One Thousand Cranes
Viewing comments for Chapter 32 "Gusty Bay Wind"Gypsy's Favorites
6 total reviews
Comment from AP Apgar
I like this poem- good picture presentation- size better- can more easily seen by reader- good flow- the gusty bay wind humming through the reeds is easy to visualize in the beach setting- uncomplicated Haiku - tree giving a standing ovation- nice closing- good job
reply by the author on 16-May-2022
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I like this poem- good picture presentation- size better- can more easily seen by reader- good flow- the gusty bay wind humming through the reeds is easy to visualize in the beach setting- uncomplicated Haiku - tree giving a standing ovation- nice closing- good job
Comment Written 15-May-2022
reply by the author on 16-May-2022
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Thank you very much for taking the time to review. Take care, AP.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from LateBloomer
Hi Gypsy, your poem made me smile. Lots of good imagery.
I especially liked:
tree's standing ovation
(trees - Man's loyal friend. Hopefully, they will always
be there for us and that Man doesn't not betray them -- kill them.)
Lovely photo choice. A pleasure to read. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
reply by the author on 14-May-2022
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Hi Gypsy, your poem made me smile. Lots of good imagery.
I especially liked:
tree's standing ovation
(trees - Man's loyal friend. Hopefully, they will always
be there for us and that Man doesn't not betray them -- kill them.)
Lovely photo choice. A pleasure to read. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer
Comment Written 13-May-2022
reply by the author on 14-May-2022
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Thank you very much for the exceptional review. I am grateful that you took the time to read my poem.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from l.raven
Hi Gypsy, when I lived in Florida...at night I would go
walk on the shore of the beach...I would hear the winds
blowing through the reeds and the sand mounds...it was beautiful...
I love your poem my sweet friend...and I love this picture...
very nicely written...love you...Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 14-May-2022
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Hi Gypsy, when I lived in Florida...at night I would go
walk on the shore of the beach...I would hear the winds
blowing through the reeds and the sand mounds...it was beautiful...
I love your poem my sweet friend...and I love this picture...
very nicely written...love you...Linda xxoo
Comment Written 13-May-2022
reply by the author on 14-May-2022
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Thank you very much for the exceptional review. I am grateful that you took the time to read my poem. Love you, Linda.
Gypsy hugs
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so very welcome sweet girl...love xxoo
Comment from karenina
Ten stars for using "aeolian" in a poem! Yikes! Perfect for the theme -- more meaningful with the image presented. This reminds me of "Race Point" at the tip of Cape Cod...
Impressive, as always!
Karenina
reply by the author on 13-May-2022
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Ten stars for using "aeolian" in a poem! Yikes! Perfect for the theme -- more meaningful with the image presented. This reminds me of "Race Point" at the tip of Cape Cod...
Impressive, as always!
Karenina
Comment Written 13-May-2022
reply by the author on 13-May-2022
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Yes, you are right. It must be hard to deal with this situation. Probably feeling unwanted. I can relate.
Karenina, thank you for the thoughtful review and insightful feedback. You always get my meaning. Someone told me I didn't write Aeolian wind right. I just like the word and checked the meaning in the dictionary. What do you think?
Gypsy hugs
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Definition of aeolian: Giving forth or marked by a moaning or sighing sound or musical tone produced by or as if by the wind.
Also, many references to Aeolian dunes... which of course, are formed by the wind blowing the sand.
I see no reason why your use would be improper.
I would respectfully disagree with whoever offered it was not correct.
Whip out our poetic license and stick to your poem...it's magical!
Comment from lyenochka
I like that the tree or trees are giving a "standing ovation." I know you don't use many punctuations in haiku but I wondered if it might be "tree's standing ovation."
Your poem reminded me of a comment from Dean when I wrote about the "roar of the wind in the cedars." He couldn't believe that metaphor. But it's really loud here! Lol.
reply by the author on 13-May-2022
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I like that the tree or trees are giving a "standing ovation." I know you don't use many punctuations in haiku but I wondered if it might be "tree's standing ovation."
Your poem reminded me of a comment from Dean when I wrote about the "roar of the wind in the cedars." He couldn't believe that metaphor. But it's really loud here! Lol.
Comment Written 13-May-2022
reply by the author on 13-May-2022
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I love using descriptive onomatopoeic words. It's fun to describe the wind. I think roaring wind is a great description. Dean was not always right.
Gynt gave me this review. What do you think?
I take the point that you are using the word aeolian in an onomatopoeic way here but given its dictionary meaning and its connection with the Greek wind god it did seem to me to be something of a tautology here.
Thank you for the kind review. Happy weekend! I love to sleep in LOL
Gypsy hugs
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Love to sleep in, too! But some mornings, I can't - lol, especially Sundays.
Yes, Aeolian sounds like the wind in the very word. If you didn't want the repetition, you could say Aeolian voice...
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Thank you :)
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I changed it to 'gusty bay wind'
Comment from Pantygynt
I take the point that you are using the word aeolian in an onomatopoeic way here but given its dictionary meaning and its connection with the Greek wind god it did seem to me to be something of a tautology here.
On the other hand, the satori line is magnificent.
reply by the author on 13-May-2022
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I take the point that you are using the word aeolian in an onomatopoeic way here but given its dictionary meaning and its connection with the Greek wind god it did seem to me to be something of a tautology here.
On the other hand, the satori line is magnificent.
Comment Written 13-May-2022
reply by the author on 13-May-2022
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Thank you for your helpful review. I will take a look.
Gypsy