The Hair Clip
5/7/5 Senryu for Contest19 total reviews
Comment from equestrik
The final line was sure a surprise. I thought it was going to be sad and sweet but..surprised that he got poked by the hair clip. I think this is a good write for the contest.
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2020
The final line was sure a surprise. I thought it was going to be sad and sweet but..surprised that he got poked by the hair clip. I think this is a good write for the contest.
Comment Written 25-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much for your review and kind words.
Comment from June Sargent
What a powerful piece that captures the essence of loss in just a few short lines. A hair clip jabs like a sword straight to the heart. Perfect artwork. Should do well in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
What a powerful piece that captures the essence of loss in just a few short lines. A hair clip jabs like a sword straight to the heart. Perfect artwork. Should do well in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much, June, I appreciate your insightful review. It was very helpful.
Comment from Mary Vigasin
The image in your few words gives not only the picture of sadness and loss but places the reader in mourning also.
It is beautifully written
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
The image in your few words gives not only the picture of sadness and loss but places the reader in mourning also.
It is beautifully written
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much, Mary, I appreciate your insightful review. It was very helpful.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This Senryu speaks about the hair clip the murder weapon, though this is not publicly known, as funeral conducted after his death; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
This Senryu speaks about the hair clip the murder weapon, though this is not publicly known, as funeral conducted after his death; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you, the hair clip is not a murder weapon. Maybe stab was confusing. It was a sad reminder his wife was dead, the bed hadn't been made the hair clip was left behind.
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Gypsy Blue
your 5/7/5 Senryu for the Contest
The Hair Clip has a snusal meaning which is leaving me with a feeling of being super cold.
Gert
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
Hello Gypsy Blue
your 5/7/5 Senryu for the Contest
The Hair Clip has a snusal meaning which is leaving me with a feeling of being super cold.
Gert
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much, Gert :)
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You are welcome
Gert
Comment from zanya
Ouch ! the emotion of grief is tangible here - understated yet extremely powerful in its impact - the while rose illustration serves to emphasise the sense of mourning - wish I had 6 remaining ?
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
Ouch ! the emotion of grief is tangible here - understated yet extremely powerful in its impact - the while rose illustration serves to emphasise the sense of mourning - wish I had 6 remaining ?
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.
Comment from rspoet
You've written an excellent senryu for the contest
with excellent imagery.
Sad theme, but nice description of the pain of loss.
Excellent art work to match words.
Well done.
Best wishes.
Robert
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
You've written an excellent senryu for the contest
with excellent imagery.
Sad theme, but nice description of the pain of loss.
Excellent art work to match words.
Well done.
Best wishes.
Robert
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words. It means a lot coming from you, Robert.
Comment from Tate A. Davis
I absolutely love how cryptic and open to interpretation this poem is. Both in terms of narrative but also the feelings that might be invoked within the reader. I really enjoyed it.
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reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
I absolutely love how cryptic and open to interpretation this poem is. Both in terms of narrative but also the feelings that might be invoked within the reader. I really enjoyed it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.
Comment from roof35
I am new to this type of poetry and your poem like many others rather shock me. I get it though, they are supposed to be written the way. Nicely done.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
I am new to this type of poetry and your poem like many others rather shock me. I get it though, they are supposed to be written the way. Nicely done.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2020
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2020
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Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.