Jack and Jill
100 word horror contest entry5 total reviews
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
This is an awesome entry for the 100 Word Horror contest. The grays and blacks within your overall presentation set the mood for horror, terror, fear. Love the house on the hill artwork and your first line of 'Jack and Jill went up the hill'. So cool that there appear to be dimmed lights in that house ... there's something living there (LOL).
It might just be my screen, but your 1st line in the 2nd stanza is cut off: 'with full intent to kill, they w'.
Great poem. Hope I don't feel a need to bury myself under the blankets tonight. Very, very best wishes.
reply by the author on 25-Jul-2019
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This is an awesome entry for the 100 Word Horror contest. The grays and blacks within your overall presentation set the mood for horror, terror, fear. Love the house on the hill artwork and your first line of 'Jack and Jill went up the hill'. So cool that there appear to be dimmed lights in that house ... there's something living there (LOL).
It might just be my screen, but your 1st line in the 2nd stanza is cut off: 'with full intent to kill, they w'.
Great poem. Hope I don't feel a need to bury myself under the blankets tonight. Very, very best wishes.
Comment Written 24-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 25-Jul-2019
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Thank you so much for the fantastic review and gracious stars, Gale. Someone else was telling me how their computer is messing up their writes once they're on here. The last word was 'went.' I'm glad you liked my little tale. Thank you again. Have a great night.
Ron
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You are quite the storyteller, and this was a fun review.
Last night as I was voting, I noticed other posts where words were cut off.
Comment from LyndaS
Well done, poet! Yeah, pretty creepy in under 100 words. You've told a complete story in 4 stanzas which is no small feat. LOVE the beast feasting on their flesh and bones. Yes, sick but that's just me. Really like the art you chose to go with it. Perfect. Good luck in this poorly titled contest. Ha! Lynda
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2019
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Well done, poet! Yeah, pretty creepy in under 100 words. You've told a complete story in 4 stanzas which is no small feat. LOVE the beast feasting on their flesh and bones. Yes, sick but that's just me. Really like the art you chose to go with it. Perfect. Good luck in this poorly titled contest. Ha! Lynda
Comment Written 23-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2019
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Wow, I sure didn't plan on seeing a sixer for dark piece. Thank you so much, Lynda. Yep, I guess he was hungry. Lol. I'm glad you liked the piece, L. Thank you again.
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Too bad. You get a sixer for ripping and shredding flesh and bones. Pretty cool. I liked this, sicko.
Comment from shaffer40
I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I guess I'll laugh, since it's only a story. Clever twist that he's distributing flyers and he's the perp (I watch too many detective shows). Well-done, and good surprise ending.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2019
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I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I guess I'll laugh, since it's only a story. Clever twist that he's distributing flyers and he's the perp (I watch too many detective shows). Well-done, and good surprise ending.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2019
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Thank you for the great review, Shaffer. I really appreciate the generous stars. I'm glad you liked this dark piece. Have a great night.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
Ugh, definitely on the horror and terror side. I could not have reviewed this 17 years ago, since I actually used to know a family who lost a young daughter to someone in the neighborhood in a horrific way like this. Certainly fits the category. The twist at the end is definitely gut-wrenching.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2019
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Ugh, definitely on the horror and terror side. I could not have reviewed this 17 years ago, since I actually used to know a family who lost a young daughter to someone in the neighborhood in a horrific way like this. Certainly fits the category. The twist at the end is definitely gut-wrenching.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2019
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Thank you for the great review, Crystie. Yes, that's the real horror of it, that sadly it actually does really happen. I appreciate the stars, C. Have a great night.
Comment from LisaMay
Most definitely horrific. The most unimaginable horror for a parent. You have written in the tone of a sociopathic killer... one hopes from imagination rather than from the fact you have a pile of corpses in your basement.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2019
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Most definitely horrific. The most unimaginable horror for a parent. You have written in the tone of a sociopathic killer... one hopes from imagination rather than from the fact you have a pile of corpses in your basement.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2019
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Thank you for the great review, Lisa. Yeah, this guy's twisted, that's for sure. Have a great night, L.
