One Crowded Hour
About the end of life's journey19 total reviews
Comment from webfoot
Yes it does illustrate that hour well.
the things that you mention are what count, really in life and you say it so poetically
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
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Yes it does illustrate that hour well.
the things that you mention are what count, really in life and you say it so poetically
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
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Thank you very much, glad you like it! R
Comment from Kiki12
Stunning. I can't even find the words to describe how well you intertwine the metaphors and emotions as the life's journey ends just as the day ends. it is a reflective verse about all that led to this point. I love the rhyme, the imagery, and the style of writing. it's truly a gem, and a wonderful entry for the prompt.
this line is just poetic beauty-
life's sun is gently sinking,
In a purple west whose shadows hide the land we may not see-> love it
very nicely done Raoul,
xo
Kiki
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
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Stunning. I can't even find the words to describe how well you intertwine the metaphors and emotions as the life's journey ends just as the day ends. it is a reflective verse about all that led to this point. I love the rhyme, the imagery, and the style of writing. it's truly a gem, and a wonderful entry for the prompt.
this line is just poetic beauty-
life's sun is gently sinking,
In a purple west whose shadows hide the land we may not see-> love it
very nicely done Raoul,
xo
Kiki
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2013
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Thank you very much Kiki once again. Really glad you like this and the extra star from you is a delight! R, xx
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
This was a wonderful breath of fresh air.
A nice contest entry. Easy flowing and gentle to read.
This is a different type ofmpiece for you and I like it
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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This was a wonderful breath of fresh air.
A nice contest entry. Easy flowing and gentle to read.
This is a different type ofmpiece for you and I like it
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Thanks Barb. Took a lot of time and contemplation to write this! R
Comment from ronnie k
Those that dare to walk without faith may find this dark but WE know that there is nothing in the promise of God but joy and peace, we go to the light!Amen love this "........night come if the day has been a story"
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Those that dare to walk without faith may find this dark but WE know that there is nothing in the promise of God but joy and peace, we go to the light!Amen love this "........night come if the day has been a story"
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Thanks so much Ronnie for your generous review and kind words. I appreciate it! R
Comment from ruhama
Your poem about the end of life is exquisite. It targets the goals we humans wish to achieve in life while allowing the reader room to reflect on his personal life. Appreciated the use of alliteration sought the sun, many men. Your poem flows as does life. A poem I will reread. Keep writing
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Your poem about the end of life is exquisite. It targets the goals we humans wish to achieve in life while allowing the reader room to reflect on his personal life. Appreciated the use of alliteration sought the sun, many men. Your poem flows as does life. A poem I will reread. Keep writing
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Wow! Thanks Ruhama for the generous review. I very much appreciate your words too! R
Comment from Zue65
Nice rhyming lines packed with nuggets of wisdom, about reflections of what have been accomplished so far,about battles fought and won, about journey with friends and how they relate somehow when we faced God eventually after pour death. Well done.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Nice rhyming lines packed with nuggets of wisdom, about reflections of what have been accomplished so far,about battles fought and won, about journey with friends and how they relate somehow when we faced God eventually after pour death. Well done.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Thanks for the review and kind words. Glad they struck a chord! R
Comment from Solitude Poet
Hey there!
You beautifully explicit in the poem through your words...
Good and excellent contest entry! :)
ALl the best and stay tuned for the results! :)
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Hey there!
You beautifully explicit in the poem through your words...
Good and excellent contest entry! :)
ALl the best and stay tuned for the results! :)
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Thanks for the review and kind words. Glad they struck a chord! R
Comment from The Death
You have well captured the feelings of a person whose end is near.
The questions and self analysis he makes has been narrated well.
It makes one think that have they really lived a worthy life.it is a well penned write
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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You have well captured the feelings of a person whose end is near.
The questions and self analysis he makes has been narrated well.
It makes one think that have they really lived a worthy life.it is a well penned write
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Thanks for the review and kind words. Glad they struck a chord! R
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
For the life has been worth living that has taught these things to you.
So what matter when the night come if the day has been a story
Good lines that speak to me as an old woman without much time left here. Yes, I had a good life, better than most, I think. No complaints are warranted.
Good inspirational poetry here!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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For the life has been worth living that has taught these things to you.
So what matter when the night come if the day has been a story
Good lines that speak to me as an old woman without much time left here. Yes, I had a good life, better than most, I think. No complaints are warranted.
Good inspirational poetry here!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2013
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Thanks for the review and kind words. Glad they struck a chord! R