An Epitaph for Heros and Bums
An essay about subtle appreciation or lack thereof34 total reviews
Comment from judiverse
This is wonderful, and filled with interesting reflections on how you handled the family responsibilities while you were working. Soup is always delicious, and more nutritious than the doughnuts my mother made for us! Great introduction, using the farmer's market that directed your thoughts. I wouldn't want to make pickles or can food. I remember the work my mother put into doing that. Wondering whether anyone cared about the effort you put into doing things is a great insight. I suspect many people also wonder about that. I remember my mother always ironed my dad's work shirts and jeans so carefully. They we went shopping and saw the unpressed look of the clothes in the store. I can imagine what she was thinking. judi
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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This is wonderful, and filled with interesting reflections on how you handled the family responsibilities while you were working. Soup is always delicious, and more nutritious than the doughnuts my mother made for us! Great introduction, using the farmer's market that directed your thoughts. I wouldn't want to make pickles or can food. I remember the work my mother put into doing that. Wondering whether anyone cared about the effort you put into doing things is a great insight. I suspect many people also wonder about that. I remember my mother always ironed my dad's work shirts and jeans so carefully. They we went shopping and saw the unpressed look of the clothes in the store. I can imagine what she was thinking. judi
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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My mother LOVED ironing and once I figured that out, I thought she was an alien, It is the small, but regular chores that are so unimpressive to kids, but prove devotion. Thanks so much for such a great review.
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You're so welcome. My mother even ironed the sheets. judi
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Sick, sick, sick!
Comment from Nosha17
Your reflections are quite normal and so like mine. I only cook from scratch and there's only me to consume it. I bake my own cakes, make lemon curd/jam, then visit with a friend and take her some. I enjoyed reading about trying to have your kids and grandkids follow your ideas and practices. I am happy both my kids eat and cook healthy and from scratch (my son is an excellent cook and bakes his own bread because it is cheaper)It does rub off on them! Well written narrative, good descriptive language and good luck in the contest. Faye
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Your reflections are quite normal and so like mine. I only cook from scratch and there's only me to consume it. I bake my own cakes, make lemon curd/jam, then visit with a friend and take her some. I enjoyed reading about trying to have your kids and grandkids follow your ideas and practices. I am happy both my kids eat and cook healthy and from scratch (my son is an excellent cook and bakes his own bread because it is cheaper)It does rub off on them! Well written narrative, good descriptive language and good luck in the contest. Faye
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Amazing! My son is 40 and he too is an excellent cook, quite capable, who could create a full course meal--meat, potatoes and vegetables--at eight years of age--but doesn't for his kids. It grieves me.
Comment from Eric1
What a wonderfully nostalgic written story Spiritual echo, I have just taken a beautiful walk down memory lane, courtesy of your brilliant writing, and that 'matter of fact' ending was inspired!. Love the way you have presented this, and I wish you every luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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What a wonderfully nostalgic written story Spiritual echo, I have just taken a beautiful walk down memory lane, courtesy of your brilliant writing, and that 'matter of fact' ending was inspired!. Love the way you have presented this, and I wish you every luck in the contest.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Thanks so much, and as an aside, I bought too many vegetables, but the fruit flies appreciate my purchases.
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You are so welcome as are the fruit flies lol
Comment from c_lucas
Being from a family of fourteen-sixteen if I included my parents, the proverbial pot of soup was a mainstay. I have never remembered an empty pot. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words making for a good read.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Being from a family of fourteen-sixteen if I included my parents, the proverbial pot of soup was a mainstay. I have never remembered an empty pot. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words making for a good read.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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Wow! I think I knew that you came from a huge family, but every time I'm reminded, I shake my head in wonder.
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In those days, it was a medium size family.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
When we have a family, we take better care of everything, I think, for one thing, to teach our kids good habits (were you raised in a barn? = somethign we don't to be true for our kids). We're also younger and filled with energy, entertaining more, or at least the kids are having their teenage friends over. When we get old and tired and often sick, we realize it's not worth the effort. :)
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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When we have a family, we take better care of everything, I think, for one thing, to teach our kids good habits (were you raised in a barn? = somethign we don't to be true for our kids). We're also younger and filled with energy, entertaining more, or at least the kids are having their teenage friends over. When we get old and tired and often sick, we realize it's not worth the effort. :)
Comment Written 10-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2014
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You're so right. thanks for reading.
Comment from Drew Delaney
Spiritual Echo. You wrote my story right here. Although, there are others in the house, family boarding, and I babysit when asked, I often slough off the housework more then ever. The house needs cleaning, the grass needs mowing, the flowers need tending and berries need picking. I do the necessities and put off the rest for another day. Like I said, you wrote my story and did a better job at it than I could.
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Spiritual Echo. You wrote my story right here. Although, there are others in the house, family boarding, and I babysit when asked, I often slough off the housework more then ever. The house needs cleaning, the grass needs mowing, the flowers need tending and berries need picking. I do the necessities and put off the rest for another day. Like I said, you wrote my story and did a better job at it than I could.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Thanks so much for sharing my Saturday afternoon dip into nostalgia.
Comment from JM
You sound like my mom. She does not believe in fast food and often frowns when the grandkids prefer Mac and Cheese to a wholesome home cooked meal. I still try to cling on to the "old school" ways because that's how mom did it. I think that's why my husband married me. Your essay is so very well written and I enjoyed reading it.
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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You sound like my mom. She does not believe in fast food and often frowns when the grandkids prefer Mac and Cheese to a wholesome home cooked meal. I still try to cling on to the "old school" ways because that's how mom did it. I think that's why my husband married me. Your essay is so very well written and I enjoyed reading it.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Yeah, but real mac and cheese, with shredded cheese instead of chemicals, is still a great dinner. the difference between your situation and mine is that I hsave a son, and they're not half as invested in nesting instincts a daughters, even if they find faster and smarter ways to do things. Thanks for reading.
Comment from Nomar Chagrin
farmer's market
Well, this kind of got to me, Ingrid. It's a subject I think about every day, i.e., existentialism and the cycles of life in a changing world. Your soul-searching is very thought provoking.
Loved this line = "fondling this thought"
Wouldn't "farmer's market" indicate just one farmer?
Anyway, I feel that I know you better after reading each of your essays. You have a multi-faceted personality. I just hope you never give yourself guilt trips for some of these things you mentioned here.
Much love,
Erik
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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farmer's market
Well, this kind of got to me, Ingrid. It's a subject I think about every day, i.e., existentialism and the cycles of life in a changing world. Your soul-searching is very thought provoking.
Loved this line = "fondling this thought"
Wouldn't "farmer's market" indicate just one farmer?
Anyway, I feel that I know you better after reading each of your essays. You have a multi-faceted personality. I just hope you never give yourself guilt trips for some of these things you mentioned here.
Much love,
Erik
Comment Written 09-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Yes, I'm sure you're right. It should be farmers' not farmer's market.
I gave up guilt, deciding it was an emotion of choice, and quite frankly, I went beyond my expectations of myself, to give the kid every option I never had. And seeing I moved away from my stomping ground a few years ago to continue that support, I haven't got a shred of guilt.
Now if you ask me if I'm pissed off he dresses kids out of laundry baskets and sends his little girl to school with mis-matched socks, well, Erik, that's rage, subdued, silent pissedoffitness.
Thanks, darling, for all the stars.
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You're spot on, Ingrid. Undeserved guilt is a useless emotion.
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We feel guilty when we betray ourselves.
Comment from Chrisfiore
Greetings SE,
Funny, I had a similar conversation with the wife earlier today. The things I did with my kids that no father was around to do with me. The beliefs I held and lived by. The morals I tried to teach. The example I tried to live. Was it all for nought, or was it just that nobody but me took it seriously? I still marvel at the things that I lived by then and still believe today, but the kids act as if it wasn't sincere. Too bad for them. I did the best I could with the substance and knowledge I had at the time. ;) Chrisfiore
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Greetings SE,
Funny, I had a similar conversation with the wife earlier today. The things I did with my kids that no father was around to do with me. The beliefs I held and lived by. The morals I tried to teach. The example I tried to live. Was it all for nought, or was it just that nobody but me took it seriously? I still marvel at the things that I lived by then and still believe today, but the kids act as if it wasn't sincere. Too bad for them. I did the best I could with the substance and knowledge I had at the time. ;) Chrisfiore
Comment Written 09-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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We all did rik,or at least I tried to give more than I ever got, but then maybe, because they were so used to it all, they had no idea that life outside their family was any different for anybody. They came to expect it as normal and now shrug it off. The only part of that I hate is the thought that all that cooking, cleaning, theatre and experiences were for nought. does it mean that it wasn't valuable?
Comment from drivenbackward
Nostalgia is very powerful, but it's a good powerful. As far as the message goes, enabling only weakens (IMO). A few notes to consider, but I don't think you care much about grammar on this one:
home-made -- One word
I didn't follow any recipe -- Comma
--it wasn't a big deal--back then -- One dash would read a lot better here.
The caloric intake from a MacDonald's Happy Meal is higher than my grandson can run off during an hour-long soccer match -- I covered McDonald's for a long time. Millennials (born between 1977 and 1995) are moving away from fast food and toward places like Chipotle and Panera (fast-casual). This is a positive trend. McDonald's is only seeing growth overseas.
Because the house hasn't been cleaned,Door Knob, -- huh?
Calm down, girl, I said to myself. -- Thoughts work well in italics
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Nostalgia is very powerful, but it's a good powerful. As far as the message goes, enabling only weakens (IMO). A few notes to consider, but I don't think you care much about grammar on this one:
home-made -- One word
I didn't follow any recipe -- Comma
--it wasn't a big deal--back then -- One dash would read a lot better here.
The caloric intake from a MacDonald's Happy Meal is higher than my grandson can run off during an hour-long soccer match -- I covered McDonald's for a long time. Millennials (born between 1977 and 1995) are moving away from fast food and toward places like Chipotle and Panera (fast-casual). This is a positive trend. McDonald's is only seeing growth overseas.
Because the house hasn't been cleaned,Door Knob, -- huh?
Calm down, girl, I said to myself. -- Thoughts work well in italics
Comment Written 09-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2014
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Thanks very much for the comments. I've changed a couple, but I really do need to ask you about the hyphen comment. I've always been taught, and have never heard anyone suggest differently until you mention it, the an 'en hyphen,' a double consecutive hyphen is used for emphases, whereas a single hyphen is used with partnered words. This is a new one for me.
Door Knob is a phrase used to call someone a dumb broad, but politer. I added YOU door knob to make it clearer that the alter ego is addressing the narrator.
Fixed the spag. Thanks.
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Got it on Door Knob. For dash, not saying it's wrong, but it reads awkward. Was a recommendation for clarity, not emphasis. For emphasis, italics is a good option.
