Reviews from

Renga Multi-Author Book

Viewing comments for Chapter 53 "Lantern"
Renga is a Japanese linked poetry 5/7/5 and 7/7

4 total reviews 
Comment from Cindy Decker
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi, Zanya! Really good poem. I thinK a moon- ful sky in winter brings hope and clarity to the cold dark void winter brings. Beautiful poem with beautiful images.
Good luck in all you write
Cindy

 Comment Written 11-Aug-2020


reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
    Thanks for that superb review zanya
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hello, Zanya,

Thank you very much for adding a chapter. Beautiful haiku following Yvette's couplet.

The rule of renga is to follow the topic of previous chapter without repeating words. Please change the word, "nature".

Also, please add my author notes so next poet knows the renga rules.

Thank you!

Chapter fifty two by Y.M. Roger

with heart open wide in love
'tis (nature's) rhythm we find

Chapter fifty three by

silvery moonbeams
shimmer  on wintry landscape
(nature's )storm lantern

Well done, my friend.


....please copy notes below....

Renga is a Japanese collaborative poetry form in which poets write alternating verses of 5-7-5 stanzas and 7-7 couplets which are linked in succession by multiple poets. Only the first chapter haiku needs a kigo (season word).

If you would like to add a chapter, please follow the following instructions

Steps to post a chapter:

click on the ADD CHAPTER icon, located above the review box.

If the last poem is a 5/7/5 haiku, write a 7/7 couplet, if the last poem is a 7/7 couplet write a 5/7/5 haiku. Write about the same theme of the previous stanza but don't repeat words.

Post your poem as usual but it will be part of the book. you can edit it and add a picture if you like. A copy will go to your portfolio and you keep your reviews.

Please, copy and paste these instructions to your author notes. Thank you.

If you need help, please contact Gypsy Blue Rose.

(If you would like to read the previous chapters, follow this link) https://www.fanstory.com/chapterdetails.jsp?id=39516

 Comment Written 11-Aug-2020


reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
    Thanks for that gentle reminder ! zanya
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Zanya, I loved your poem following Yvette. Now a haiku is always written in lower case and what is more this haiku has to be in a 5-7-5 format. I'm afraid that you'rs is a 5-8-5 format. So it's more than the 17 syllables which is the requirement for a haiku. You could write:

silvery moonbeams
shines bright on wintry landscape
nature's storm lantern

just a suggestin. Ulla:)))







 Comment Written 11-Aug-2020


reply by the author on 11-Aug-2020
    Hi Ulla, you're a star ! thanks for spotting that ! zanya
Comment from Vanna1
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a great analogy of the moon being a lantern, because it is so true. It has been said before, but you made it anew with a refreshing poem. Good presentation as well. Happy writing!

 Comment Written 11-Aug-2020


reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
    Thanks for reading zanya