Sleep
Free verse17 total reviews
Comment from royowen
I get about 5-6 hours a day, but I quite often sleep in the day. I'm sure you're OK, but an amazing amount of people don get much sleep. Well done Carol, this is and excellent work, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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I get about 5-6 hours a day, but I quite often sleep in the day. I'm sure you're OK, but an amazing amount of people don get much sleep. Well done Carol, this is and excellent work, blessings Roy
Comment Written 02-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much, Roy!
Caro
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Well done
Comment from juliaSjames
I liked your stream of consciousness write, Carol. Punctuation would have hindered its flow. Line breaks are more than sufficient for comprehension.
You capture the restlessness and acute hearing of insomnia very well. At night time changes when one is awake in bed. A minute seems like an hour.
I used to have cat companions. Excellent as sleep aids. Until they nip you awake in the early hours because they want to be let out.
Hope your sleeping pattern is back to normal.
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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I liked your stream of consciousness write, Carol. Punctuation would have hindered its flow. Line breaks are more than sufficient for comprehension.
You capture the restlessness and acute hearing of insomnia very well. At night time changes when one is awake in bed. A minute seems like an hour.
I used to have cat companions. Excellent as sleep aids. Until they nip you awake in the early hours because they want to be let out.
Hope your sleeping pattern is back to normal.
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 02-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much, Julia :))
Carol
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Naaah.. on free verse, I really prefer to let the format (line spacings, returns) do the 'punctuation' for you... makes the form more 'free' while still 'directing' the reader.. ;) Enjoyed the mind's wondering in those moments before slumber... ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Naaah.. on free verse, I really prefer to let the format (line spacings, returns) do the 'punctuation' for you... makes the form more 'free' while still 'directing' the reader.. ;) Enjoyed the mind's wondering in those moments before slumber... ;) Yvette
Comment Written 02-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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I can't decide, honestly. But trying this for fun :))
Carol
Comment from w.j.debi
Sounds like some nights I've had. I know I need to drift off; I've had a busy and hectic day; logically I should be exhausted. Yep, you captured the feeling precisely. Love the artwork to support your theme.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Sounds like some nights I've had. I know I need to drift off; I've had a busy and hectic day; logically I should be exhausted. Yep, you captured the feeling precisely. Love the artwork to support your theme.
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Thanks Debi, I lucked out finding that picture. I kind of hate having to use pictures in a way, but it does add to the visual appeal.
Carol
Comment from Mrs. KT
Hello Carol!
Your lack of punctuation didn't "bug" me at all! I love to write free verse sans punctuation. Reads so very well aloud.
On a personal note, apparently last evening I was having "one heck" of a nightmare, and I screamed aloud! My poor husband! I have no problems falling asleep, but I do believe my husband does! :)
I actually am quite fond of those nights when sleep does not come readily; I do my best writing ... in my mind...then!
Wonderful imagery!
Thank you for sharing!
diane
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Hello Carol!
Your lack of punctuation didn't "bug" me at all! I love to write free verse sans punctuation. Reads so very well aloud.
On a personal note, apparently last evening I was having "one heck" of a nightmare, and I screamed aloud! My poor husband! I have no problems falling asleep, but I do believe my husband does! :)
I actually am quite fond of those nights when sleep does not come readily; I do my best writing ... in my mind...then!
Wonderful imagery!
Thank you for sharing!
diane
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Oh no, your poor husband - and you too! I used to have nightmares, it is awful. Those nights when I couldn't sleep my husband was making the most annoying breathing sounds (the jumping frogs). I had to go in the spare room!
Carol
Comment from BeasPeas
Hi Carol. This is an enjoyable poem. I don't mind the "no punctuation" thing. Sometimes it works well for us, as it does here. These are the best lines for me:
"my body restless as dry grass
not heavy enough for sleep
and I worry that I'm
not needful enough of oblivion"
Marilyn
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Hi Carol. This is an enjoyable poem. I don't mind the "no punctuation" thing. Sometimes it works well for us, as it does here. These are the best lines for me:
"my body restless as dry grass
not heavy enough for sleep
and I worry that I'm
not needful enough of oblivion"
Marilyn
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Thanks Marilyn, I kind of liked the dry grass too, and not being heavy enough to sink into the bed comfortably. (sigh).
Carol
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello Carol - you always write a very good free verse. This I can identify with - I go to bed, sometimes exhausted, then lie thinking and cannot sleep. Your work is very descriptive. 'the night like black velvet' - good use of simile here. I love the ending of this piece - ' I worry that I'm not needful enough of oblivion a kind of letting go that is just one step shy
of heaven' - lovely - and good use of metaphor. Well done - lovely read. Dorothy xx
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Hello Carol - you always write a very good free verse. This I can identify with - I go to bed, sometimes exhausted, then lie thinking and cannot sleep. Your work is very descriptive. 'the night like black velvet' - good use of simile here. I love the ending of this piece - ' I worry that I'm not needful enough of oblivion a kind of letting go that is just one step shy
of heaven' - lovely - and good use of metaphor. Well done - lovely read. Dorothy xx
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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Thanks so much Dorothy. I'm sleeping okay recently but have had some nights without much sleep a few weeks ago.
Carol
Comment from Ulla
Hi Carol, I loved your free verse poem and I find it quite right that there's no punctuation. How many of us don't know those pointless nights when sleep eludes us to some silly thoughts. I liked it a lot. Your wonderful descriptive words make it so clear. Ulla xx
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Hi Carol, I loved your free verse poem and I find it quite right that there's no punctuation. How many of us don't know those pointless nights when sleep eludes us to some silly thoughts. I liked it a lot. Your wonderful descriptive words make it so clear. Ulla xx
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thanks so much, Ulla!
Carol
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
This is n interesting trial, Carol. I had to read it 2 times to make sure I read it correctly without the punctuation. I believe each author may present as their choice, but I miss the punctuation. Your words flow well with great imagery. Your image is a great pairing with those words, too. I like the last 2 lines. Thanks for sharing. Respectfully with Love and Admiration, Jan
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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This is n interesting trial, Carol. I had to read it 2 times to make sure I read it correctly without the punctuation. I believe each author may present as their choice, but I miss the punctuation. Your words flow well with great imagery. Your image is a great pairing with those words, too. I like the last 2 lines. Thanks for sharing. Respectfully with Love and Admiration, Jan
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2020
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I know Jim is not a fan of leaving out punctuation. Just thought I'd try it as a poet friend of mine NEVER uses punctuation (not on the site).
Thanks Jan!
Carol
Comment from Joan E.
What an intriguing artwork and I appreciate minimalism! I could certainly relate to your vivid description of sleeplessness. I especially liked the "restless as dry grass" simile. Smiles- Joan
P.S. Best wishes with the in-laws (ours are all gone).
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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What an intriguing artwork and I appreciate minimalism! I could certainly relate to your vivid description of sleeplessness. I especially liked the "restless as dry grass" simile. Smiles- Joan
P.S. Best wishes with the in-laws (ours are all gone).
Comment Written 01-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Lol, I hate insomnia!! Been having it this week too :((
Carol
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Sometimes deep breathing exercises help. Best wishes- Joan
