Childhood Memories
Disney Parks and Universal Studios Parks.27 total reviews
Comment from Darlene Franklin
I went to Disney World three times, all of them as an adult. And I absoutely loved it. I almost think it's lost on the kids! Thanks for b ringing back a wonderful memory
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2019
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I went to Disney World three times, all of them as an adult. And I absoutely loved it. I almost think it's lost on the kids! Thanks for b ringing back a wonderful memory
Comment Written 03-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2019
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Thank you and you're welcome! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay! :)
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Wow. you gave me a reviewer vote for my simple review. Thank you.
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BTW, I'm guessing English is a second language for you. It shows sometime in your stories. This one flowed smoothly, one of the better stories I've read from you as you shared an all-American experience. Well done! (I hope this doesn't offend you.)
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Don't worry, it doesn't offend me at all. I'm happy that you enjoyed my essay! :)
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You're welcome.
Comment from jaydub99
I enjoyed your obvious passion and youthful romp through the theme parks of Disney. Your essay seemed a little choppy and perhaps some of the sentences could be combined instead of short independent ones. Your imagery was good and the picture added to the story rather than detract as many do. Overall it was a good essay perhaps some edits to spruce it up.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2019
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I enjoyed your obvious passion and youthful romp through the theme parks of Disney. Your essay seemed a little choppy and perhaps some of the sentences could be combined instead of short independent ones. Your imagery was good and the picture added to the story rather than detract as many do. Overall it was a good essay perhaps some edits to spruce it up.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2019
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Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed my essay! Thanks for the advice!
Comment from Barbaraj1
A very nice childhood memory. I enjoyed reading about Disneyland.
I still enjoy going there as a child.
Your essay is very good, but maybe tighter editing will help.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2019
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A very nice childhood memory. I enjoyed reading about Disneyland.
I still enjoy going there as a child.
Your essay is very good, but maybe tighter editing will help.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2019
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Thank you! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay! Thanks for the advice.
Comment from Wabigoon
Raul--
I like hearing about the theme parks. I went to Disney World Orlando many years ago and enjoyed it. You know what struck me? How there's a whole "underpark" beneath the surface where all the workers do their thing -- only an occasional...entrance from down there up into the park. Like dreaming was my feeling, and, in a way, reality.
I think, however, you write this a bit like kid doing a "what I did over my summer" presentation to his class in school. Needs maybe, to be more sophisticated somehow. And there are places you could cut some words. Not that it's too long, but words that are not necessary.
Thanks, enjoyed it
Best
Wabigoon/Jeff
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Raul--
I like hearing about the theme parks. I went to Disney World Orlando many years ago and enjoyed it. You know what struck me? How there's a whole "underpark" beneath the surface where all the workers do their thing -- only an occasional...entrance from down there up into the park. Like dreaming was my feeling, and, in a way, reality.
I think, however, you write this a bit like kid doing a "what I did over my summer" presentation to his class in school. Needs maybe, to be more sophisticated somehow. And there are places you could cut some words. Not that it's too long, but words that are not necessary.
Thanks, enjoyed it
Best
Wabigoon/Jeff
Comment Written 02-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Thank you and you're welcome! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Miranda Langston
I think this could be a fantastic piece with a bit of editing. Besides a comma here and there, I think elongating your sentences would make you sound a lot more eloquent and make your stories much better. Don't get me wrong, it's a very nice story, and I love the part about the Peter Pan ride :) I went on it with my mom one time when I was a little girl, turned around at Big Ben, and said "Teach me to fly, Wendy." :D Best of luck in your future writing endeavers and keep up the good work, my friend
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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I think this could be a fantastic piece with a bit of editing. Besides a comma here and there, I think elongating your sentences would make you sound a lot more eloquent and make your stories much better. Don't get me wrong, it's a very nice story, and I love the part about the Peter Pan ride :) I went on it with my mom one time when I was a little girl, turned around at Big Ben, and said "Teach me to fly, Wendy." :D Best of luck in your future writing endeavers and keep up the good work, my friend
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Thank you, my friend! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay! :)
Comment from kahpot
What a wonderful story and ride you have taken the reader on here, especially for those of us who have never been or had such an experience, very well written and thank you for sharing, best wishes for your contest****kahpot
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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What a wonderful story and ride you have taken the reader on here, especially for those of us who have never been or had such an experience, very well written and thank you for sharing, best wishes for your contest****kahpot
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Thank you! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay!
Comment from BrooklynnPreston
Transitioning from Childhood to Adulthood can be a hard transition, but it is always great to hold onto your memories like this. Great imagery, and you deserve the recognized award. Well done!
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Transitioning from Childhood to Adulthood can be a hard transition, but it is always great to hold onto your memories like this. Great imagery, and you deserve the recognized award. Well done!
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
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Thank you for the six stars review! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay!
Comment from Louise Michelle
I really enjoyed reading this, Raul. It brought back memories of when I took my kids to Disney World.
We're never too old to enjoy a little magic in our lives. In fact, I think it works better than medicine! Hugs, Lou
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
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I really enjoyed reading this, Raul. It brought back memories of when I took my kids to Disney World.
We're never too old to enjoy a little magic in our lives. In fact, I think it works better than medicine! Hugs, Lou
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
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Thank you! :) I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay!
Comment from WryWriter
I found your essay about the favorite time in your life a very enjoyable reading experience. Your descriptions of the things to see done well. I wish all children could go to this fantasy world to enjoy themselves!
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
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I found your essay about the favorite time in your life a very enjoyable reading experience. Your descriptions of the things to see done well. I wish all children could go to this fantasy world to enjoy themselves!
Comment Written 30-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2019
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Thank you! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay!
Comment from Iza Deleanu
An excellent trip down the memory line. I have never been to Disney World so thank you for allowing me to this this adventure through your eyes. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2019
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An excellent trip down the memory line. I have never been to Disney World so thank you for allowing me to this this adventure through your eyes. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2019
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Thank you! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my essay!
