Odyssey
the travel of Ulysse3 total reviews
Comment from beizanten
A very interesting poetry. I am sorry but it will much easier to comment in you seperate the poetry into 3 smaller stanza. other than that you have done beautifully
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A very interesting poetry. I am sorry but it will much easier to comment in you seperate the poetry into 3 smaller stanza. other than that you have done beautifully
Comment Written 08-Jul-2019
Comment from Y. M. Roger
A very intriguing idea here. I would suggest a little work on the meter and the almost rhymes (in some cases) to help with flow....it is just not a smooth read, but you have such a cool premise that, perhaps, you could work with some matching syllable counts (or at least close to a match). You could also take out the rhyme so that the reader is not trying to find that 'rhyme rhythm" and can simply enjoy your fun mythical fantasy. Either way, I wish you luck at the polls! ;) ;)
Ulysse, bound --> Ulysses, bound
melancolic melodies --> melancholic melodies
time greek --> time Greek
When the reached --> When they reached
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A very intriguing idea here. I would suggest a little work on the meter and the almost rhymes (in some cases) to help with flow....it is just not a smooth read, but you have such a cool premise that, perhaps, you could work with some matching syllable counts (or at least close to a match). You could also take out the rhyme so that the reader is not trying to find that 'rhyme rhythm" and can simply enjoy your fun mythical fantasy. Either way, I wish you luck at the polls! ;) ;)
Ulysse, bound --> Ulysses, bound
melancolic melodies --> melancholic melodies
time greek --> time Greek
When the reached --> When they reached
Comment Written 05-Jul-2019
Comment from Bill Schott
This story, Odyssey, a reduction of the passage past the Sirens by Odysseus, or Ulysses, has enough missing to leave someone with no knowledge of the original epic poem lost.
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This story, Odyssey, a reduction of the passage past the Sirens by Odysseus, or Ulysses, has enough missing to leave someone with no knowledge of the original epic poem lost.
Comment Written 05-Jul-2019
