Reviews from

Poor Peter

He's so forlorn with no lawn

8 total reviews 
Comment from robyn corum
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Jen,

hahahaha Okay, okay - yeah, it's a little silly, but I like it. It's just the right amount of silly and quirky and I am the queen of quirky. haha

Nice job. Thanks for the smile and good luck!

 Comment Written 17-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
    Thanks for the great review Robyn. Cheers. Jen x
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
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I wouldn't be to happy about that after I've paid for seed and threw it out. I would be thinking about running them off although, they'd just come right back. Thanks for sharing this well written work. Well done!

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
    Tnanks Jeffrey
Comment from Sharon Haiste
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I think this is a good entry for the 5-7-5 Bye Bye Blackbird writing prompt.
This short verse tells a good story about the seed stealing birds.
Well done and I wish you luck with the contest.
Sharon

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 16-Feb-2020
    Thanks Sharon
Comment from moongirlwriter
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Yes, that is the way of Mother Nature. . .my sister does that with the deer that come to visit her garden, she now grows her garden in pots on the deck, close to the house. Best of luck to you with this writing, it made me smile and gave me a chuckle.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
    Thanks a lot.
reply by moongirlwriter on 15-Feb-2020
    :)
reply by moongirlwriter on 15-Feb-2020
    :)
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
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Hello, my friend,

Good job with the 5/7/5 bye bye blackbird contest. Your syllable count is right. The poem is about birds. Good luck in the contest.

Gypsy

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
    Thanks.
Comment from Mark D. R.
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You created a terrific play on words for your concluding line. Your selected FanArt helps to reinforce your poem. I am a big fan of using FanArtists whenever I post.

Good luck in this contest.

P.S. Since you used "forlorn" in your subtitle, consider editing to 'for-lawn' without caps.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
    Thanks for the review and the helpful suggestion. I've changed it.
reply by Mark D. R. on 15-Feb-2020
    Pleased you made the change, but consider bracketing those words with single quotes. Methinks your intended pun will then be reinforced even more (-:
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
    Thanks
Comment from RodG
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I remember being a Peter, hoping I could get a lawn to grow only to be frustrated by scads of greedy birds. Good use of alliteration in line one and your play-on-words in line three is delightful. Rod

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
    Many thanks Rid
Comment from ImaginosBuzzardoDesdinova
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A lovely poem ended with a wonderful pun. Some people might groan, but sometimes a pun makes a lovely ending. So many birds love seeds. Especially grass seeds. It's a wonder anyone has a lawn at all.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2020


reply by the author on 15-Feb-2020
    Many thanks fir the review