The Monster Below
Hidden Deep19 total reviews
Comment from Janice Canerdy
WOW! You certainly have fulfilled the prompt. Your poem is skillfully-written, well-detailed, and really SPOOKY! Learning the truth about the speaker was truly a shock.
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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WOW! You certainly have fulfilled the prompt. Your poem is skillfully-written, well-detailed, and really SPOOKY! Learning the truth about the speaker was truly a shock.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Thank you for this great review, I was hoping it would be a surprise. I appreciate your reading my poem. :)
Comment from AprilViolet
Wow! You really nailed it with this poem boogienights! Sooo creepy with a definite plot twist at the end. Gave me the chills and made me think which is the mark of a good poet! Good luck with your contest!
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Wow! You really nailed it with this poem boogienights! Sooo creepy with a definite plot twist at the end. Gave me the chills and made me think which is the mark of a good poet! Good luck with your contest!
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Thank you a million times over!
Comment from Neonewman
Very nice! I loved the way this piece flowed with a delicious tale of terror from within. Thank you for sharing and Best of luck in the votes.
God bless
Steve
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Very nice! I loved the way this piece flowed with a delicious tale of terror from within. Thank you for sharing and Best of luck in the votes.
God bless
Steve
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Thank you for this generous review...i really appreciate it. :)
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My pleasure!
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Writer,
I had planned to just peruse the entries for this contest and see how the competition looked - see if I was interested in joining in. Didn't really plan to comment on any of them, really.
I started reading your poem and was like, yeah, yeah, blah, blah, monster in the house. Yep. Read it, seen it, have the t-shirt. Old story. Been done a ga-bil-a-zil-a-trillion times. At. Least.
But then - you pulled a fast one and made the monster the NARRATOR. I loved it. It was quite unexpected and changed the whole theme. It was clever and new and DIFFERENT.
--what?--
We don't do much of that here. hehehehe
So, I had to stop and say.... KUDOS!
Yay and good luck!!! Nice job. REALLY nice job. I enjoyed!
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Dear Mystery Writer,
I had planned to just peruse the entries for this contest and see how the competition looked - see if I was interested in joining in. Didn't really plan to comment on any of them, really.
I started reading your poem and was like, yeah, yeah, blah, blah, monster in the house. Yep. Read it, seen it, have the t-shirt. Old story. Been done a ga-bil-a-zil-a-trillion times. At. Least.
But then - you pulled a fast one and made the monster the NARRATOR. I loved it. It was quite unexpected and changed the whole theme. It was clever and new and DIFFERENT.
--what?--
We don't do much of that here. hehehehe
So, I had to stop and say.... KUDOS!
Yay and good luck!!! Nice job. REALLY nice job. I enjoyed!
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 13-Sep-2019
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Wow! Thank you for this terrific review... It means a lot to me. :)
Comment from Darkhorse555
an enraged demonic monster, without a human soul, these words just nailed it down perfectly the demons within excellent pen enjoyed the visions painted
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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an enraged demonic monster, without a human soul, these words just nailed it down perfectly the demons within excellent pen enjoyed the visions painted
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Thank you for this great review. I'm so glad you liked it. :)
Comment from the13thpoet
Hello fellow poet, hidden deep huh? Love the title, the poem had a nice flow and rhyme to it. Loved the twist at the end with you being the monster, awesome sauce. Great job and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Hello fellow poet, hidden deep huh? Love the title, the poem had a nice flow and rhyme to it. Loved the twist at the end with you being the monster, awesome sauce. Great job and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Thank you so much. I appreciate your taking time to read and review my scary poem! :)
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Oh my goodness this is a dark Jekyll and Hyde write! I liked your atmospheric horror write with a scary theme, this certainly fulfils the brief and your rhymes are spot on! Love Dolly x
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Oh my goodness this is a dark Jekyll and Hyde write! I liked your atmospheric horror write with a scary theme, this certainly fulfils the brief and your rhymes are spot on! Love Dolly x
Comment Written 12-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Thank you so much for this great review.
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A very good offering for this contest -- well written! ;) I would suggest, however that you do two things to improve your presentation:
first, use a larger font -- that red on black is only effective if eyes aren't having to strain to read it....in this case, the eyes are straining
second, put a blank space between each quatrain -- it eases your reader's tracking and allows them to 'get into' your poem/message... ;) :)
Thank you for sharing and best of luck at the polls...you should do well! ;) :)
that echo in my ear --> thdy echo in my ear [suggestion only...]
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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A very good offering for this contest -- well written! ;) I would suggest, however that you do two things to improve your presentation:
first, use a larger font -- that red on black is only effective if eyes aren't having to strain to read it....in this case, the eyes are straining
second, put a blank space between each quatrain -- it eases your reader's tracking and allows them to 'get into' your poem/message... ;) :)
Thank you for sharing and best of luck at the polls...you should do well! ;) :)
that echo in my ear --> thdy echo in my ear [suggestion only...]
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Thank you for your valuable advice. I made some changes for the better, thanks to you. :)
Comment from RodG
You evoke a creepy feeling right from the beginning as you set the scene, describing the monster trapped beneath the door which only the Speaker can hear. The Speaker, kind of a Jekyl and Hyde, actually evokes sympathy because he knows WHAT he is. Rod
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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You evoke a creepy feeling right from the beginning as you set the scene, describing the monster trapped beneath the door which only the Speaker can hear. The Speaker, kind of a Jekyl and Hyde, actually evokes sympathy because he knows WHAT he is. Rod
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2019
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Thank you for this terrific review...i really appreciate it. :)
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My pleasure. Rod
