A Sister's Betrayal (a sonnet)
Question contest entry9 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written sonnet about the betrayal of a sister. Theread are many questions we can ask ourselves about how can the person you trust your whole life betrays you in the wink of an eye.
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2019
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A very well-written sonnet about the betrayal of a sister. Theread are many questions we can ask ourselves about how can the person you trust your whole life betrays you in the wink of an eye.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 29-Apr-2019
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Thank you for the great review, Sandra. I really appreciate the generous stars. I'm glad you liked the piece.
Ron
Comment from Bill Pinder
This is a well done, interesting sonnet. Genuine love does involve trust, and it is very rough when the trust is broken. It is almost impossible to completely forgive and rebuild healthy trust. In the last line, is the woman asking her sire if he can trust her?
Bill
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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This is a well done, interesting sonnet. Genuine love does involve trust, and it is very rough when the trust is broken. It is almost impossible to completely forgive and rebuild healthy trust. In the last line, is the woman asking her sire if he can trust her?
Bill
Comment Written 28-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Yes, that's what she's asking. I actually wrote the piece after I found the picture. I see in her eyes she can get anything she wants just from her looks but I see a sinister side of her as well. Lol. I was just trying to get that in there somewhere. Thank you for the great review and generous stars, Bill. I'm glad you liked the piece. Have a great rest of your weekend.
Comment from kiwijenny
Betrayal by a sister is hardest because we expect to trust and love her.
Will death befall her fate as I have asked?
Would kingdoms burn to ash at my request?....creepiest question lines...
Well penned to answer the prompt but I need a shower to cleanse,
God bless
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Betrayal by a sister is hardest because we expect to trust and love her.
Will death befall her fate as I have asked?
Would kingdoms burn to ash at my request?....creepiest question lines...
Well penned to answer the prompt but I need a shower to cleanse,
God bless
Comment Written 28-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Lol, yeah, we need a shower after that, haha. Thank you for the great review, Jenny. Have a wonderful rest of your weekend.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Lack of trust is not merit to be seen within one's eyes, the story of sister's betrayal is royally described; well said, well done. Thank you for sharing. Keep Writing Inspire Changing -- DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Lack of trust is not merit to be seen within one's eyes, the story of sister's betrayal is royally described; well said, well done. Thank you for sharing. Keep Writing Inspire Changing -- DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 28-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Thank you for the great review, Al. I really appreciate the generous stars.
Comment from oliver818
I enjoyed this poem. A real sense of character comes through the voice which is quite impressive. I can imagine the scene quite clearly. Thanks for sharing this and best of luck with the competition.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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I enjoyed this poem. A real sense of character comes through the voice which is quite impressive. I can imagine the scene quite clearly. Thanks for sharing this and best of luck with the competition.
Comment Written 28-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Thank you for the excellent review, Oliver. I appreciate the generous stars and good luck wishes. I'm glad you liked my dark little piece. Have a great rest of your weekend.
Comment from Beri Bee
This is so intriguing and evocative of other times and other worlds! You've done the iambic pentameter really well! Best of luck with this entry in the sonnet contest!
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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This is so intriguing and evocative of other times and other worlds! You've done the iambic pentameter really well! Best of luck with this entry in the sonnet contest!
Comment Written 27-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Thank you for the fantastic review, Beri. I really appreciate the generous stars and good luck wishes. I'm glad you liked my little tale. Have a great rest of your weekend.
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
This is good and well thought out. It's like a soap opera or the makings of a miniseries or movie. All the ingredients of a real life event can be found in this. I like it and enjoyed reading this well written offering. Well done!
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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This is good and well thought out. It's like a soap opera or the makings of a miniseries or movie. All the ingredients of a real life event can be found in this. I like it and enjoyed reading this well written offering. Well done!
Comment Written 27-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Thank you for the fantastic review, Jeffrey. I really appreciate the generous stars, friend. I'm glad you liked the piece. Have a great rest of your weekend.
Comment from LyndaS
Wow! To be honest, it took a few minutes for me to even read this. I was HYPNOTIZED by this woman's eyes. Couldn't stop staring at her. This art selection is phenomenal.
First, this is excellent by way of iambic meter and stanza formation. So many people slaughter this. Also the contest requirements have been met in spades.
The story here is wicked and delicious. If you want me, kill your wife (who by the way is my sister), make me your queen and then give me power. Poor bastard. One look in her eyes and the king is toast.
"And shall I reign in whole when she is gone?" "I'll fill your every need with dark desire." "Is trust a merit seen within my eyes?" This are lines that captured my fancy. She is evil and desirable. She's a meticulous manipulator who has no morals but who is not without her wiles. Loved it.
As a whole, this is a strong entry into your contest. It's a perfect sonnet with a complete and powerful story. Good luck in the vote, poet. You deserve a win with this. Lynda
Still staring at her eyes. Great picture!
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Wow! To be honest, it took a few minutes for me to even read this. I was HYPNOTIZED by this woman's eyes. Couldn't stop staring at her. This art selection is phenomenal.
First, this is excellent by way of iambic meter and stanza formation. So many people slaughter this. Also the contest requirements have been met in spades.
The story here is wicked and delicious. If you want me, kill your wife (who by the way is my sister), make me your queen and then give me power. Poor bastard. One look in her eyes and the king is toast.
"And shall I reign in whole when she is gone?" "I'll fill your every need with dark desire." "Is trust a merit seen within my eyes?" This are lines that captured my fancy. She is evil and desirable. She's a meticulous manipulator who has no morals but who is not without her wiles. Loved it.
As a whole, this is a strong entry into your contest. It's a perfect sonnet with a complete and powerful story. Good luck in the vote, poet. You deserve a win with this. Lynda
Still staring at her eyes. Great picture!
Comment Written 27-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Thank you so much for the fantastic review, Lynda. One of the best reviews I've ever gotten on this site. I'm glad you grasped the whole concept of what's going on in this. She's killing off her own sister for power, lol. Actually, this go round, I was writing to the picture. I found this great pic and just had to use it. I had a different idea in mind when I started and it sort of just went its own direction. That happens sometimes. I dearly appreciate the gracious stars. It made my day. Thank you again. Have a wonderful rest of your weekend.
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Any time.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I adored our sonnet, a sinister plotting sentiment here and your meter is perfect with superb rhymes! I love the turn on the third stanza and rounded off nicely with the couplet, altogether this is a great story with intrigue and mystery and a well put together sonnet for my ears, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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I adored our sonnet, a sinister plotting sentiment here and your meter is perfect with superb rhymes! I love the turn on the third stanza and rounded off nicely with the couplet, altogether this is a great story with intrigue and mystery and a well put together sonnet for my ears, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2019
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Thank you for the great review, Dolly. I dearly appreciate the gracious stars. I'm glad you liked the piece. Have a wonderful rest of your weekend.
