Ghost Dad
Massie's dad comes back.8 total reviews
Comment from Raffaelina Lowcock
Nicely portrayed. If only it was possible, wouldn't it set our minds at ease to hear that they made it into a place where all was well? I would love to see my father again and the aura in your story gives me the feeling of a wonderful satisfaction in the knowing. Well done
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2019
Nicely portrayed. If only it was possible, wouldn't it set our minds at ease to hear that they made it into a place where all was well? I would love to see my father again and the aura in your story gives me the feeling of a wonderful satisfaction in the knowing. Well done
Comment Written 18-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2019
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Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
This is a cute ghost story. I've heard many times of people seeing deceased loved ones. I don't think that I'd like that to much. I like what you've done with this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2019
This is a cute ghost story. I've heard many times of people seeing deceased loved ones. I don't think that I'd like that to much. I like what you've done with this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 18-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2019
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Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from lyenochka
It's a story that everyone who is missing a parent wishes for - to connect one more time with them even as a ghost.
Comments:
There are lots of references to 'dad' and when it's used as a proper name, it should be capitalized. But when it's used as a noun, it's not. Example--
""Yes, it's me. Your dad!" dad responded." (Dad responded. Because Dad is used instead of a name.
"her dad left up to Heaven" (Her) as it begins a sentence
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
It's a story that everyone who is missing a parent wishes for - to connect one more time with them even as a ghost.
Comments:
There are lots of references to 'dad' and when it's used as a proper name, it should be capitalized. But when it's used as a noun, it's not. Example--
""Yes, it's me. Your dad!" dad responded." (Dad responded. Because Dad is used instead of a name.
"her dad left up to Heaven" (Her) as it begins a sentence
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
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Thank you! I have fixed the mistakes. I'm so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from oliver818
What a sad story. LosinG a parent is a terrible thing so I guess having them come back to say hi, I'm ok, would be an amazing experience. Thanks for sharing this and have a great day
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
What a sad story. LosinG a parent is a terrible thing so I guess having them come back to say hi, I'm ok, would be an amazing experience. Thanks for sharing this and have a great day
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
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Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed my story!
Comment from nor84
Here's a tip. When there are only two characters in a scene, you don't need speech tags after you establish who speaks first. A reader can follow a two-way conversation for some distance. So, when dad responds, he says, "Yes, it's me." And no speech tag is needed.
Then you change back to the other character without attaching a tag to that line of dialog. It's obvious who is speaking and who is responding. No more tags needed at all.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
Here's a tip. When there are only two characters in a scene, you don't need speech tags after you establish who speaks first. A reader can follow a two-way conversation for some distance. So, when dad responds, he says, "Yes, it's me." And no speech tag is needed.
Then you change back to the other character without attaching a tag to that line of dialog. It's obvious who is speaking and who is responding. No more tags needed at all.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
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Thanks! Thank you for the Advice! I will keep that in mind. I'm glad you enjoyed my story!
Comment from w.j.debi
What a sweet ghost story. It was kind of her dad to come back and comfort his daughter and let her know that everything was alright. He will always be watching over her. That's the kind of ghost I like hearing about.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
What a sweet ghost story. It was kind of her dad to come back and comfort his daughter and let her know that everything was alright. He will always be watching over her. That's the kind of ghost I like hearing about.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
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Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Darlene Franklin
I don't know how many/any people have had a story quite like this one, but I know it's common for our dead loved ones to appear in our dreams. Those visits encouraged me. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
I don't know how many/any people have had a story quite like this one, but I know it's common for our dead loved ones to appear in our dreams. Those visits encouraged me. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
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Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from Earl Corp
This was an unusual twist to a ghost story. I liked the positive aspect of dad watching over her forever. I guess true love never really dies. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
This was an unusual twist to a ghost story. I liked the positive aspect of dad watching over her forever. I guess true love never really dies. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2019
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2019
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Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed my story!