Oh Life!
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Devils!"Experiences of living
107 total reviews
Comment from Swtdreamz
Want more, more and more somehow
Rationality where? - between desire and illusion- doubt there'd be rationality
Concord or balance! Nay you
Devils wish all that you see! - yes but being bad can be so fun
good job
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Want more, more and more somehow
Rationality where? - between desire and illusion- doubt there'd be rationality
Concord or balance! Nay you
Devils wish all that you see! - yes but being bad can be so fun
good job
Comment Written 29-May-2006
Comment from Irina
You tease me again, ALCREATOR WRITER! With the tanka this time!
I adore all tankas, haikus, chokas and other forms of Japan poetry... Your tanka is absolutely beautiful!
Thank you for sharing!
Irina
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You tease me again, ALCREATOR WRITER! With the tanka this time!
I adore all tankas, haikus, chokas and other forms of Japan poetry... Your tanka is absolutely beautiful!
Thank you for sharing!
Irina
Comment Written 29-May-2006
Comment from mamre07
You are touching the kust of the eyes, flesh and the pride of life. The coveteous mind id never satisfied with all the blessings that are available.
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You are touching the kust of the eyes, flesh and the pride of life. The coveteous mind id never satisfied with all the blessings that are available.
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from cheyennewy
I think it is true that devils are everywhere...they are there to torment and temp us. Great tanka with good rhythm and flow of well chosen words. You are definitely talented at writing these terse poems....well done...cheyenne
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I think it is true that devils are everywhere...they are there to torment and temp us. Great tanka with good rhythm and flow of well chosen words. You are definitely talented at writing these terse poems....well done...cheyenne
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from tuskantail
I like your line of thought here and the message you give 'Devils wish all that you see.' We all seem to fall into this trap, wanting things we don't need just for the sake of having them. I enjoyed.
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I like your line of thought here and the message you give 'Devils wish all that you see.' We all seem to fall into this trap, wanting things we don't need just for the sake of having them. I enjoyed.
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from Patty Mazzurco
Okay I feel like I'm repeating myself here and of course I am...lol but you did another great job here. Perfect format and written in clear and understanding way. Nice work!
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Okay I feel like I'm repeating myself here and of course I am...lol but you did another great job here. Perfect format and written in clear and understanding way. Nice work!
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from orozco123
This poem had a good flow to it. I was also pleased with message behind the carefully selected words. I would not change a thing about this poem it is perfect the way it is. I thought the color scheme added to the words.
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This poem had a good flow to it. I was also pleased with message behind the carefully selected words. I would not change a thing about this poem it is perfect the way it is. I thought the color scheme added to the words.
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from Pseudoname
AW,
So this is a warning to avoid the scarred and well-walked road to perdition, eh? I'll try to keep that message in mind as the battle for good and evil continues to be wage all around me. It's everywhere!
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AW,
So this is a warning to avoid the scarred and well-walked road to perdition, eh? I'll try to keep that message in mind as the battle for good and evil continues to be wage all around me. It's everywhere!
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from VICTIMEYES
wow, ok you kinda left me out there on a teeter totter with this, maybe that was your goal, anyway i'm coming around the corner of understanding, with this i hope, i concluded these devils you speak of, if they would only apply a little of this thing calle rationale they wouldn't desire or fall for the illusions that are put forth into the world, i like the writing any how.
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wow, ok you kinda left me out there on a teeter totter with this, maybe that was your goal, anyway i'm coming around the corner of understanding, with this i hope, i concluded these devils you speak of, if they would only apply a little of this thing calle rationale they wouldn't desire or fall for the illusions that are put forth into the world, i like the writing any how.
Comment Written 28-May-2006
Comment from Gresenle
Rationality where? - this is six syllables, which ruins the tanka.
I liked the beginning, esp. the more, more line
This part "Concord or balance! Nay you" seemed odd since concord and balance are not opposites or mutually exclusive. Maybe "Concord or balance?" would fit your meaning better.
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Rationality where? - this is six syllables, which ruins the tanka.
I liked the beginning, esp. the more, more line
This part "Concord or balance! Nay you" seemed odd since concord and balance are not opposites or mutually exclusive. Maybe "Concord or balance?" would fit your meaning better.
Comment Written 28-May-2006
