The Opposition
This poem offers what the Thesaurus does not.24 total reviews
Comment from R. Hiland
This is very well done. Congratulations................................................................................................................
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2020
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This is very well done. Congratulations................................................................................................................
Comment Written 09-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for your generous review and for the stars. I am beyond thrilled.
Comment from phill doran
Hello Mary
Once more I must applaud what you have chosen to share. You have taken the brief and explored it beautifully.
You write with a grounded and readily-accessible vocabulary, and in this example you use this to take the reader to a place where they can survey a profound point, should they wish.
You have an enviable ability.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
Cheers
phill
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2020
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Hello Mary
Once more I must applaud what you have chosen to share. You have taken the brief and explored it beautifully.
You write with a grounded and readily-accessible vocabulary, and in this example you use this to take the reader to a place where they can survey a profound point, should they wish.
You have an enviable ability.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
Cheers
phill
Comment Written 09-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2020
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Dear Phil, I am overwhelmed. Thank you so very much for your generous assessment of my work, which really isn? work at all, but pure pleasure. And you have made it more so. What more can I say? Words fail.
All the best,
Mary
Comment from Bill Schott
This free verse, The Opposition, is shaped in stanzas that the reader may make an estimate of in order to draw a conclusion. The images of water and colors and the little girl all seem to work against the idea of competition. and more to the medium in which it exists.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2020
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This free verse, The Opposition, is shaped in stanzas that the reader may make an estimate of in order to draw a conclusion. The images of water and colors and the little girl all seem to work against the idea of competition. and more to the medium in which it exists.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Bill, for your thoughtful review.
Comment from Vanna1
I am not sure what the completion is... herself? I am at a loss as to what the opposite she is, at the moment you are trying to describe. Opposite of competition is cooperation. What was it you were cooperating with the ocean? Maybe I am not reading between the lines good enough... I am not the best poet. However I really like the way you are taking a subject and infusing it with metaphors and memories that is creative to use so many angles. I just think they might need a tweak to fit together more understandably.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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I am not sure what the completion is... herself? I am at a loss as to what the opposite she is, at the moment you are trying to describe. Opposite of competition is cooperation. What was it you were cooperating with the ocean? Maybe I am not reading between the lines good enough... I am not the best poet. However I really like the way you are taking a subject and infusing it with metaphors and memories that is creative to use so many angles. I just think they might need a tweak to fit together more understandably.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for your very thoughtful review.
Comment from fluffnstuff
wow...I am definitely impressed with this write of yours. I think I will reread it again to get that wonderful feeling I got after the last sentence. Sure enough it happened again. Wish you luck if this is an entry. It is great. Fluff
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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wow...I am definitely impressed with this write of yours. I think I will reread it again to get that wonderful feeling I got after the last sentence. Sure enough it happened again. Wish you luck if this is an entry. It is great. Fluff
Comment Written 07-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Wow! What a wonderful review. Thank you so much. And thank you for the six stars as well.
Comment from tfawcus
This is the most compelling poem. It clearly states an often overlooked truth that the expression of self is an endeavour from which much good and balance can spring. A non-competitive endeavour of great worth, providing it doesn't lead exclusively to narcissism!
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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This is the most compelling poem. It clearly states an often overlooked truth that the expression of self is an endeavour from which much good and balance can spring. A non-competitive endeavour of great worth, providing it doesn't lead exclusively to narcissism!
Comment Written 07-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for your kind review and for the six star rating as well. I am thrilled by your response to my poem.
Comment from Bill Pinder
Very interesting and creative free verse about the concept of competition. I'm not sure exactly what you're saying about it. Thanks for explaining it more if you choose.
Bill
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Very interesting and creative free verse about the concept of competition. I'm not sure exactly what you're saying about it. Thanks for explaining it more if you choose.
Bill
Comment Written 06-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Thanks, Bill. I will get back to you.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
This poem has a depth no others have. This poem will draw the reader in to reflect line none other has, what competition is, the pros and cons. I love the intense metaphor: " she is crayoning the colors of her soul."
This poem shows the beauty which can result in an individual simply playing for no other reason than to be playful. It is a poem I will reread, several times aloud. I would give this a 6 if I had any left to give. But I can still give it A+.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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This poem has a depth no others have. This poem will draw the reader in to reflect line none other has, what competition is, the pros and cons. I love the intense metaphor: " she is crayoning the colors of her soul."
This poem shows the beauty which can result in an individual simply playing for no other reason than to be playful. It is a poem I will reread, several times aloud. I would give this a 6 if I had any left to give. But I can still give it A+.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Liz. Your kind words are worth more than a six.
Comment from hager
Out of the box smart, taking a different drift while using tact and tack... using images constantly. Nicely done...
and Good Luck in the contest... hager
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Out of the box smart, taking a different drift while using tact and tack... using images constantly. Nicely done...
and Good Luck in the contest... hager
Comment Written 06-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for your kind words and good wishes.
Comment from Melissa Russell Deur
Because the writing prompt was "Competition," I expected this poem's title to refer to the opposing team, as in a physical sport. It turns out the "Opposition" is the team of people in a child's life who try to get the child to conform, to color within the lines, to focus on the end result. The form of the poem reminds me of the "girl coloring row after row of wavering lines," like incoming ocean waves. But the jaggedness of the visual form also makes me think of creative people who are so depressed about being stifled and misunderstood that they cut themselves. I like the image chosen for this poem because it evokes the dreamy, peaceful, in-the-flow moment of the young artist coloring for the pure joy of doing it. Lovely!
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Because the writing prompt was "Competition," I expected this poem's title to refer to the opposing team, as in a physical sport. It turns out the "Opposition" is the team of people in a child's life who try to get the child to conform, to color within the lines, to focus on the end result. The form of the poem reminds me of the "girl coloring row after row of wavering lines," like incoming ocean waves. But the jaggedness of the visual form also makes me think of creative people who are so depressed about being stifled and misunderstood that they cut themselves. I like the image chosen for this poem because it evokes the dreamy, peaceful, in-the-flow moment of the young artist coloring for the pure joy of doing it. Lovely!
Comment Written 06-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Thank you so much for your thoughtful review.
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You are welcome and you should win!
