Dialogue With Dad
450 words: Scrambling for understanding.22 total reviews
Comment from Rikki66
Good Luck in the contest. Dementia is always hard on the family as well as the patient if it is just senile dementia or Alzheimer's. I have had to struggle with both.
Rikki:)xo
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Good Luck in the contest. Dementia is always hard on the family as well as the patient if it is just senile dementia or Alzheimer's. I have had to struggle with both.
Rikki:)xo
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your review Rikki. You write from a position of knowledge, so you know how it is.
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I do; good luck and God Bless
Rikki:)
Comment from Gail Denham
Oh this is hard to keep a cheerful attitude at times when these events take place in the life of a parent or older friend. My mom was the silent type so she didnt' talk at all for the last few years - but I know her mind wasn't there any more.
A good quick look at what one day is like with dementia. Blessings
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Oh this is hard to keep a cheerful attitude at times when these events take place in the life of a parent or older friend. My mom was the silent type so she didnt' talk at all for the last few years - but I know her mind wasn't there any more.
A good quick look at what one day is like with dementia. Blessings
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your review, Gail. You know what it is like.
Comment from lyenochka
As I read this, I thought wow, LisaMay got her love for poetry and word play from her Dad! I remembered you shared before that you took care of your dad during his last years. I also remembered the crazy cat at the time. Thanks for sharing this entertaining dialogue and loved the picture, too. Someday, maybe I'll be able to see NZ.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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As I read this, I thought wow, LisaMay got her love for poetry and word play from her Dad! I remembered you shared before that you took care of your dad during his last years. I also remembered the crazy cat at the time. Thanks for sharing this entertaining dialogue and loved the picture, too. Someday, maybe I'll be able to see NZ.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Dad did teach me to be appreciative of poetry, but it is only recently that I began writing my own. Maybe I had to live a while and gather experiences.
Comment from juliaSjames
Very well written LisaMay. The conversation is like a piano piece. Left hand steady on the chords, keeping the beat. Right hand playing an erratic melody, sometimes tuneful, sometimes jarring.
My late mother passed at 94. She had suffered a massive stroke in her eighties that left her confined to a wheelchair. So she had her moments of confusion. But mostly she was coherent. Would repeat the same thing over and over at times. So patience was required, and the ability to steer the conversation to happier times in the past.
What a labour of love to care for your father all those years. I have heard from friends that their loved ones could be violent. And therefore had to be institutionalized. Clearly this wasn't true of your experience. Thank God.
I thought you were a leetle bit heavy on the rhyming.
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Very well written LisaMay. The conversation is like a piano piece. Left hand steady on the chords, keeping the beat. Right hand playing an erratic melody, sometimes tuneful, sometimes jarring.
My late mother passed at 94. She had suffered a massive stroke in her eighties that left her confined to a wheelchair. So she had her moments of confusion. But mostly she was coherent. Would repeat the same thing over and over at times. So patience was required, and the ability to steer the conversation to happier times in the past.
What a labour of love to care for your father all those years. I have heard from friends that their loved ones could be violent. And therefore had to be institutionalized. Clearly this wasn't true of your experience. Thank God.
I thought you were a leetle bit heavy on the rhyming.
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I do like your analogy of the conversation being like a piano piece... I can see that quite clearly now in my written piece and it describes exactly how I wanted it to feel. Yes, I did overdo the silly rhyming somewhat, just to underline how annoying it could get but that patience had to prevail.
Your experience with your mother would have been painful to watch also.
My dear gentle and gentlemanly father only became violent when he was in daycare respite, to give me a break from time to time. He got a nun in a headlock one day!! He would have been so horrified at his actions. But he never ever even spoke aggressively to me.
Thank you so much for your caring review. xx
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You're welcome. Just realized I got so involved in the write I forgot to wish you good luck in the contest. :-)) I think that's a good sign, don't you?
Blessings Julia
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Yes it is a great sign to be thus distracted. Thanks for your good wishes.
Comment from Joy Graham
Hello Lisa,
I think you did a fine job of this conversation only story for the contest. You portray the dementia well, and respectfully. It is good to share stories like this one so others may be aware that they are not alone. Readers may not understand at the moment, but somewhere in their future they will be introduced to it. They will look back on this story as a learning moment and understand.
Best wishes in the contest. This is well-written. I see no spag.
Joy xx
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Hello Lisa,
I think you did a fine job of this conversation only story for the contest. You portray the dementia well, and respectfully. It is good to share stories like this one so others may be aware that they are not alone. Readers may not understand at the moment, but somewhere in their future they will be introduced to it. They will look back on this story as a learning moment and understand.
Best wishes in the contest. This is well-written. I see no spag.
Joy xx
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Alzheimer's is probably our biggest fear as we age, so the more we know about it, both as sufferers and as carers, the better. Thank you for thinking my story adds to the awareness.
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
I applaud you for taking care of your Dad as you have as many I know simply tuck them away in a home of some kind. My Mom and I hospice my Dad at home until his death. Nobody will ever convince me that there is a better place to be than surrounded by loved ones in your time of greatest need. I thought your entry well written and a very tasteful way in which to express the amount a love and patience required to care for those who tend to drift in and out of lucidity. Good luck in the judging and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I applaud you for taking care of your Dad as you have as many I know simply tuck them away in a home of some kind. My Mom and I hospice my Dad at home until his death. Nobody will ever convince me that there is a better place to be than surrounded by loved ones in your time of greatest need. I thought your entry well written and a very tasteful way in which to express the amount a love and patience required to care for those who tend to drift in and out of lucidity. Good luck in the judging and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your comments here. I knew that looking after Dad would have its difficulties, but I agree with you about home care for our loved ones. xx
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did a good job, LisaMay, with your contest entry. Your lines flow smoothly with a good story behind them. It reads well. I believe there is bi reason to feel like it is offensive. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes. Jan
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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You did a good job, LisaMay, with your contest entry. Your lines flow smoothly with a good story behind them. It reads well. I believe there is bi reason to feel like it is offensive. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes. Jan
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your positive review, Jan... some folks might have thought I was taking such a serious condition lightly.
Comment from Rachelle Allen
This was poignant and touching and showed such love and patience on "Hannah"'s part. (In regard to the Author's Note, not for one moment did it strike me as 'a cheap shot for laughs,' but I think you were so wise to put that at the end of the piece, anyway, for peace of mind. If I'd just read this, never knowing you, I would have taken the same feeling away that I did with you as my close friend. It is that expertly written. You conveyed exactly what you intended perfectly, but I know it's not always easy to trust that. Please know that you are masterful, and you needn't ever worry.
This was a very memorable read. In my opinion, it is SoM material. xo
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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This was poignant and touching and showed such love and patience on "Hannah"'s part. (In regard to the Author's Note, not for one moment did it strike me as 'a cheap shot for laughs,' but I think you were so wise to put that at the end of the piece, anyway, for peace of mind. If I'd just read this, never knowing you, I would have taken the same feeling away that I did with you as my close friend. It is that expertly written. You conveyed exactly what you intended perfectly, but I know it's not always easy to trust that. Please know that you are masterful, and you needn't ever worry.
This was a very memorable read. In my opinion, it is SoM material. xo
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Gosh thanks for these comments. I put that author's note comment in because the first time I wrote something about Dad that mentioned his Alzheimers, several months ago, I got a review from some crusty old dude telling me off for making mock of the disease and my father. He pulled his head in quick smart when I explained that I had looked after my father with loving diligence for 8 yrs. So I didn't want a repeat this time round as well.
I quite liked writing dialogue only. Maybe I will try writing some scripts... seeing as how I have reached 'masterful' status it must be time for a new challenge.
By the way, congratulations to us for being on FS for 6 months, and learning a lot and being successful from time to time. xx
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Yes, we've brought great zeal and enthusiasm to our graduating class!!
Comment from Patty Palmer
LisaMay, this is a well written dialogue. Yes, it brought some chuckles from me, but as a nurse I realized that you were making a point of Dementia is often difficult to deal with, and more difficult to deal with is when it's a parent. The pain of them not knowing who you are. But taking him out for trips is awesome. Some are embarrassed, but 1'm glad that you aren't one! I didn't see any errors. Good luck on the contest!
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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LisaMay, this is a well written dialogue. Yes, it brought some chuckles from me, but as a nurse I realized that you were making a point of Dementia is often difficult to deal with, and more difficult to deal with is when it's a parent. The pain of them not knowing who you are. But taking him out for trips is awesome. Some are embarrassed, but 1'm glad that you aren't one! I didn't see any errors. Good luck on the contest!
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your wonderful review, Patty. I just finished reading your nursing story, so clearly you are very familiar with this sort of situation. I was very close to Dad and included him in everything I did, as much as possible. Yes, I was embarrassed at times, but I figured that a lot of people have ageing parents and would understand.
Comment from Alex Rosel
I enjoyed reading this. I can definitely relate to this and its veracity. It brought back memories of my mother in her last few years when she used to resort to silly rhymes.
Dementia in all its forms is such a hideous affliction, but it's also filled with many moments of humor. To offer up fiction that reflects this is, I think, so much better than serving up only the hopelessness and depressing side of it.
I didn't pick up on any spags :)
Good luck with the competition :)
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I enjoyed reading this. I can definitely relate to this and its veracity. It brought back memories of my mother in her last few years when she used to resort to silly rhymes.
Dementia in all its forms is such a hideous affliction, but it's also filled with many moments of humor. To offer up fiction that reflects this is, I think, so much better than serving up only the hopelessness and depressing side of it.
I didn't pick up on any spags :)
Good luck with the competition :)
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your review comments, Alex. Your own experience with your mother can't have been easy either. Sadness and comedy were inextricably linked at my house when Dad was there. Then when he forgot who I was it turned into depressing.
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Yes, at time is was very difficult for me also. I think. laughter sometimes served as a sort of release valve.
One of the things I liked about your piece, and forgot to mention, was that you didn't over-sentimentalize it.
I don't know how long ago your father lived with you, but I hope you have many fond memories.
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Dad was with me for 8 years; plenty of good memories, heartbreak too.
