Humor Script posted December 27, 2021

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Exceptional

Our New Year's resolutions

A chapter in the book Cat Tales

We Resolve . . .

by damommy

PC:  Okay, everybody gather ‘round.  We need to talk.  The new year is almost on us, and I heard Mommy talking about something called resolutions.  I didn’t know what that meant, so I Googled after she went to bed.  Resolutions are things we set ourselves to do, or not do.  In this case, it’s things we will do in the coming year.  Apparently, humans make these things and then don’t keep them.  We will keep ours.  I’m ready to hear any suggestions.   Endeavour:  Well, I don’t know about this.  I’m happy with the things the way we are.  Why mess it up?   PC:  Because, you doofus, it could be to our advantage.  For instance, I’ve made the resolution to think of more ways of tricking my way into the pantry.  Those sealed jars of treats are no problem for me.  I’ve learned how to open them quite nicely.    Endeavour:  Yeah, but you don’t share them.  If only you could figure out how to open the door once Mommy shuts it, we could all have extra treats.   Dilly:  Awww, leave ‘im alone, Endevil.  He’s skinny enough that he can stand the extra treats.  You don’t look like you’ve missed a meal, Fatso.   Endeavour:  Why, you little . . .   PC:  Stop it right now!  This is getting us nowhere.  Ende-vour isn’t fat.  He has a husky build.  Now, you lot, decide what your resolutions are going to be.   Winkyn, Blinkyn, and Nod, all speaking at once:  Me next!  Me!  Me!  Me!    Winkyn:  Hold it!  Since I’m eldest by five minutes, I will speak for my two siblings.  Number One:  We resolve to take more naps, and Number Two:  To build on our list of places to do just that.  Taking over Mommy’s bed is one we’ll keep, but we need more.  Besides, when she comes to bed, she takes up a lot of our space.  So, brothers, these are our resolutions.  Next.   Dilly:  Well, I resolve to be even more beautiful, if that’s possible.   Foster:  Aw, Dilly, I don’t think you could be more beautiful than you are.  (blush).  I resolve to being more like you guys.  Mommy’s always talking about how unflappable I am.  I resolve to be more flappable.   Dart:  I resolve to living up to my name.  I dart here, I dart there, I dart everywhere. I resolve to do more of that.   Dart, dart, dart.   PC: Oh, great.  Okay.  Since the rest of you haven’t spoken up, I’ll take it that you haven’t made any resolutions.  That being the case, we’ll meet up later, and I’ll be assigning each of you a resolution.  And you will keep it.  Amos, Andi, and Tucker, you three be thinking about what you want if you don’t want me deciding for you.  That’s it for now.  Off you go.       Write A Review Recognized This is what they get up to behind my back. (Sigh) Club entry for the "Resolutions" event in "Animal Crackers".  Locate a writing club. Pays one point and 2 member cents. You need to login or register to write reviews. It's quick! We only ask four questions to new members.