Psych Out News
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "Man Made Fire Tornado Kills Five"Fake News Stories
9 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written story about the disastrous experiment with a tornado created by a teenager and left five dead and sixteen injured because of nineteen year old teenager's courage to try something no one believes to be possible.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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A very well-written story about the disastrous experiment with a tornado created by a teenager and left five dead and sixteen injured because of nineteen year old teenager's courage to try something no one believes to be possible.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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Thank you for your review.
Comment from F. William Lester
You've presented an interesting slant on the moonshine business. I enjoyed the story and understood the humor you were projecting. However, I felt that the it was stilted and forced at times. Maybe contrasting Ahmad's Egyptian culture with the Kentucky moonshine culture more would give you a better avenue for humor than relying on the Kentucky backwoods humor, which to me can be overused and threadbare. It's a good story with a lot of potential.
Good luck. Good writing. Thank you for allowing me to read your work.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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You've presented an interesting slant on the moonshine business. I enjoyed the story and understood the humor you were projecting. However, I felt that the it was stilted and forced at times. Maybe contrasting Ahmad's Egyptian culture with the Kentucky moonshine culture more would give you a better avenue for humor than relying on the Kentucky backwoods humor, which to me can be overused and threadbare. It's a good story with a lot of potential.
Good luck. Good writing. Thank you for allowing me to read your work.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2020
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It was made to sound like a news report you would hear on television. Thank you for your review I appreciate your comments and will work on it not sounding so forced.
Comment from Bichon
This was an interesting story indeed. Although it's a humorous flash fiction, I wouldn't be surprised if something like this did happen someday in the future!
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2020
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This was an interesting story indeed. Although it's a humorous flash fiction, I wouldn't be surprised if something like this did happen someday in the future!
Comment Written 05-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2020
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Wouldn't that be something.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your story is interesting with good details and character development. I enjoyed reading it. However, I don't believe I would categorize it as 'humor.' I did not read anything that was humorous. Thanks for sharing.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2020
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Your story is interesting with good details and character development. I enjoyed reading it. However, I don't believe I would categorize it as 'humor.' I did not read anything that was humorous. Thanks for sharing.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 03-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2020
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It's humor in that something like that has like a 1% change of happening. Or at least that is how I see it.
I am however, glad that it was entertaining.
Comment from Mistydawn
What a strange occurrence. You wouldn't think it'd work or that it'd do what it did. This is a freak accident for sure. Your story is well-written, very interesting. What a story those have to tell their kids about the day they got engaged lol.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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What a strange occurrence. You wouldn't think it'd work or that it'd do what it did. This is a freak accident for sure. Your story is well-written, very interesting. What a story those have to tell their kids about the day they got engaged lol.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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I am glad you liked it.
Comment from Sumpta
Quite a pity the level of damage caused by this simple act.
It is well with all those who got affected and to the family that will have to rebuild and repay.
Well done dear writer.
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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Quite a pity the level of damage caused by this simple act.
It is well with all those who got affected and to the family that will have to rebuild and repay.
Well done dear writer.
Comment Written 03-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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Thank you
Comment from Gloria ....
Oh the premise of this humour fiction tale is a delicious fare of irony, given that Ahmad was an exchange student hoping to help his host family's moonshine production. Liquor it Up Distributors is a brilliant name and also creating a tornado a home with a few fits of this and a high-speed fan is no mean feat.
A most imaginative tale and I can understand how the story made the news. And a marriage in it all creates a nice happy ending too.
One small typo:
riding an electric ell (eel) to see it work.
Great work and many thanks for sharing your humour. :))
Gloria
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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Oh the premise of this humour fiction tale is a delicious fare of irony, given that Ahmad was an exchange student hoping to help his host family's moonshine production. Liquor it Up Distributors is a brilliant name and also creating a tornado a home with a few fits of this and a high-speed fan is no mean feat.
A most imaginative tale and I can understand how the story made the news. And a marriage in it all creates a nice happy ending too.
One small typo:
riding an electric ell (eel) to see it work.
Great work and many thanks for sharing your humour. :))
Gloria
Comment Written 02-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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I am glad you liked it. Thank you for catching the typo.
Comment from Stephen Force
Yeeee Haaah, this ain't what you might call pohlitcally cohrrect:) It was however very funny and entertaining. I think you captured the feeling of a news clip or news paper article very well, I loved the backwoods feel of this story, great job. One small note electric ell -->eel (end of 2nd paragraph) Steve
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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Yeeee Haaah, this ain't what you might call pohlitcally cohrrect:) It was however very funny and entertaining. I think you captured the feeling of a news clip or news paper article very well, I loved the backwoods feel of this story, great job. One small note electric ell -->eel (end of 2nd paragraph) Steve
Comment Written 02-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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I am glad you liked it. Thanks for finding the typo
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is a great humor flash fiction! You wrote just like a genuine reporter. This chapter is very well written, no mistakes ir typos that I saw. Well done!
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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This is a great humor flash fiction! You wrote just like a genuine reporter. This chapter is very well written, no mistakes ir typos that I saw. Well done!
Comment Written 02-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 03-Jun-2020
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Thank you for your review.
