The party's over
She thought he loved her10 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This twenty-five-syllable poem, The Party's Over, has the proper syllable count and an early evening for the girl with the ex.
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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This twenty-five-syllable poem, The Party's Over, has the proper syllable count and an early evening for the girl with the ex.
Comment Written 11-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Thanks Bill
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello my friend
The party's over...is a nice poem. Good syllable count. Presentation is pretty. The lines don't flow well.
She leaves(no grammatical connection)
It's just midnight
The party's not over.(you use a period and a line space but sentence continue)
It is for her(abrupt stop without period)
She sees him
Kissing
Another girl.
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Hello my friend
The party's over...is a nice poem. Good syllable count. Presentation is pretty. The lines don't flow well.
She leaves(no grammatical connection)
It's just midnight
The party's not over.(you use a period and a line space but sentence continue)
It is for her(abrupt stop without period)
She sees him
Kissing
Another girl.
Comment Written 11-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Thanks
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
Yeah, that's when the party is over. The main reason, or one of the main reasons you're there is because of him. The other reason is obvious. You want to be seen and complimented about how good you look. Also, to make the other girls in attendance jealous. I love the message conveyed in this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Yeah, that's when the party is over. The main reason, or one of the main reasons you're there is because of him. The other reason is obvious. You want to be seen and complimented about how good you look. Also, to make the other girls in attendance jealous. I love the message conveyed in this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 11-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Thanks Jeffrey. X
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A gentle delivery here of a tragic situation of betrayal that can cut like a knife, few words speaking of the chaos that will no doubt ensue, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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A gentle delivery here of a tragic situation of betrayal that can cut like a knife, few words speaking of the chaos that will no doubt ensue, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 11-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Thanks Dolly. X
Comment from Debbie Pope
Well done use of 25 syllables. You tell an age old story that everyone can relate to. I also love your photo. It takes me back.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Well done use of 25 syllables. You tell an age old story that everyone can relate to. I also love your photo. It takes me back.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 10-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2020
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Many thanks Debbie
Comment from Mia Twysted
Oh I pity her and her heart, but most I pity the man when he tried to find her again and I imagine releases the anger that will build up within her.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2020
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Oh I pity her and her heart, but most I pity the man when he tried to find her again and I imagine releases the anger that will build up within her.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2020
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Many thanks
Comment from victor 66
No matter how intelligent we think we are, love has a way of getting in the way of our common sense. What comes to mind is, why would a person really want another person that doesn't want them? A nice story in a small poem.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2020
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No matter how intelligent we think we are, love has a way of getting in the way of our common sense. What comes to mind is, why would a person really want another person that doesn't want them? A nice story in a small poem.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2020
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Many thanks Victor
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You are most welcome, and it was my pleasure.
Comment from shade1
I believe many of us can relate to this and you picture it very well. I love the picture, it tells the story in one second. Very much enjoyed reading it x shadé
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2020
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I believe many of us can relate to this and you picture it very well. I love the picture, it tells the story in one second. Very much enjoyed reading it x shadé
Comment Written 09-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2020
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many thanks
Comment from RodG
I like this short narrative poem. You pack a lot of story-line into only twenty-five syllables. In addition, you set the scene, introduce three characters and launch a plot in only seven lines. Well done!
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2020
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I like this short narrative poem. You pack a lot of story-line into only twenty-five syllables. In addition, you set the scene, introduce three characters and launch a plot in only seven lines. Well done!
Comment Written 09-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2020
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Many thanks. Rod.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written 25 syllable poem you have penned for the contest. You used very good descriptive words that went perfect with the art work you chose. Best wishes in the contest. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2020
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This is a very well written 25 syllable poem you have penned for the contest. You used very good descriptive words that went perfect with the art work you chose. Best wishes in the contest. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 09-Mar-2020
reply by the author on 09-Mar-2020
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Thanks Teri
