Renga Multi-Author Book
Viewing comments for Chapter 53 "Lantern"Renga is a Japanese linked poetry 5/7/5 and 7/7
4 total reviews
Comment from Cindy Decker
Hi, Zanya! Really good poem. I thinK a moon- ful sky in winter brings hope and clarity to the cold dark void winter brings. Beautiful poem with beautiful images.
Good luck in all you write
Cindy
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Hi, Zanya! Really good poem. I thinK a moon- ful sky in winter brings hope and clarity to the cold dark void winter brings. Beautiful poem with beautiful images.
Good luck in all you write
Cindy
Comment Written 11-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Thanks for that superb review zanya
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello, Zanya,
Thank you very much for adding a chapter. Beautiful haiku following Yvette's couplet.
The rule of renga is to follow the topic of previous chapter without repeating words. Please change the word, "nature".
Also, please add my author notes so next poet knows the renga rules.
Thank you!
Chapter fifty two by Y.M. Roger
with heart open wide in love
'tis (nature's) rhythm we find
Chapter fifty three by
silvery moonbeams
shimmer on wintry landscape
(nature's )storm lantern
Well done, my friend.
....please copy notes below....
Renga is a Japanese collaborative poetry form in which poets write alternating verses of 5-7-5 stanzas and 7-7 couplets which are linked in succession by multiple poets. Only the first chapter haiku needs a kigo (season word).
If you would like to add a chapter, please follow the following instructions
Steps to post a chapter:
click on the ADD CHAPTER icon, located above the review box.
If the last poem is a 5/7/5 haiku, write a 7/7 couplet, if the last poem is a 7/7 couplet write a 5/7/5 haiku. Write about the same theme of the previous stanza but don't repeat words.
Post your poem as usual but it will be part of the book. you can edit it and add a picture if you like. A copy will go to your portfolio and you keep your reviews.
Please, copy and paste these instructions to your author notes. Thank you.
If you need help, please contact Gypsy Blue Rose.
(If you would like to read the previous chapters, follow this link) https://www.fanstory.com/chapterdetails.jsp?id=39516
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
|
Hello, Zanya,
Thank you very much for adding a chapter. Beautiful haiku following Yvette's couplet.
The rule of renga is to follow the topic of previous chapter without repeating words. Please change the word, "nature".
Also, please add my author notes so next poet knows the renga rules.
Thank you!
Chapter fifty two by Y.M. Roger
with heart open wide in love
'tis (nature's) rhythm we find
Chapter fifty three by
silvery moonbeams
shimmer on wintry landscape
(nature's )storm lantern
Well done, my friend.
....please copy notes below....
Renga is a Japanese collaborative poetry form in which poets write alternating verses of 5-7-5 stanzas and 7-7 couplets which are linked in succession by multiple poets. Only the first chapter haiku needs a kigo (season word).
If you would like to add a chapter, please follow the following instructions
Steps to post a chapter:
click on the ADD CHAPTER icon, located above the review box.
If the last poem is a 5/7/5 haiku, write a 7/7 couplet, if the last poem is a 7/7 couplet write a 5/7/5 haiku. Write about the same theme of the previous stanza but don't repeat words.
Post your poem as usual but it will be part of the book. you can edit it and add a picture if you like. A copy will go to your portfolio and you keep your reviews.
Please, copy and paste these instructions to your author notes. Thank you.
If you need help, please contact Gypsy Blue Rose.
(If you would like to read the previous chapters, follow this link) https://www.fanstory.com/chapterdetails.jsp?id=39516
Comment Written 11-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Thanks for that gentle reminder ! zanya
Comment from Ulla
Hi Zanya, I loved your poem following Yvette. Now a haiku is always written in lower case and what is more this haiku has to be in a 5-7-5 format. I'm afraid that you'rs is a 5-8-5 format. So it's more than the 17 syllables which is the requirement for a haiku. You could write:
silvery moonbeams
shines bright on wintry landscape
nature's storm lantern
just a suggestin. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2020
|
Hi Zanya, I loved your poem following Yvette. Now a haiku is always written in lower case and what is more this haiku has to be in a 5-7-5 format. I'm afraid that you'rs is a 5-8-5 format. So it's more than the 17 syllables which is the requirement for a haiku. You could write:
silvery moonbeams
shines bright on wintry landscape
nature's storm lantern
just a suggestin. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 11-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2020
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Hi Ulla, you're a star ! thanks for spotting that ! zanya
Comment from Vanna1
What a great analogy of the moon being a lantern, because it is so true. It has been said before, but you made it anew with a refreshing poem. Good presentation as well. Happy writing!
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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What a great analogy of the moon being a lantern, because it is so true. It has been said before, but you made it anew with a refreshing poem. Good presentation as well. Happy writing!
Comment Written 11-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020
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Thanks for reading zanya