Patrick McKee Phone Call to God
Patrick is trying to get into heaven.48 total reviews
Comment from Laurie Holding
This made my day, Paul. Thank you for redeeming the rhymed poem and for making us laugh while reading you. I think humor in poetry needs that snap of rhyme and that perfect meter that you have so obviously mastered. Well don, and I wish you great luck with this one.
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
  |
This made my day, Paul. Thank you for redeeming the rhymed poem and for making us laugh while reading you. I think humor in poetry needs that snap of rhyme and that perfect meter that you have so obviously mastered. Well don, and I wish you great luck with this one.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thank you, Laurie. I'll try to have some more stuff like this in the future.
Comment from dragonpoet
Paul,
This shows God as sarcastic and with some sense of humor when giving Pat the bad news that he is not getting into heaven. He was not a nice man on earth, to understate the facts.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
 |
Paul,
This shows God as sarcastic and with some sense of humor when giving Pat the bad news that he is not getting into heaven. He was not a nice man on earth, to understate the facts.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 07-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thanks for the review, Joan. Wait 'til you see the next one.
-
No problem, Paul.
I?ll be waiting impatiently
Joan
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Paul,
It's a nice piece of Humor Poetry having smooth flow throughout from top to bottom with lovely rhyming scheme.
No room in heaven for such a sinner as you have depicted here in the poem. Interesting Indeed!
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
|
Hello Paul,
It's a nice piece of Humor Poetry having smooth flow throughout from top to bottom with lovely rhyming scheme.
No room in heaven for such a sinner as you have depicted here in the poem. Interesting Indeed!
Comment Written 07-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thanks for the review. We're not done with Patrick yet.
-
Paul McFarland, Most Welcome!
With best wishes,
~ RP
Comment from Sanku
I loved this poem .The theme is so different from te usual ones and i enjoyed reading the short biography of a debauched man...It was sometimes funny ,sometimes maddening...
I haven't read the previous poem .I will try to go back and read
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
|
I loved this poem .The theme is so different from te usual ones and i enjoyed reading the short biography of a debauched man...It was sometimes funny ,sometimes maddening...
I haven't read the previous poem .I will try to go back and read
Comment Written 07-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thanks for the review. There is a third one coming.
Comment from Goodadvicechan
I like this poem. It is a little bit different from other poems. This poem has many interesting twists such as:
"I'll let you off not going to church, though that does cause me pain,"
"you played doctor with that little girl next door...'I'll let that pass,' But you were fifty-four."
" found you drinking with his wife in Kelly's Bar." etc.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
|
I like this poem. It is a little bit different from other poems. This poem has many interesting twists such as:
"I'll let you off not going to church, though that does cause me pain,"
"you played doctor with that little girl next door...'I'll let that pass,' But you were fifty-four."
" found you drinking with his wife in Kelly's Bar." etc.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thanks for the review. You'll see Patrick again.
Comment from writer723
I enjoyed this humorous and cleverly written poem. The man's misdeeds and misspent youth were certainly laid bare for him to realize. You have a witty way with rhymes and your rhyme scheme is excellent. Great job!
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
|
I enjoyed this humorous and cleverly written poem. The man's misdeeds and misspent youth were certainly laid bare for him to realize. You have a witty way with rhymes and your rhyme scheme is excellent. Great job!
Comment Written 06-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thanks for the review. Patrick will return.
Comment from lyenochka
Lol. Well, it's a good thing that God sent Jesus so that He can examine all our faults by looking through the lens of Jesus' work on all our behalf. Of course, you didn't mention if Patrick put his faith in Him. Enjoyed your humorous poem about this life and death situation. Considering he's already dead, I thought "hold your breath" comment was extra funny!
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
|
Lol. Well, it's a good thing that God sent Jesus so that He can examine all our faults by looking through the lens of Jesus' work on all our behalf. Of course, you didn't mention if Patrick put his faith in Him. Enjoyed your humorous poem about this life and death situation. Considering he's already dead, I thought "hold your breath" comment was extra funny!
Comment Written 06-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 07-Oct-2021
-
Thanks, Helen. You'll get a chance to see Patrick again.
Comment from Janet Foor
LOL!!! I actually had my husband read this one as well which I rarely do and we both laughed again.
A clever and creative story in a poem. Well done Paul.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2021
|
LOL!!! I actually had my husband read this one as well which I rarely do and we both laughed again.
A clever and creative story in a poem. Well done Paul.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 06-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2021
-
Thanks again, Janet. This came up a second time.
Comment from MissMerri
This is quite funny, and the perfect meter and consistent rhyming add to the delightful feel of the poem. I enjoyed it very much and think you have a real talent for story-telling in rhyme. Very clever and fun poem, this one. MM
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2021
|
This is quite funny, and the perfect meter and consistent rhyming add to the delightful feel of the poem. I enjoyed it very much and think you have a real talent for story-telling in rhyme. Very clever and fun poem, this one. MM
Comment Written 06-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2021
-
Thanks, MM. Patrick will reappear in a week or two.
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Brilliant! A wickely witty tour de force in wry humor. Jam-packed with hilarity--priceless phrases--too many to enumerate--a literal LOLOLOL--I needed this!
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2021
|
Brilliant! A wickely witty tour de force in wry humor. Jam-packed with hilarity--priceless phrases--too many to enumerate--a literal LOLOLOL--I needed this!
Comment Written 05-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2021
-
Thanks Liz. Get ready for another one.
-
Look forward to it! I'm guessing he'll be bargaining with the Devil.
-
There'll be some bargaining, but not what you guessed.