Open Casket
Sometimes it's easier to not explain.10 total reviews
Comment from Rikki66
This was the punch line to an old joke. It is nicely retold. I wish you luck in the contest. I am sure the mourners did not see the joke.
Rikki:)*******
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2019
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This was the punch line to an old joke. It is nicely retold. I wish you luck in the contest. I am sure the mourners did not see the joke.
Rikki:)*******
Comment Written 04-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2019
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I am glad you liked it. Thank you for the review.
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Welcome.
Rikki:)
Comment from john mallahan
When read the subject you have proposed, am reminded of my younger brother who stewed in a flurry of disbelief. He went to the cemetery, dug into the grave, opened the coffin, so he could see, for one final time, his friend. Now, why he didn't attend the ceremony, don't know. This, was his style...
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2019
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When read the subject you have proposed, am reminded of my younger brother who stewed in a flurry of disbelief. He went to the cemetery, dug into the grave, opened the coffin, so he could see, for one final time, his friend. Now, why he didn't attend the ceremony, don't know. This, was his style...
Comment Written 04-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2019
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Some people like to have their own personal moments. Your brother sounds like quite a character. I am glad you liked the story. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Bill Schott
This eighty-word flash fiction story, Open Casket, has the proper word count and seems to find a premature burial victim escaping his sad fate. The ending is both bizarre and humorous as the reader is left to decide who is supposed to be in the grave.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2019
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This eighty-word flash fiction story, Open Casket, has the proper word count and seems to find a premature burial victim escaping his sad fate. The ending is both bizarre and humorous as the reader is left to decide who is supposed to be in the grave.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your review. Sometimes the best thing to do is leave the reader wondering.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
He he he, you made me smile here and I wish you luck with the contest, I didn't expect the ending and you surprised me! I hate funerals! Best wishes, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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He he he, you made me smile here and I wish you luck with the contest, I didn't expect the ending and you surprised me! I hate funerals! Best wishes, love Dolly x
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I am glad you liked it and I love that it surprised you. Thank you for the review.
Comment from Bill Pinder
Thanks for sharing this humorous entry about an open casket with a surprise escape. That would be either funny or terrifying to see in real life. Good imagination used in this creative writing. Have a great holiday! Bill
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thanks for sharing this humorous entry about an open casket with a surprise escape. That would be either funny or terrifying to see in real life. Good imagination used in this creative writing. Have a great holiday! Bill
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I am so glad you liked the story. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Alex Rosel
I think this is a good entry for the contest. The only thing is I got confused between Charlie and Ted. Is this a spag? Do you mean the same person?
Apart from that, here is one further point you might like to consider:
His breath almost expended his hands broke through the ground that covered him. -- Spag? Insert comma after almost expended.
Good luck with the competition :)
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I think this is a good entry for the contest. The only thing is I got confused between Charlie and Ted. Is this a spag? Do you mean the same person?
Apart from that, here is one further point you might like to consider:
His breath almost expended his hands broke through the ground that covered him. -- Spag? Insert comma after almost expended.
Good luck with the competition :)
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I noticed that I did that, using two different names, and I have fixed it and will add the comma. Thank you for your review and help. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
I'm not sure this piece works. There's no logic to it. If he fell in the grave and got covered in dirt, he'd have suffocated. If he fell in an open casket it would have been discovered or he'd have been buried after the lid went on. If he was in the grave prior to the coffin lowering he'd have had to get past the coffin too.
I get this is a 'funny' little piece but it's totally implausible.
Might just be me though.
GMG
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Hi there,
I'm not sure this piece works. There's no logic to it. If he fell in the grave and got covered in dirt, he'd have suffocated. If he fell in an open casket it would have been discovered or he'd have been buried after the lid went on. If he was in the grave prior to the coffin lowering he'd have had to get past the coffin too.
I get this is a 'funny' little piece but it's totally implausible.
Might just be me though.
GMG
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your review. How he got in the ground and stayed alive is supposed to be a mystery since he states that it has happened before.
Comment from Earl Corp
That is one cool dude to claw his way out of a grave then just shake it off like nothing happened. This was very appropriately labeled, it was hilarious. You got my vote. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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That is one cool dude to claw his way out of a grave then just shake it off like nothing happened. This was very appropriately labeled, it was hilarious. You got my vote. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your review. I am so glad you liked it.
Comment from Brenda Henderson
That was hilarious and completely unexpected. Please tell me that this is only the beginning and not the end of this story. I hope that you plan to expound on this. I'm certain that your readers will appreciate this piece. Good work. Compelling story.
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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That was hilarious and completely unexpected. Please tell me that this is only the beginning and not the end of this story. I hope that you plan to expound on this. I'm certain that your readers will appreciate this piece. Good work. Compelling story.
Comment Written 02-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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I had not thought of expanding on this, but I am now. Thank you for your review and time.
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You're Welcome!
Comment from Hitcher
Ha ha, this is an exceptional slice of flash fiction my friend. Not a single word wasted! The scene came alive and clawed its way into my consciousness and making me SMILE : )) My kind of flash fiction for sure, You got my vote! Brilliant!!
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Ha ha, this is an exceptional slice of flash fiction my friend. Not a single word wasted! The scene came alive and clawed its way into my consciousness and making me SMILE : )) My kind of flash fiction for sure, You got my vote! Brilliant!!
Comment Written 02-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 03-Jul-2019
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Thank you for your review. I am so glad you liked it. The six stars are more then I could have hoped for.
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Just voted, good luck : ))
