Undignified
100 words10 total reviews
Comment from lancellot
Oh, so this is a squirrel eating corn on the cob. or at least that is what it seems to be the misdirection is supposed to be. Kernels of corn. Hmm, a hundred words can make telling a story hard.
Well this was interesting.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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Oh, so this is a squirrel eating corn on the cob. or at least that is what it seems to be the misdirection is supposed to be. Kernels of corn. Hmm, a hundred words can make telling a story hard.
Well this was interesting.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review Much appreciated.
Comment from Mia Twysted
I like the ending, it seems playful and fun. However, I was very surprised when the image of a squirrel came into view because I couldn't place what the creature was doing in the being. I see a whole nothing picture in my head. It's as if there are two stories here.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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I like the ending, it seems playful and fun. However, I was very surprised when the image of a squirrel came into view because I couldn't place what the creature was doing in the being. I see a whole nothing picture in my head. It's as if there are two stories here.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Try to picture the corn being held prisoner by the squirrel and being stripped of its kernels, much like a woman being stripped of her clothes. At least, that was what i was trying to get across.
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Okay, I can see that now. That makes sense. I don't know why I couldn't get that picture right in my mind.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello my friend
Excellent entry for the The Prisoner writing prompt contest. Good flash fiction form and word count. I like the presentation too.
It's a funny story with the squirrel... :)
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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Hello my friend
Excellent entry for the The Prisoner writing prompt contest. Good flash fiction form and word count. I like the presentation too.
It's a funny story with the squirrel... :)
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Glad you enjoyed.
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is a very good entry for the The Prisoner writing prompt. It had a most unexpected ending. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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This is a very good entry for the The Prisoner writing prompt. It had a most unexpected ending. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Glad you enjoyed
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You're welcome.
Comment from Robert Zimmerman
Hello Mystery Writer.
The flash story read like crime mystery in the beginning. It sounds mean and dangerous. The best part of flash fiction is the conclusion. YOU FOOLE ME with the story.
Well Done. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Hello Mystery Writer.
The flash story read like crime mystery in the beginning. It sounds mean and dangerous. The best part of flash fiction is the conclusion. YOU FOOLE ME with the story.
Well Done. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Much appreciated.
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You're welcome.
Comment from RodG
I guess an acorn can be considered a "prisoner" if you're a squirrel, but it's a far stretch for my imagination to think of them as being stripped of their dignity.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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I guess an acorn can be considered a "prisoner" if you're a squirrel, but it's a far stretch for my imagination to think of them as being stripped of their dignity.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review.
If you picture the squirrel stripping off the corn kernels the same as a woman being strippedof her clothes it would be losing dignity.
Comment from papa55mike
I've read several entries into this contest, and I like this one. What a wonderfully written story with a good twist.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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I've read several entries into this contest, and I like this one. What a wonderfully written story with a good twist.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Glad you enjoyed.
Comment from humpwhistle
Hmmm, an ear of corn? What else has kernels? But, can an ear of corn struggle? Can any inanimate object truly struggle? For that matter, can an ear of corn be held prisoner? I guess I'm a bit confused.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Hmmm, an ear of corn? What else has kernels? But, can an ear of corn struggle? Can any inanimate object truly struggle? For that matter, can an ear of corn be held prisoner? I guess I'm a bit confused.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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When you have a squirrel's claws around you and teeth digging into you that sounds prisoner like to me.
Thanks for your review.
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If you insist.
Comment from Marjon van Bruggen
This is good! I like it a lot. Starting real cruel-like and making me shiver, it was so savage! And then, suddenly, it all turns round and it reveals to be a squirrel, foraging food for the winter. From a scary poem it becomes a rather funny one. I enjoyed it!
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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This is good! I like it a lot. Starting real cruel-like and making me shiver, it was so savage! And then, suddenly, it all turns round and it reveals to be a squirrel, foraging food for the winter. From a scary poem it becomes a rather funny one. I enjoyed it!
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Glad you enjoyed.
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Yes, I liked it. Welcome to the review.
Comment from roof35
You had me going for a minute which I am sure was your intent. This is an excellent entry for the "Prisoner" contest. I like your illustration. This is nicely done.
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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You had me going for a minute which I am sure was your intent. This is an excellent entry for the "Prisoner" contest. I like your illustration. This is nicely done.
Comment Written 30-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2020
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Thanks for your review. Good to see it got the reaction I was hoping for
