Reviews from

Are you buying?

1-6-1 poem

2 total reviews 
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Witty title explains poem--very clever--Satan selling on the road--sly humor--welcome change from the pious phrases running rampant in the spiritual genre. Cheers. LIZ

 Comment Written 24-Jul-2020

reply by the author on 24-Jul-2020
    Hello Liz, I appreciate your time and am pleased to read your wonderul review; thank you very much.
Comment from Lucy de Welles
Average
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

All elements here. Punctuation needs attention:

Are you buying Needs a questions mark: Are you buying?

The punctuation in the text is...well....You are contructing two thoughts here, but they don't make sense...

Hell on it's road,

and

satan sells well....?

If you must use these words at all, then maybe punctuating could be:

Hell:
On it's road, Satan sells.
Well?

Borderline satire.

Suggest some improvement and re-submit.

Hell:
Show and tell. Evil sells.
Well?

Hell:
Show and tell. Evils sell.
Well?

You submitted it for review, and now I've put my two cents in :) Good luck to you!


 Comment Written 23-Jul-2020

reply by the author on 24-Jul-2020
    Hello friend, I appreciate your time and the detailed, constructive review, you're very kind and helpful; I made some changes to maintain my originality; I absolutely like your, "Show and tell..." better, but I cannot use it for obvious reasons. Again, thank you and welcome to the site.
reply by Lucy de Welles on 24-Jul-2020
    That's a lot better. What about
    on it's road, satan's sell.
    It gives it a whole new dynamic...
    Thanks for taking the review with a salt shaker :)
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2020
    My friend, English is not my mother tongue. If you bear with me, "It's" with an apostrophe makes it "it is" and wouldnt' that be incorrect to say, "On it is road" Again, thank you for your time and I sincerely appreciate your suggestions.
reply by Lucy de Welles on 24-Jul-2020
    You are so right. Forgive me. I'm always tripping up on that one!
    At any rate, the poem is much better now, and in contention :)
    Have a great day!
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2020
    I thank you and you have a wonderful weekend.