Reviews from

One Thousand Cranes

Viewing comments for Chapter 303 "As the Day Dims"
Gypsy's Favorites

20 total reviews 
Comment from Faith Williams
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A poem (even prose) which brings alive all the senses is such an enjoyable read. I wish I had six stars to give you! Your new form is delightful, and I will have to give it a try. I liked the first stanza and the line about 'feeling the sunshine of your soul'. The cool sea breeze evokes a wonderful image in my mind--I love the beach. And the dual meaning of 'tucking in' in the third stanza is great. A wonderful poem, Gypsy. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 23-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2023
    Thank you very much for taking the time to read and write the exceptional review. I hope you try it.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from kahpot
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

What a wonderful form of poetry, involving all the senses in a beautiful day had by lovers, rhyme in the last stanza is excellent, so many very descriptive words in this read, very well presented****kahpot

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 23-Jun-2023
    I didn't mean to rhyme but sometimes it happens naturally.

    I appreciate your kind words and exceptional six stars review.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from dragonpoet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi MariVal,
This poem gives clear image of fun at sunset. You don't mention the specific senses but you have touch in the feel of the wind and sun.
And hearing in the giggling. Sight is throughout the poem. Taste and smell can be the food and wine,
Keep writing and stay healthy
Have a good rest of your week
Joan

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    The poem requires 5 senses and I covered them all.

    Thank you very much, Joan. I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from aryr
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This was a great 'five senses' poem, it definitely covered all the senses, Gypsy. I really liked the dual pictures, they brought a sense of calmness. Your words covered all the senses. Blessed Be n Hugs!!!

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Thank you very much, Aryr. I appreciate your exceptional six stars review. Blessed be.

    Gypsy hugs
reply by aryr on 22-Jun-2023
    Most welcome, Gypsy.
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Aw, Marival this poem is so beautifully written, and encompasses all the five senses and so beautifully so. I don't have a six to give, but I wished I did. Un abrazo, Ulla xx

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Ulla,
    Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent five stars review. May you have a wonderful day.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

One again you managed not only a great poem that touches on all five senses, but you placed this amazing poem in a perfect package. Great job once again. I am honored to be a fan of yours.

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Barbara,
    Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent five stars review. May you have a wonderful day.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Mike Stevens
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Another desire is out of control poem, Gypsy----tis a great poetic form you've invented. I've invented one of my own; the sad-sack has no chance style!

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Mike,
    Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent five stars review. May you have a wonderful day.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Goodadvicechan
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It is a challenge to cover sight, touch, smell, taste, and hearing.

Sight ( sun)
touch, ( caress)
smell, taste, ( dinner)
hearing, (breeze)

Well done. Thanks for sharing

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent five stars review. May you have a wonderful day.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from shelley kaye
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

ooh love senses poems - will definitely have to try this out!

love a cool sea breeze - the feeling, the aroma - everything!

great poem! thank you for sharing :-)


 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Shelley,
    Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent five stars review. May you have a wonderful day.

    I'm going to use this new form for our Japanese poetry club. Eventhough is not from Japan, it has the same elements of syllable counting and imagery.

    Thank you very much for your kind words and excellent five stars review.

    Gypsy hugs

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Paul Manton
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Obviously worth the 6stars I don't possess! Very assured, very beautiful, faultless phrasing and perfectly paced.
The graphics are superbly designed, the font and its changing colors enhances and carries the words very effectively.
And then the message itself - not only passes through all the senses, but (I'm not surprised to say) engages us in synesthesia several times.
It is a pleasure to review the work of a professional writer.
Thank you, Gypsy.
Paul

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2023


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2023
    Paul,
    Thank you very much for your kind words and exceptional five stars review. I appreciate your detailed feedback. May you have a wonderful day.

    Gypsy hugs