Moving Terror
Please read author notes first.12 total reviews
Comment from RShipp
"I was absolutely terrified at the thought of living in a long house, and trying to avoid a scalping!" Oh, to be a child again!
I believe you have meet the requirements: Write a short story (100-500 words). The story must include a child's perspective of an object or situation.
Best of luck in the "Through the eyes of a child" writing contest.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2020
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"I was absolutely terrified at the thought of living in a long house, and trying to avoid a scalping!" Oh, to be a child again!
I believe you have meet the requirements: Write a short story (100-500 words). The story must include a child's perspective of an object or situation.
Best of luck in the "Through the eyes of a child" writing contest.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2020
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Thank you very much!
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
Ah, through the eyes of a child. I could see the story being told and the lass hanging on every word. I don't think that I would have been able to contain the laugh either. I like this and enjoyed reading this humorous and well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2020
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Ah, through the eyes of a child. I could see the story being told and the lass hanging on every word. I don't think that I would have been able to contain the laugh either. I like this and enjoyed reading this humorous and well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 14-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2020
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Thank you so much! I?m glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from writer723
I used to be fascinated by history lessons in school. I really enjoyed your story and found the details you shared very engaging. I could relate to your nervousness and fear. However, I'm glad your parents were able to alleviate your anxiety somewhat. When I was nine-years-old, I had a frightful experience, too. We often fear what we don't completely understand. You expressed this reality quite well. I think a lot of people could relate to this tale.
I liked what you said about wanting to remain true to the times and your nine-year-old self. Authenticity is an admirable quality in writing. I also found myself chuckling at the end when you said you peered around the bushes just in case. That sounds so like something I would've done. Are we kindred spirits or what? LOL! Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2020
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I used to be fascinated by history lessons in school. I really enjoyed your story and found the details you shared very engaging. I could relate to your nervousness and fear. However, I'm glad your parents were able to alleviate your anxiety somewhat. When I was nine-years-old, I had a frightful experience, too. We often fear what we don't completely understand. You expressed this reality quite well. I think a lot of people could relate to this tale.
I liked what you said about wanting to remain true to the times and your nine-year-old self. Authenticity is an admirable quality in writing. I also found myself chuckling at the end when you said you peered around the bushes just in case. That sounds so like something I would've done. Are we kindred spirits or what? LOL! Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 14-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2020
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Thank you so much for such a great review! I always loved history, and the history of this whole region really is outstanding. I now live in Plattsburgh, New York, about a half an hour from where we grew up. Look up the battle of Plattsburgh and read about it. We celebrate it every year in September. I just love the story. Farm boys even ran out of their classrooms, grabbed their rifles, and joined the fight, as the Americans were outnumbered by the British. And it was on September 11th! There is a cannonball wedged into the wall of a home near the Saranac river, where the fighting took place. People putting in pools here often find arrowheads, I find that kind of stuff fascinating. I think I just was not ready for it at age nine! Thank you for all the compliments in your review. We probable are kindred spirits!
Comment from Cindy Decker
This is a very sweet story. I can imagine being that age and being frightened. Your parents handled it well.
I would have loved to live in that place. I love the history of Native Americans and would love to learn about their customs.
Best wishes and good luck in the contest!
Excellent work.
Cindy
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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This is a very sweet story. I can imagine being that age and being frightened. Your parents handled it well.
I would have loved to live in that place. I love the history of Native Americans and would love to learn about their customs.
Best wishes and good luck in the contest!
Excellent work.
Cindy
Comment Written 13-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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Thank you so much. The history around here is fascinating!
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is a cute story entry for the Through the eyes of a child writing prompt. I hope that it does well for you in the contest. Much great good luck to you!
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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This is a cute story entry for the Through the eyes of a child writing prompt. I hope that it does well for you in the contest. Much great good luck to you!
Comment Written 13-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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Thank you! I was not a very brave 9-yr old, was I? LOL
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You're welcome. You still survived!
Comment from Ben Colder
Do not apologize for using the word Indian because that is what they are. What does politics have to do with speaking the truth. You are discussing true history-American History. Be proud of your heritage.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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Do not apologize for using the word Indian because that is what they are. What does politics have to do with speaking the truth. You are discussing true history-American History. Be proud of your heritage.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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Very good response, but people just don?t like it so I was afraid to use it. I also wanted accuracy and they were NOT called Native Americans in 1966! Thank you.
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I am native american and proud to be called Indian decent. Just because a few ignorent people wish to be different let them be, Do the right thing. They have always been called Native Americans way before 1966.
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I knew they were native Americans but I did not know anyone called them that back then. We even have a few people around here fighting to change your names of some of the high school sports teams, for example Peru high school has a team called the Peru Indians. It?s creating a ruckus. Thank you so much for your insight.
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We have not lost our freedom of speach yet. But if the Dem- gets in you will along with guns rights.
Name change comes with majority voting.
Anti American who have no historical roots are always the first to wish to change our way of living.
People like myself who comes from those who have hollowed this nation and fought our wars to keep our freedom are slowly dissipating away. I am 82, been there, done that. So enjoy your freedom of speach while you still have it.
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Thank you for your wisdom.
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I happen to have a lot of Native American in my blood. By the way, you never mentioned whether or not you liked my story.
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I did and please forgive me for being so distracted by your reluctance of using the name of Indians. Being Choctaw descendant it had my mind elsewhere. Your story was and is good and I never found anything questionable.
Check out the trailer of my latest published novel. It will introduce something you may or may not know concerning the times when my Choctaw grandmother lived in a very prejudice world.
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I would love to. Send me your name after the contest is over. Thanks!
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Ben Colder
Comment from lyenochka
This is a marvelous story from a child's perspective and what's more wonderful is that it's TRUE! I remember 4th grade is the time we had to learn about native peoples in our home state (for us it was Hawaiians). I can completely understand a child putting the move into the context because of the way the teacher just blurted out that information to the whole class while covering that history! Hope you do well in the contest!
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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This is a marvelous story from a child's perspective and what's more wonderful is that it's TRUE! I remember 4th grade is the time we had to learn about native peoples in our home state (for us it was Hawaiians). I can completely understand a child putting the move into the context because of the way the teacher just blurted out that information to the whole class while covering that history! Hope you do well in the contest!
Comment Written 13-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2020
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Thank you so much for the great review. New York has a very exciting history, particularly farm boys in the area I spoke about helping win the war of 1812. I just wasn?t ready for it at age 9!
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Wow, what a story I think you have a winner here. The way you constructed your story brings our curiosity closer to the pick moment:'I was absolutely terrified at the thought of living in a long house, and trying to avoid a scalping! " I laugh so hard reading this sentence. Thank you and good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2020
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Wow, what a story I think you have a winner here. The way you constructed your story brings our curiosity closer to the pick moment:'I was absolutely terrified at the thought of living in a long house, and trying to avoid a scalping! " I laugh so hard reading this sentence. Thank you and good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 12-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2020
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Thank you so much for such a great review. I am glad you enjoyed it. It is amazing what kids? minds can conjure up!
Comment from Jeff Watkins
This is a wonderful and wonderfully written with a variety of sentence structures, excellent diction, correct mechanics--a rarity, I am discovering.
I wish I had known about this contest. I would have written about the time my daughter's brother and baby sitter told her that a monster was in the toilet. Imagine the disastrous consequences for potty training.
Jeff Watkins
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2020
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This is a wonderful and wonderfully written with a variety of sentence structures, excellent diction, correct mechanics--a rarity, I am discovering.
I wish I had known about this contest. I would have written about the time my daughter's brother and baby sitter told her that a monster was in the toilet. Imagine the disastrous consequences for potty training.
Jeff Watkins
Comment Written 12-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2020
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That would have been a great story! I have noticed they repeat themselves so watch for one or a similar one. Thanks for the good review.
Comment from Bill Pinder
Excellent true story that was told in an interesting way with humor. I enjoyed reading it and I wish you good luck in the contest. Thanks for sharing your creativity. Bill
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2020
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Excellent true story that was told in an interesting way with humor. I enjoyed reading it and I wish you good luck in the contest. Thanks for sharing your creativity. Bill
Comment Written 12-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2020
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Thank you for the good review. Oh, to be nine again.
