Insane
Happening in an abandoned asylum26 total reviews
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I apologize
What is this
Has it a form?
If so I do not recognize it
The lead words don't spell anything
I see no line count
Give me a clue at leadt
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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I apologize
What is this
Has it a form?
If so I do not recognize it
The lead words don't spell anything
I see no line count
Give me a clue at leadt
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Tom,
Thanks for the great review. The form is a 1-5-5-9 and it only called for one stanza, but I did multiple stanza and it's for the little shop of horrors club.
You know I am a bit of a psychopath so this poem was easy to right.
Cecilia
Comment from Tim Margetts
Love this, Cecilia.
You capture the heart of the asylum with this poem.
I considered writing a poem, but I got carried away with another story instead.
Tim x
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Love this, Cecilia.
You capture the heart of the asylum with this poem.
I considered writing a poem, but I got carried away with another story instead.
Tim x
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Tim,
Thank you for the wonderful review. I am glad you enjoyed this poem. You know I am part psychopath and that's why this poem was easy to write. Ha, Ha
Cecilia
Comment from kahpot
Excellent, yes, some of the stories you hear about these places are horrific,
even the sane could never get out, love your line "Enter at own risk" very well written in 4-line poem stanzas****kahpot
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Excellent, yes, some of the stories you hear about these places are horrific,
even the sane could never get out, love your line "Enter at own risk" very well written in 4-line poem stanzas****kahpot
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Kahpot,
Thank you for the wonderful review. Yes, back in the day it was not a good place to be. They were treated worse than an animal.
Cecilia
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is a chilling post Cecilia, as we treated people with mental health issues to badly in the past and how they must have suffered. We have more empathy these days thank goodness. A poignant post, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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This is a chilling post Cecilia, as we treated people with mental health issues to badly in the past and how they must have suffered. We have more empathy these days thank goodness. A poignant post, love Dolly x
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Dolly,
Thank you for the wonderful review. Yes, insane asylum were no joke in the past. I think they were treated worse than an animal. Sad, but true my friend.
Cecilia
Comment from BethShelby
If ever a place has been haunted, the walls likely are. There is nothing more horrible than seeing sites like this. Your poem expresses well what this picture shows. It captures the horror those souls must have endured. I'm glad there is more humane treatment these days for the mentally ill.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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If ever a place has been haunted, the walls likely are. There is nothing more horrible than seeing sites like this. Your poem expresses well what this picture shows. It captures the horror those souls must have endured. I'm glad there is more humane treatment these days for the mentally ill.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Beth,
Thank you for the excellent review. Yes, I have watched shows where they went through the history of these places. I don't know how anybody could have put a loved one in these places.
Cecilia
Comment from lyenochka
That's really scary. I always thought suffering from mental illness was so much worse than any physical one. You depicted this horrible condition in an insane asylum very well in this suite of 1-5-5-9 stanzas!
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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That's really scary. I always thought suffering from mental illness was so much worse than any physical one. You depicted this horrible condition in an insane asylum very well in this suite of 1-5-5-9 stanzas!
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Helen,
Thank you for the wonderful review. I am glad you enjoyed this poem. I tried to make it as scary as I could.
Cecilia
Comment from patcelaw
This is well written for the club event. I wish you the very best with your writing. I also wish you a wonderful weekend and may God bless you and give you the desires of his heart. Patricia.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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This is well written for the club event. I wish you the very best with your writing. I also wish you a wonderful weekend and may God bless you and give you the desires of his heart. Patricia.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Patricia,
Thank you for the wonderful review. I am glad you enjoyed it. It was a fun piece to write.
Cecilia
Comment from Carasdreams
I really loved this due to the pacing and the use of the 1 syllable word. I found that in each stanza you had made it relevant to the following words.
I also enjoyed the fact that it's a warning but also a taunt that has a threat behind it. All of which was relevant to the setting of an Asylum.
I'm sorry that I had to drop a point due the final stanza. As I mentioned, you'd given the other stanzas a relation to the first word which I really like. But, the final single syllable word just didn't fit the rest of the stanza for me. It just doesn't relate like the others did and I found it threw me off the pacing and context.
Overall, however, I really enjoyed this piece and love the way you've weaved the setting into the poem with ease.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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I really loved this due to the pacing and the use of the 1 syllable word. I found that in each stanza you had made it relevant to the following words.
I also enjoyed the fact that it's a warning but also a taunt that has a threat behind it. All of which was relevant to the setting of an Asylum.
I'm sorry that I had to drop a point due the final stanza. As I mentioned, you'd given the other stanzas a relation to the first word which I really like. But, the final single syllable word just didn't fit the rest of the stanza for me. It just doesn't relate like the others did and I found it threw me off the pacing and context.
Overall, however, I really enjoyed this piece and love the way you've weaved the setting into the poem with ease.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Carasdreams,
Thank you for the kind review. It's all good for the starts and we all have our own opinions. I thought the last stanza was okay. I am glad you enjoyed the poem.
Cecilia
Comment from royowen
Oh yes, I believe those asylums were places of horror, the trouble was on didn't need to have much wrong to be committed to the, epilepsy or Tourette's was enough, beautifully written, Cecilia, blessings Roy
Typo : (Clear) for (your) own good.
Suggestion : 5th stanza.
Run.
As fast as you can.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Oh yes, I believe those asylums were places of horror, the trouble was on didn't need to have much wrong to be committed to the, epilepsy or Tourette's was enough, beautifully written, Cecilia, blessings Roy
Typo : (Clear) for (your) own good.
Suggestion : 5th stanza.
Run.
As fast as you can.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Roy,
Thank you for the wonderful review and the correction. Only problem is if I used your suggestion it throw my syllable count off. I am glad you enjoyed the poem.
Cecilia
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That's why I wrote the solution on both counts Cecilia.
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Thank you Roy. I'm a little dense sometimes. :)
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Me too, we can help one another
Comment from EeanBlack
I had that feeling before. I'll probably have that feeling again. I'm only scared when I feel like I'm becoming part of the room itself. Good post.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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I had that feeling before. I'll probably have that feeling again. I'm only scared when I feel like I'm becoming part of the room itself. Good post.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2025
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Eean,
Thank you for the wonderful review. What did you have the feeling of? A psychopath? I think we all have a little psycho in us. Some of us more than others.
Cecilia
