A Woodland Rite
A Villanelle for Potlatch Poetry32 total reviews
Comment from Robert Zimmerman
Hi Yvonne. I like the format of the poem but my simplistic style of writing may not allow me to be that disciplined. The poem was entertaining and I enjoyed the read more than once.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Hi Yvonne. I like the format of the poem but my simplistic style of writing may not allow me to be that disciplined. The poem was entertaining and I enjoyed the read more than once.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Thank you. I'm glad you like it.
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you're welcome
Comment from Gloria ....
I really love this poem, Yvonne. Fairies and moonlight are always a favourite.
I do enjoy the single line of iambic trimester in and among the tetrameters. That really does make for a nice change.
Excellent work on a wonderful villanelle and most enjoyable poem. :)
Gloria
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I really love this poem, Yvonne. Fairies and moonlight are always a favourite.
I do enjoy the single line of iambic trimester in and among the tetrameters. That really does make for a nice change.
Excellent work on a wonderful villanelle and most enjoyable poem. :)
Gloria
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Thank you so much. I quite like the villanelle. I'm happy you like my poem.
Comment from Janice Canerdy
I really enjoyed this skillfully-written, delightful villanelle. You have made excellent use of specific details to describe a mystical, magical scene in which entertaining fairies are unaware of human viewers!
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I really enjoyed this skillfully-written, delightful villanelle. You have made excellent use of specific details to describe a mystical, magical scene in which entertaining fairies are unaware of human viewers!
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Someone pointed out to me that they knew I was there. lol. Thank you for a great review.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
This is an awesome villanelle, Yvonne. Your lines are perfect. I like the topic. It is expressed well. I could see the fairies dancing round. Your picture could not have been more perfect, too. The repeated lines fit in smoothly without screaming, "I'm a repeated line." Good job with touches of alliteration and internal rhyming--moonlight/bright. Everything works together with this poem tp make it a memorable read. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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This is an awesome villanelle, Yvonne. Your lines are perfect. I like the topic. It is expressed well. I could see the fairies dancing round. Your picture could not have been more perfect, too. The repeated lines fit in smoothly without screaming, "I'm a repeated line." Good job with touches of alliteration and internal rhyming--moonlight/bright. Everything works together with this poem tp make it a memorable read. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Thank you for this most wonderful review. I'm so happy you like it. It was fun to do.
Comment from lyenochka
I love the way you structured the meter in this poem. It sounds so nice. I would also not be able to move if I saw such a delightful, magical sight on a moonlit night!
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I love the way you structured the meter in this poem. It sounds so nice. I would also not be able to move if I saw such a delightful, magical sight on a moonlit night!
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I couldn't, either. Someone pointed out they probably knew I was there all along. lol. Thank you, Helen, for a great review.
Comment from Cindy Warren
Ah, they might not have looked at you, but they knew you were there. And who wouldn't want to watch fairies dance on an eerie moonlit night? This was a fun read. Thanks for the smile.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Ah, they might not have looked at you, but they knew you were there. And who wouldn't want to watch fairies dance on an eerie moonlit night? This was a fun read. Thanks for the smile.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I hadn't thought of that. I didn't think they saw me. lol. Thank you for a delightful review.
Comment from Darlene Franklin
You handled the villanelle so well, the repeated lines flow so smoothly with the poem that you don't even notice the repetition. My fantasy poem so far is childish compared to this masterpiece.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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You handled the villanelle so well, the repeated lines flow so smoothly with the poem that you don't even notice the repetition. My fantasy poem so far is childish compared to this masterpiece.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I bet yours is wonderful. I look forward to reading it. Thank you, Darlene, for this wonderful(!) review.
Yvonne
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You are welcome.
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I need to work on the rhythm. I'm using a rhyming double dactyl in tercets. And I don't have my accents on the right syllables so it sounds silly.
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I can help you with meter, if you'd like. 8-)
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I'm posting Trixie and Rudolph. Any suggestions you have, most welcome. This is a lot better than the previous version but not great.
Comment from Irish Rain
This is just wonderful.
The rhyme is superb, and it
flows beautifully.
Such a PRETTY Villanelle, one
of my favorite forms.
What a wonderful picture too!!
Blessings...
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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This is just wonderful.
The rhyme is superb, and it
flows beautifully.
Such a PRETTY Villanelle, one
of my favorite forms.
What a wonderful picture too!!
Blessings...
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Thank you for this wonderful review. I'm so happy you like it. I like the villanelle, too.
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It's just too perfect!!!
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Awww, bless your heart.
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Have a lovely weekend!!
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You, too.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
Pleasing fantasy poem. I was wondering if you were trying to get the same number of stressed syllables in each line? If so, the second line "I first saw fairies dance" might fit better with the rest of the lines if it said something like, "When I first saw the fairies dance." Have only written maybe 3 villanelles so I am a little rusty, though.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Pleasing fantasy poem. I was wondering if you were trying to get the same number of stressed syllables in each line? If so, the second line "I first saw fairies dance" might fit better with the rest of the lines if it said something like, "When I first saw the fairies dance." Have only written maybe 3 villanelles so I am a little rusty, though.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I'll take another look. Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Thomas Bowling
I see you have been hitting the absinthe again. Have you been getting visits from the little green fairies? I tried it once. I'll just stick to rum and Coke. That's as high as I want to get.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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I see you have been hitting the absinthe again. Have you been getting visits from the little green fairies? I tried it once. I'll just stick to rum and Coke. That's as high as I want to get.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2019
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Shhhhh. Don't tell anyone, but they visit me regularly without the absinthe. I don't want anyone to know because they might come over here and scare them away. lol
