Chip's Poetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Morning After The Night Before"FanStory Collection
19 total reviews
Comment from Randa Dayle
I am happy for the hazy, hungover man, and I am glad is girly friend reminded him of her name... good job, in the in carnal poetry contest! Well done
reply by the author on 06-May-2019
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I am happy for the hazy, hungover man, and I am glad is girly friend reminded him of her name... good job, in the in carnal poetry contest! Well done
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 06-May-2019
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Thanks, Randa!
Comment from Ms. Snyder
The one time I had sixes left over and I gave em all out then I didn't know this contest even existed. I coincidentally wrote something that was in this genre! But I have opted not to enter any more contests only the ones that I have been obligated to since the beginning of the year - this one would have been SO up my alley - LOL - and then I read this - and WOW - you did a great job and I think I know who the author of this is - and I am laughing so hard right now, shush - anyway I LOVED IT!!! Unfortunately, I went and gave away every SIX about fifteen minutes ago to some people who hadn't seen me in a while. Then I posted mine and crossed my fingers to see if anyone would care that I posted something on a Sunday and then came to read the money stuff. LOL WOW - GREAT POEM and I hate saying this I do I should wait to give a 6 for this but I'm gonna give a 5 and say VIRTUAL SIX - but if I get a vote (THIS ONE IS DEFINITELY MY VOTE!!!) Also I see a few words why you had to put it in Over 18, now I'm questioning if I should have put mine there. Good luck in the contest and I really want this one to WIN!!!! Cheers, Fonda
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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The one time I had sixes left over and I gave em all out then I didn't know this contest even existed. I coincidentally wrote something that was in this genre! But I have opted not to enter any more contests only the ones that I have been obligated to since the beginning of the year - this one would have been SO up my alley - LOL - and then I read this - and WOW - you did a great job and I think I know who the author of this is - and I am laughing so hard right now, shush - anyway I LOVED IT!!! Unfortunately, I went and gave away every SIX about fifteen minutes ago to some people who hadn't seen me in a while. Then I posted mine and crossed my fingers to see if anyone would care that I posted something on a Sunday and then came to read the money stuff. LOL WOW - GREAT POEM and I hate saying this I do I should wait to give a 6 for this but I'm gonna give a 5 and say VIRTUAL SIX - but if I get a vote (THIS ONE IS DEFINITELY MY VOTE!!!) Also I see a few words why you had to put it in Over 18, now I'm questioning if I should have put mine there. Good luck in the contest and I really want this one to WIN!!!! Cheers, Fonda
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Well, Fonda, it was nearly as exciting reading your review as it was writing my poem! Thank you for your virtual generosity, I'll take the wannabe 6! You should certainly post your entry- this is the first contest with REQUIRED saucy content, at least since I joined not long ago. Write on!
Comment from kiwisteveh
An interesting tale, though I have to tell you right now that the ending just didn't feel right. Did you run out of rhymes, or am I missing something about the name Guinivere?
Anyway, the rest of it delivered the story with some style and covered the prompt well. Do you think 'length optional' is a deliberate double entendre?
Good luck in the contest.
Steve
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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An interesting tale, though I have to tell you right now that the ending just didn't feel right. Did you run out of rhymes, or am I missing something about the name Guinivere?
Anyway, the rest of it delivered the story with some style and covered the prompt well. Do you think 'length optional' is a deliberate double entendre?
Good luck in the contest.
Steve
Comment Written 05-May-2019
reply by the author on 05-May-2019
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Thanks, Steve. Do you struggle with the odd-timed introduction itself or simply the name choice? The original name was different (I may change it back), but it isn't an exact rhyme. Though, considering where I'm from and our stereotypical accents, it works perfectly!
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion, though complying perfectly with the prompt in design, the rhyming rhythm is a bit uneven throughout, but since rhyming is not required, its narration conforms with an experience of striking realism. Best of luck in the contest...
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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In my opinion, though complying perfectly with the prompt in design, the rhyming rhythm is a bit uneven throughout, but since rhyming is not required, its narration conforms with an experience of striking realism. Best of luck in the contest...
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks, eve.
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You are very welcome indeed...Eve
Comment from Sandra Elizabeth Williams
This is so super raunchy, Contestant. It is easy to visualize the scenes from the descriptive words you have used. It sounds very believable as well.
Best of luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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This is so super raunchy, Contestant. It is easy to visualize the scenes from the descriptive words you have used. It sounds very believable as well.
Best of luck in the contest!
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks so much, Sandra!
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You're very welcome!
Comment from LG Wolfe
This is a hilarious and sexy work, perfect for this contest entry. I loved its combination of 'in your face' eroticism and clever humour, within a solid technical rhyme. Nice work.
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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This is a hilarious and sexy work, perfect for this contest entry. I loved its combination of 'in your face' eroticism and clever humour, within a solid technical rhyme. Nice work.
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thank you, LG!
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written sensual poem about a flirtation with a sexy girl that becomes a second time around the morning after, the man think he has struck the jackpot.
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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A very well-written sensual poem about a flirtation with a sexy girl that becomes a second time around the morning after, the man think he has struck the jackpot.
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks, Sandra!
Comment from Tpa
it flows beautifully as I read through it and the punctuation (or purposeful lack of) keeps me at the rhythm that I know the author intended for me. I also pay particular attention to the presentation of it. Since there are usually fewer letters and words than a story or article, I place great importance on the spacing, placement and actual choice of letters and words. Presentation is everything to me with a 5.0.
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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it flows beautifully as I read through it and the punctuation (or purposeful lack of) keeps me at the rhythm that I know the author intended for me. I also pay particular attention to the presentation of it. Since there are usually fewer letters and words than a story or article, I place great importance on the spacing, placement and actual choice of letters and words. Presentation is everything to me with a 5.0.
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks, Tpa!
Comment from bhogg
I certainly think you met the requirements of "carnal caperings'. I found your post well written, no areas I see that need to be revisited. I'd like to read some of the other entries, but at 70, not sure my heart can take it. Bill
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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I certainly think you met the requirements of "carnal caperings'. I found your post well written, no areas I see that need to be revisited. I'd like to read some of the other entries, but at 70, not sure my heart can take it. Bill
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks for the read, Bill! (fortunately, these types of entries come with warnings, so peruse at your own risk;^)
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was a really racy poem, it certainly delivered what the contest was after!! lol. I'm surprised you managed to keep the rhyme going so well, it was flawless. Well done, it's an excellent contest entry. Good luck! Sandra xx
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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That was a really racy poem, it certainly delivered what the contest was after!! lol. I'm surprised you managed to keep the rhyme going so well, it was flawless. Well done, it's an excellent contest entry. Good luck! Sandra xx
Comment Written 04-May-2019
reply by the author on 04-May-2019
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Thanks, Sandra!