Comment from Louise Michelle

Exceptional

Hi Debi,

What a terrific story in a poem, filled with the magic of fantasy, and staying true to the rhymes and meter. I know a lot of effort went into this and it surely earned you a sixer.

Hugs,
Lou

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you for the wonderful six stars, Lou! This was a lot of fun and once I got started the story just sort of took over. Thank you so much for mentioning the rhymes and meter as well as the story. I am so happy you liked it. Debi

Comment from bhogg

Excellent

Some of your author notes were way to technical for me. All I know is that the way that you constructed the poem was great. Well balanced and a pleasure to read with an excellent rhyme scheme. Even told what looks like part of a story! Maybe more to come. Bill

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you for encouraging comments, Bill. Yes, there is more to come. It was getting so long I decided it had to broken into parts or no one would read it. Thank you for enjoying and reviewing. I appreciate it. Debi

Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

I enjoyed your story in a poem. The picture is great. The length was not too much. I am not sure of the format, so I will not comment on that aspect. The poem did have good flow. Good job with the rhyme,too. Good job and thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you for the kind comments and encouragement, Jannypan. I am so happy you enjoyed reading this story poem. Debi

Comment from lakeport

Excellent

Lady Lily and the Wizard, that's a wonderful expressed story poem,very nice rhyming and flow,I enjoyed reading it.God bless you,lakeport.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you for the gracious remarks and stars, Lakeport. I appreciate the encouragement. Debi

reply by lakeport on 10-Oct-2014

your welcome,Hugs!Lakeport.

Comment from nancy_e_davis

Exceptional

She used magic of her own..I suggest [Using magic of her own.] for better meter.
I just wrote one of these, quite by accident and I swear I didn't know. I just thought it was mixed meter but Rose set me straight.
Great picture which I expect was the inspiration. Well done WJ. Hugs. Nancy

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Oh, my goodness, Nancy. A six means so much coming from someone who writes as well as you do. THANK YOU!
I appreciate the suggestion for making the meter better and have made the change in that line.
I can imagine you writing one of these by accident. You have such a good ear and knack for writing poetry that it probably felt as natural as can be to write it.
You are correct about the picture. I wrote a fantasy poem a few weeks back and Dean Kuch attached the picture in the review he wrote. I immediately thought there had to be a story behind it. I just finally got around to writing it.
Thank you very much for the encouragement. Debi

Comment from Glasstruth

Excellent

What a magically story! A king becoming a dragon and the butterfly a queen. So imaginative. Great rhyming throughout. I think kids would really get a kick out of this. Wonderfully crafted! Les

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you, Les. I particularly hope my five-year-old niece Lily likes it. She loves fantasy, especially Disney stuff, but I thought a story with her name in it might be a fun gift. Thank you for the encouraging remarks. Debi

Comment from GracieAnn

Excellent

w.j., it takes clear vision to tell a story using the confines of the Trochee and have it make sense. You have done an admirable job. Good work. :0 GracieAnn

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you for the encouragement, GracieAnn. I appreciate your continued support. Debi

Comment from Nosha17

Excellent

Interesting adventure story within your poem. Good use of descriptive language, rhyming and fantasy imagery to convey your thoughts. Enjoyable read. Faye

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2014

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reply by the author on 10-Oct-2014

Thank you, Faye. I am so happy you enjoyed the story. Thank you for the kind comments also about the imagery, language and rhymes. I appreciate the encouragement. Debi