very well. I enjoyed very much listening to it. It flows very well when it is read aloud may you have the very best week and day. May you also be blessed by God. I wish you the very best in the contest.Patricia
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2025
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This is a very nicely written screenplay, and you have put it together very well. I enjoyed very much listening to it. It flows very well when it is read aloud may you have the very best week and day. May you also be blessed by God. I wish you the very best in the contest.Patricia
Comment Written 11-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2025
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Pat, how can I make an audio? What do I need to do? Thanks for the
review. I wish I could be on F/S more often. Thanks for your insight.
-Bill
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You don't have to make it an audio here on fan story all the people have to do is to have the audio capability on their device that they're using. I have an iPad and there is a setting where I can get things read to me. How do I get there? I cannot explain it because my daughter does that for me.
