Humor Fiction posted July 15, 2021

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I'm hooked on these books: Priceless advice abounds!

Self-Help for Other People

by Elizabeth Emerald

My name is Liz and I'm a help-aholic.

I'm addicted to self-help books. The more I devour, the more I crave.

There is a plethora of stupendous support and invaluable advice pertaining to myriad challenges of momentous life events. Guaranteed, there's something out there for you, no matter the particulars of your situation.

The overarching theme is this: you are not alone in your struggles; there is immeasurable comfort to be taken in that knowledge per se.

I offer here my recent reading list for your perusal (titles paraphrased to the best of my memory)

Navigating Divorce: It sucks; hopefully even more so for that (sonofa)b!tch 

Negotiating a Settlement: Take the d!ck for all he's got

Painless Childbirth: Wanna buy the Brooklyn Bridge too?

Surviving a Colicky Infant: Wanna jump off the Brooklyn Bridge?

Raising a Transgender Child: She=>He 

Raising a Transgender Child: He=>She 

Raising a Non-Binary Child: S/He=>Neither/Nor

Overcoming Opiate Addiction: Good luck with that

When Someone You Love is an Alcoholic: A toast to your forbearance 
Compulsive Gambling; Breaking the Cycle: What are the odds?

In the course of reading these excellent books, I have arrived at a place of peace such as I've never known.

After much soul-searching, I came to realize the reason for this profound sense of well-being:

None of the subjects addressed therein are in the least pertinent to my life.

As regards the first three: been there; done that; never again.

You may rightly wonder why I take pleasure in reading books that are of no relevance whatsoever.

Schadenfreude, perhaps? (Not gonna go there.)




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