Fernando
9-9-6-6-9 Limerick24 total reviews
Comment from humpwhistle
Very nice, lilting limerick. Nice repeated 'au' sound from 'caught' and 'applauded'--kind of a sonic bonus.
I wish you the best of luck among the voters.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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Very nice, lilting limerick. Nice repeated 'au' sound from 'caught' and 'applauded'--kind of a sonic bonus.
I wish you the best of luck among the voters.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 17-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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Thank you, Lee.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Limerick about the girl from Orlando dancing with a guy Fernando a memorable tango when her high heel shoe caught her dress the crowd still applauded.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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A very well-written Limerick about the girl from Orlando dancing with a guy Fernando a memorable tango when her high heel shoe caught her dress the crowd still applauded.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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Thank you for the lovely review.
Comment from lightink
Lol! Don't you just hate when the whole dress becomes a yarn ball right in the spot light? I think it's well written, with good Limerick rhythm. The only thing I would possibly consider is to make it even more absurd by saying 'HIS' high heels...Hmm...on second thought it might be a distasteful racial stereotype in this context.
Anyways, I enjoyed your funny little messy dance!
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reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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Lol! Don't you just hate when the whole dress becomes a yarn ball right in the spot light? I think it's well written, with good Limerick rhythm. The only thing I would possibly consider is to make it even more absurd by saying 'HIS' high heels...Hmm...on second thought it might be a distasteful racial stereotype in this context.
Anyways, I enjoyed your funny little messy dance!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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Thank you so much!
Comment from Bill Schott
This limerick, Fernando, has the general formatting and gives us a look at a dancing fiasco which is funnier in a play of manners.
Note: Though HIGH-HEEL may make sense, it makes for too many syllables in that line and throws off the beat. If you simply use HEEL, you get the same picture and have a better rhythm in your line.
her heel caught the dress,
it was really a mess;
Happy day.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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This limerick, Fernando, has the general formatting and gives us a look at a dancing fiasco which is funnier in a play of manners.
Note: Though HIGH-HEEL may make sense, it makes for too many syllables in that line and throws off the beat. If you simply use HEEL, you get the same picture and have a better rhythm in your line.
her heel caught the dress,
it was really a mess;
Happy day.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2020
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Thank you. Strict syllable criteria for this particular one. 9-9-6-6-9 is the count requested in the rules. :))
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I see. The problem with explaining limericks is it?s harder to explain beats in a line than syllables, so whoever set up this challenge took the short cut. Limericks are so hard because it?s beats, rhyme, meter, story, and humor. Hard to pull off.
